Shading Grey
by 7-11midnightreader
Summary: Elena Lincoln, wife to Edgar Lincoln, owner, CEO, and head prick of Lincoln Lumber International. She manages their home and social schedule. Her hobbies: her home, her garden and the young men she hires to maintain it. Please note: EL James set Christians age at fifteen. It is not an age I would choose for my male protagonist. I will not argue with the original authors history.
1. Note

Dearest Reader updates may slow down for a moment. The protagonist from a piece of original fiction I am writing started yelling. She needs for me to get some stuff down so I can do my research for her book. It shouldn't take long.

Elena hasn't gone anywhere. In fact she is standing in the corner, tapping her watch and _her_ foot. Fantasizing what she wants to do to me and my new heroine. I think I am in deep shit with her. And an angry Elena is always fun.


	2. Preface

I use fan fiction as a writing exercise to stretch my ability to write within an existing framework. I refuse to change an existing character's history. My story may cross an existing time line but will not follow it. That story has already been told. I use writing to explore the inside of other characters. Often stretching very far from the person I am.

Given the headlines of today's society, it is a topic ripe for discussion. Young males often abused by respected members of the community. The abuse hidden for long periods of time. I don't have to point to specifics we have all heard the stories.

This subject matter is difficult. It is often challenging and painful to write. It is a hard edge to walk, telling the story, knowing what has been said. Trying to stay within bounds, not push the limits too far.

Elena Lincoln is an over the top character. She is a pedophile and I do not condone her behavior even as I try to look through her eyes.

The male I use as my inspiration for submissive Christian Grey, is a thirty year old male adult model and performer. I do enjoy looking at his body bound, his face pained, and his cock hard as a rock. I will not deny or defend my preference for submissive male gods.

So be warned this story contains graphic descriptions of an inappropriate relationship between a thirty four year old woman and a fifteen year old young man. These descriptors are often both abusive and sexual in nature.


	3. Chapter 1 - learning control

It's mid afternoon and I stand at my kitchen window watching the young man work in my garden. There are certain advantages to having a great deal of money. Indulging my hobbies is one of them. My husband is rarely home. Wife seems to be just my job description. Viewed that way as much to me as my husband. Somewhere around year two, when I complained of missing him, he told me to get a some hobbies. So I did. This house, its garden, and the young men I hire to work around it. Redoing the kitchen garden is always my favorite project. Seems I have it redone every year.

He looks hot out there, sweat rolling off his bare chest. Muscles flexing as he moves the grey slate into the dumpster. He runs his hand through his hair. He has quite a reputation already. I have heard he has a brilliant mind, though he seems to like to settle things with his fists. His mom thought some physical labor might help. I have another idea. I intend to find out, exactly what he is made of.

I want him a little more uncomfortable, a little hotter, more weary, edgy. I keep watching, I love the lean long shape to his body. He has a soft happy trail leading into soft jeans barely hanging on his hips. His chest is still smooth, his shoulders are broad, his waist is narrow, he still has that hollow look. He pulls the white wife beater from his back pocket and wipes the sweat from his face. Runs his hand through his hair again. I grab two glasses and pour lemonade for us.

I continue to watch him move. There is something tense, wound tight in him. He works hard, harder than most of these rich twits. These boys don't work for their paycheck, they work to keep daddy's credit card. The money they earn in a summer wouldn't pay for one of their nights out. The three largest landscape firms in the area are know for the rich boys they hire. Placing them carefully, making sure even though they are working, they are making the right connections.

A piece of the rubble shifts, coming down on his fingers. He throws his head back, swearing, stabbing his fingers into his mouth. Then he is shaking the hand flexing the fingers a grimace on his face. That's my cue . I pick up the glasses and head out to the garden. I stop in front of the mirror in the mud room. I turned thirty four my last birthday. Anywhere, but here I would be mistaken for my early twenties. But, this is sunny southern California, nothing is what it seems.

My golden hair is pulled tightly off my face, high on my head, cascading down my back from a pony tail. From head to toe my skin is a polished bronze, flawless. My large blue eyes are rimmed in kohl, the lashes long and lush. The gloss on my lips gone, probably from chewing them while watching him. I quickly apply a fresh layer of forbidden red gloss. I pick up the glasses and head for the back yard.

I can feel him watching me as I make my way to the kitchen garden. He should be watching, I work hard to look like this. I spend four days a week in the gym, two at the salon, and my husbands fortune to hang very expensive clothing on the results. I am Elena Lincoln, rich bitch, wife to Edgar Lincoln, the owner, CEO, and general prick of Lincoln Lumber.

I hand him the lemonade, he takes the glass and downs the liquid. I take the empty glass, stepping in as close as I dare. If I took a deep breath my chest would brush against his. I hand him the lemonade I intended for myself.

_"It's starting to shape up our here. It looks like hot, tiring work. I thought you could use a break."_ It's my opening shot, let's see how this goes. How easily can I provoke him?

_"Ya, think" _he kind of mumbles He can't keep his eyes off me. I have watched them travel from my high and perky breasts to my long bare thighs. From the bulge in the front of his jeans, he is already distracted. I step back, and start talking about my plans for the garden. I point to the different beds, making sure to stretch and bend giving a full view of my body. Then I see it, a weed in the herb bed, I bend from the waist, stretch, and pluck the offending bit of green.

He snarls_ "Nice ass"_ gotcha I think to myself. I straighten, look him square in the eye, and I slap his face. I slap him hard, it snaps his head, and leaves a clear hand print on his cheek. His mouth drops open in shock, before he can recover, I grab his chin. I hold his face still and I kiss him. I kiss him hard. I nip at his lips, biting, pulling, relentlessly until they part. Our tongues tangle, then he is kissing me back. Really gotcha, I think, stopping the kiss. I slap his face again, harder if that is possible, turn on my heel and walk back into the house.

I can feel his gaze following me. I am sure I know the expression on his face. Confused, hot, horny and angry. In a word perfect. My walk to the house is slow, controlled, deliberate. I am wet, there is tension in my lower belly, excitement, anticipation. Every step moves the fabric of my bikini against my parts. It is exquisitely excruciating. Once in the house, I let my control go, I practically sprint to the kitchen. I want to watch him, need to watch him.

I gaze out the kitchen window. He is still standing exactly where I left him. His gaze is fixed where I disappeared from view. His right hand is gently caressing the still visible hand print on his cheek, his left is running over the bulge in his jeans. I see his hand tighten squeezing himself. I climb onto the counter, sitting with my feet in the sink, I watch him. His hand continues to fondle himself, I am sure he wants nothing more than to pull his cock out, and jerk it to a cum.

He stands there for a good ten minutes trying to puzzle it out. My right hand is kneading my left breast, I roll my nipple between my index finger and thumb. Tugging, I feel the liquid flooding between my legs. I unscrew the handle from the sprayer, and turn on the water. I move the stream of water so it flows over my body, as I continue playing along my skin with my right hand. My perfectly polished red nails glint as the sunlight hits them, tracing circles playing with the water. Every inch of my skin is alive, the tension in my body building. I move the stream of water with my left hand, holding the hose at the spray connection. The moving focal point of the water and my nail tips dance. My back arches, almost begging me to hurry. I flood my belly button with the spray following it with the edge of my nail just circling the rim.

I need to slow down, I want to relish this moment. I look at him, he continues to work. He stops and looks towards the house as if he can feel my eyes on him. The memory catches him, he runs his palm over over the now faded hand print. The bulge has returned to the front of his jeans. He moves his hand over his clearly uncomfortable erection. He adjust himself, runs his hand through his hair, and goes back to work.

My left hand is now working my right breast, rolling the nipple pulling twisting. My right hand trails the water, my nails play in my soft neatly groomed triangle of pubic hair. My left hand is trailing my nails along my neck and over my collar bone. I refuse to look like a little girl, and although I prefer my men young. I have no interest in hairless prepubescent boys. The young man outside is a walking hard on and I intend to harnesses that energy and direct it. The water flows through my hair and over my smooth labia. My left hand has started across my abdomen, the gentle swirl of my nails, pushing me. My right hand moves closer the pressure of the water driving me right to the edge. My hips rock against the stainless steel edge of the sink practically begging me to let go. I look out the window again, at first I can't see him. Oh, he has his back to me, the waist band of his jeans sags at the top of his thighs, the band of his boxers cups the lower edge of his butt. I close my eyes, I imagine that butt, his butt peppered with my red hand prints. I plunge two fingers in. Moving them furiously, I shatter. Breaking into a million pieces floating lost. I collapse onto the counter, panting. I am still recovering when Izzy arrives her arms loaded with groceries.

_"New boy toy Ms. Elena?"_ She ask raising one eyebrow and eyeing the mess I have made of her immaculate kitchen.

_"Maybe, Izzy, maybe more."_ I wink grab my bikini and head for my room. Christian Grey, the troubled young genius, with a troubling past. The young man who's uncontrolled anger is unraveling him. Control, it is all about control. The dominant who has the need to control everything in their world. And the submissive who needs only to control everything within them self, abandoning all control of the world beyond. Christian Grey needs to learn to control what is within, I will teach him.

My rooms my glorious rooms. Even after twelve years it still seems a dream. There are definitely advantages to having money. I met Edgar Lincoln, Linc, heir to the Lincoln Lumber dynasty, at Harvard. He was there both on merit and on money. I was there strictly on merit.

I was born near the D. My parents were from the suburbs. We were the working class poor. I was smart, always, I was double promoted twice. I was nine years old and about to start eighth grade. Then my life started to change. A school counselor suggested a therapist to help me adjust. Still, consider a rich man's folly, there were few choices for therapists My parents took me to a highly recommend shrink, and they joined the parents group. Thank God for automobile industry insurance. The shrink was in an upscale neighborhood, my parents made influential friends.

I was soon going to a prestigious private school, on a full scholarship. That life required disciple and control. I carried a full load of AP classes, got straight A's, did debate, belonged to the garden club, played a sport, every season, did ten hours a week at the boys and girls club, and drank a fifth of rum a day. I was there and I didn't belong really. I was too young and too poor. I had to prove I deserved the opportunity I was being afforded. Fundraiser, yes sir, I'd love to work as a waiter. Oh, you need someone to talk about the difference a scholarship makes, yes sir. I did it, everything that was asked.

My academic record and my seven hundred and twenty SAT score, got me into Harvard on a full ride. That and the recommendation letters from every Harvard alumni with a child at the school. One hundred and thirty in all.

Harvard broke me. I didn't fit. I was drinking too much, I was missing classes. Then I met Linc at a frat party. I don't know exactly what happened, but I woke tied to his bed. Linc took control of my life from that moment on. And he taught me how to control all that is within me. He fell in love with me, or at least he thought he did. I fell in love with the life style I had always envied. We were married six months later. That was fifteen years ago, I still love my life style. I have never loved Linc.

I am in my shower when Izzy interrupts my thoughts. _"Ms. Elena, it is 3:30 the young man's day is over at 4:00. The landscape architect you arraigned to speak will be here at 5:00 And the garden club will be here at 6:00. We will serve dinner in the gazebo at 6:45." _She starts to leave then turns back. _"They delivered a rack of dress for you to choose from, we'll go over your itinerary in the morning. I'll have it moved to your closet." _This time she does leave, I pull on a flimsy white tee, my nipples clearly visible, and the smallest pair of shorts I own, nothing else, time to torture a young man.

I scamper down to the kitchen. He is still there still working, I smile. I head out through the mud room. His eyes widen as I walk towards him. I keep control of my smirk. The bulge is back and I can see the curiosity in his eyes. Let's see how curious this kitten really is. _"It's almost 4:00. We're setting up for a garden event, so you can go. See you back here tomorrow?"_ I turn and leave before he can answer.

I really do love my home. And when I joke that wife is a job description, it's not really a joke. I manage our household and our social life. We have almost five acres and attend or host at least seventy social events a year. Our property all of it is designed and managed by me. You see the house and garden are the loves of my life. I went to Harvard to become an architect. I have my masters in landscape design. I am my only client. I really make dreams come true for a living, mine. But do you know how boring life can be when you are thirty four and have achieved all of your dreams. So I play. Will Christian Grey be my next play thing?

I wake and stretch, it is just before dawn. I pull on my sweats and running shoes. I have a route through the rolling hills of our gardens. It's a little over ten miles. It clears my head, it lightens my mood. That and the amazing food that Izzy feeds me. It keeps me off medication. Linc will be in and out of town for the next month they are working on a land deal. Till it's finished he'll spend his nights in the penthouse of his offices.

Izzy and I meet for tea in the gazebo and watch the sunrise. We have started our days like this together for the last ten years. Hiring Izzy was the best thing I ever did. We will go over my schedule, the meals for the day, any business that needs to be accomplished. I need her, she is a stabilizing force. It's a Tuesday there is little on the agenda, my training session, then I have a Mani/Pedi, I need to pick out dresses for five events in the next six weeks. And decide on which of several invitations to accept for the fourth of July weekend. And finally, dinner, with Linc and the board of directors over a land lease. Good, that leaves my schedule free from about ten until five. I smirk thinking about playing with Christian. How far can I push him?

I feel amazing, then again I always feel amazing after a lifting session. My trainer teases me about being a beast machine. I like to lift and I lift heavy. But Izzy keeps enough calories in my diet so I am a little soft. At five feet eleven and one hundred fifty pounds I am not model thin, but my body fat is low, only eighteen percent. Just enough to have curves. I am a form junky, if I can't do it right I have reached failure. If I can't lift it correctly eight time for three sets it is too heavy. If I can do three sets of fifteen correctly the weight is to light. Simple. I like simple. I like rules and order. I like black and white, shades of grey are dangerous.

I look in the mirror. I look perfect. Simple green t-shirt dress and black strappy wedges. Nothing else. Subtle make up except for the red gloss lips. My nails once again perfect red ovals. When I enter the garden I see him. He is working on the last of the rubble. His shirt is off, he is glistening in the early light of the day. He looks up, he smiles, he is glad I am here.

In my heels I am almost six foot four, I tower over him. As I approach his eyes focus on the ground and a faint color crosses his cheeks.

_"Did you like what happened yesterday?" _His feet fidget, his blush is deeper but he doesn't answer.

_"Christian, look at me,"_ he lifts his eyes and meets my gaze. I repeat my question. _"Did you like what happened yesterday?" _My voice is much sterner.

He doesn't drop his eyes but he still doesn't answer. I slap him, it raises a red hand print on his cheek. He hasn't moved, he hasn't fled yet. _"You will answer me when I ask you a question. Do you understand?"_

Still no answer. I slap him again. _"Do you understand?"_ He answers through clenched teeth _"Yes"_

_"Now my first question again. Did you like what happened yesterday?"_ His teeth still clenched he manages a _"yes"_ I grab his chin and kiss him. His jaw is tight his mouth closed. I can feel his expectation, he knows. He fights with himself as I tease his lips nibbling, sucking, pulling at them. As soon as he surrenders and kisses me back. I slap him. He is hard as a rock, his erection pushed up against my thigh.

_"If you want me to fix that take off your boots and follow me, barefoot. Do you understand?_" He is just staring at me, shocked. I slap him, grab his chin look him straight in the eyes _"Do you understand?" _His voice almost fails as he stammers _"yes" _

I turn and head down the path towards the gazebo. It is not long before I hear the soft tread of bare feet behind me. He slows as he nears me. I can feel the nervousness radiating off of him. I reach the gazebo, and stop near the center. When I turn around he has entered the gazebo his eyes are once again cast down on his feet. He is a natural at this. He stops in front of me without lifting his eyes. I wait a moment.

_"Christian, look at me."_ He lifts his eyes to meet mine. _" Do you want me to tell you what I am going to do to you? Or would you rather just follow directions?"_ He doesn't answer right away but I can see he is trying to decide. Finally, he answers_ "I'll follow directions._"

_"Good, remove the rest of your clothing."_ I smile, step back, lean against a support post and watch. He seems shy, almost timid. Not at all what I expected. He unbuttons his fly, slowly, dropping his pants. He starts to turn away. _"Christian, I want to look at you."_ He turns back and slides his boxer briefs over his hips freeing his erection. His cock is beautiful, it arcs out slightly from his body, it is pink at the base, the head is deep dusky rose, there is a small white pearl leaking from the tip. I want to taste him but restraint is in order and I have learned plenty of self control.

_"Christian, I want you to kneel on that black line." _He lowers himself to the floor, his hand rest naturally on his knees, his eyes are cast down. Perfect. I untie the rope from the pole I am leaning against. I lower the bar to just above his head.

_"Christian, grab the bar above your head."_ He looks up, reaches up and grabs the bar. I pull the rope raising the bar. It pulls him up, he moves gracefully to his feet, stretching his body out. He is balancing on the balls of his feet. I stop just before he would be truly uncomfortable.

_"Christian, we are going to practice self control. You are going to hang on to that bar. I am going to perform oral sex on you. You are not to cum until I tell you to. If you cannot control yourself I will punish you. And then we will start over. Do you understand?"_ This time he answers quickly _"Yes"_

I walk slowly towards him. I pull up the hem of my skirt as I move forward. His erection is flexing, bobbing, this is going to be easy. I slowly reveal my entire body. His breath is slightly ragged. I kneel in front of him. I run the tip of my tongue along the length of his shaft, swirl it around the head capturing the pearly white liquid leaking from the tip. I hear his swift intake of breath, I look up never releasing him. His eyes are round, his face registers shock.

_"Christian, has anyone ever done this to you before?"_ He buries his head in his arm but he doesn't release the bar. I can barely hear his answer _"no" _I am so thankful for Linc's training, my face does not betray me. It is my turn to be shocked. _"Okay, you are really not prepared for what I am asking of you. Relax, just let me do this. Do not try to control anything. I will not punish you after this. I promise. This is just for you. Watch what I am doing to you. Enjoy the view." _

I resume what I started. I am going to make this time fun. I cup his balls cradling them in my hand, gently tracing over the soft skin with a single red nail. Cradling him, I start with my tongue at the base again. I repeat the exact same, motion. I run the tip of my tongue up these entire length of his shaft circling the head and capturing the tip, instead of holding him there, I suck him in, plunging his entire length into me. I slowly pull back releasing him. His face is once again buried in his arm. He is moaning. I lavish the same torturous delight twice more. Then I fall in to a steady rhythm, sucking him in deeply, swirling my tongue as I pull back. His hips are jerking he is losing control. I let his motions set the pace, finally he is simply fucking my mouth. The whole thing takes less then two minutes. I feel him pass the point of no return, I capture just the head against my tongue swallowing, milking it. As it slows I draw more and more of him in. He is shuttering and jerking. I have shattered him, driven him beyond all control. I let his soft cock slide from between my lips.

He is still hanging on the bar. I am proud of him. He didn't let go, he didn't grab my head and try to take control. I knew he wouldn't last, he had no clue what was about to happen to his body. He has probably fantasized about this, but with no experience. I lean up. I whisper _" I am not going to slap you."_ And I kiss him, when he responds I let him lead, when he pulls away, I let him go. He whispers _"Thank you"_

Fondling his cock as I talk, he is already becoming erect. I am standing very close to him. I can feel the body heat radiating off him. The only point of contact between us being my hand. _"Christian we're going to start again. Instead of you having to be anxious about how long you need to maintain control. I am going to put a five minute sand timer where you can see it. Then I am going to start again. If you cum before the sand runs out. I am going to punish you. Are you sure you still want to do this?"_

His answer is tortured almost pleading. _"Please" _I retrieve the timer from the game cabinet. I love this gazebo. No one would ever guess the true purpose of its design. Every useful toy seems benign. The bars hanging from the ceiling hold lighting at night, every thing from lanterns to chandeliers. The timers are for games, my games, but also charades or pictionary. The blindfold, well pinatas or pin the tail on the donkey. The ping-pong paddles. All innocent, or at least they seem that way.

I set the glass on the floor starting the sand. It is just far enough behind where I kneel for him to see clearly. I begin again. I can feel time in my bones. It is practiced, controlled, learned. I know the exact moment that glass will run out of sand. I run my tongue along his shaft, licking, nibbling, teasing, I circle the head playing, catching every bit of pearly liquid. I hear every moan, every groan, every sharp intake of breath. His cock is pushing against my mouth trying to gain entrance. When we reach the two minutes mark I draw him in. I grab his butt with both hands, holding him still. Taking him deep, I milk his cock, with my throat, a rolling pulsing rhythm, an inward pulling motion. I can hear his moans deepen they are almost pained. And then it happens. It's one word but it is surrender, _"please" _barely audible truly pleading. We are at the three minute mark.

I start a punishing rhythm, I hold him still, fucking him with my mouth, I keep the suction tight pulling him in, scraping lightly with my teeth on the release. He's on the edge, just a little push and he will be flooding my mouth again. Four minutes, I am going to let him think he may make it. I change my rhythm just enough to back him down. Once again I pulse my throat as I work, his moans are wrenching, four minutes forty, I lift my right hand, four minutes fifty it comes crashing back down. Christian is pushed as deeply into me as is possible. His cock is pulsing. I win. His hands come down on my shoulders stabilizing him. He is shaking weak. I release him from my mouth and he sinks to his knees in front of me. I leave him to recover. .

I return from the bar with two glasses of water. He is still kneeling, his hand are on his spread knees, and he is gazing at the floor. I kneel directly in front of him. My knees are together, my back is straight and my head is up. _"Christian, look at me." _He raises his eyes and looks into mine. Those soft grey eyes, are filled with both hunger and fear. I hand him a glass of water. _"Drink, you need this, you know we're not finished right?"_ He is guzzling the water but he nods his head. I refill our glasses.

We kneel silently while I let him recover. My free hand trails my nails over my body, it is a habit comforting to me. Almost always distracting to the men in my presence. Christian is no exception. I see his cock start to stir. It is time to take the next step. I have no fear of him running, I didn't run from Linc. He won't run from me.

I lower the bar back down, I have him grasp it. This time I raise the bar until Christians arms are fully extended, his body and thighs are straight and his knees are firmly planted on the floor. I kneel beside him, I take his cock in my hand, it jumps. I begin stroking at what I know is a maddeningly slow pace. He is now fully erect. It's time to start. _"Christian, I am going to spank you for your lack of control. I am going to spank you ten times for coming before the time expired, and four times for releasing the bar without permission. Then, I will turn the timer over, and we will try again. Do you understand?" _He takes a deep breath I can feel him steel himself. "_Yes_" If he expected me to release his cock he was mistaken. Until the relationship between pain and pleasure is clearly established he will not be punished without simultaneous pleasure

I continue to stroke his cock, slowly, just enough to keep him fully erect and bobbing. I start by running my nails lightly over his ass, tickling, playing, arousing him more. I slap him twice playfully. He knows they were light, he has felt more stinging blows to his face. My other hand never stops its relentless jerking of his cock. I run my nails over the soft pink hand prints. Eliciting a soft moan from him. I rain four swift hard blows to his butt. Then rake my nails over the deep red hand prints leaving long red trails in their wake. A cry escapes, his erection never weakens.

I massage the bright red prints on his ass. It is both comforting and painful. It spreads the heat but also intensifies it. Again I administer four quick hard blows. His teeth are clench, his body is taught, I can feel the tension building in him. This time I run my nails lightly over him, eliciting soft mewing noises. The next two blows are soft. I make another set of trails with my nails. The last two blows are fast and solid. I release his cock. I move around behind him and begin to sooth the throbbing in his ass with my mouth.

I am sure if I reached around his cock would be still fully erect spilling a stream of pre-cum. I trace the lines left by my nails with my tongue. Suckling, kissing, licking, eliciting soft pleading moans. I run my nails lightly over his butt on more time. I turn the timer and lay on my side in front of him. I have no intention of punishing him again. This time I spend the entire five minutes teasing him, refusing him entrance to my mouth. When the sand expires, I take him in allowing him to fuck my face, till he releases. I release his soft cock. I stand, grab my dress, _"there is still a lot of work in the garden"_ is all I say as I leave. He is still holding onto the bar. Spent.


	4. Chapter 2 - Linc's scene

I have watched Christian discreetly for the last three days. He has shown up and worked. Done exactly as expected. Every time the mud room door has opened his gaze has jumped. Looking, expectantly hoping it is me. The next time he sees me will be very public. His parents have graciously offered to host the Boys and Girls club father's day fundraiser at their home. Linc and I will attend. Men have it so lucky, shower, shave, throw on a Tux and they're ready.

It is almost noon, Izzy breaks my thoughts._ "Elena, Josh brought your car around. Your due at the salon in twenty minutes."_ This day is full. I will be prepared at the salon, waxed and tweezers within an inch of my life. My hair will lay smooth to my headband then cascade down my back and loosely over my shoulders in soft curls. My makeup will be intense, my eyes practically glowing. I skip on my way out. I do love the details of my life.

I am running exactly on schedule. I sit on the balcony of my closet. Izzy has set out a lite meal, Cobb salad, and a tall glass of iced tea. My stylist Janie will be here in less than an hour. I will meet Linc at the penthouse at 6:15. The event begins at 8:00.

We're done. I stand at the mirror making one last check. The dress is one I chose earlier this week. The fabric is a soft floral print. It's a halter style, the neck plunges deep stopping just short of exposing my belly button, the back drapes low, exposing the small of my back. The skirt is flared floating above mid thigh. My shoes are flat white gladiator sandals, they weave up my entire calf, ending in a bow just below my knee. A series of platinum chains hang in the plunge drawing attention. Linc hates these events, I know the cost of his attendance. I am dressed for Linc. He will be pleased.

I ride in the back, Josh is driving and the divider is up. I am alone with my thoughts. I know this routine. I go over it in my mind. My body knows what is expected of it. My belly is growing tight, I am hot and wet. Linc will be pleased. Josh pulls into the underground garage. He opens my door. It is 6:10._ "Josh we will be ready to leave at 7:15. Please make sure the bar is stocked. You know Linc will want a drink."_

I enter the code in the elevator panel. The door opens into the penthouse. I tread quietly to Linc's office. He shouldn't be here yet but I am still careful. I slide open the door. The room is empty. I light the candle, pour the brandy and set it in the warming stand. This is Linc's scene, I know my role and I play it well. My labia are already slick with my juices. I kneel next to his chair. My knees spread, my hands resting in the small of my back, my eyes on the floor.

I wait, it is eight minutes exactly. Linc enters the room. He sits in his chair, and props his feet on the foot stool. I move around to the end of the stool. I untie first his right shoe, place one hand and on the heel the other on the tongue and gently remove it. I tuck it nearly under the edge of the side table. I repeat the action with his left shoe. I take off both of his socks. I fold them together and tuck them in his right shoe. I return to the end of the foot stool and massage his feet. He watches me slowly sipping his brandy. He finishes, I know what is next.

Linc stands beside the foot stool. I kneel up in front of him, I undo his brown belt, slowly I pull it out. I lay out carefully over the foot stool. Then I undo his pants, unzipping them slowly, I allow them to slide down his legs. I fold them carefully, laying them on the seat of the chair. I kneel again removing his boxers with the same care. He is semi hard in anticipation. I stroke him, raking my nails along his shaft. He hardens, I capture him with my mouth working him hard. He taps my shoulder. I stand, carefully untie the perfect Windsor knot and lay his tie next to his belt on the foot stool. I unbutton his shirt letting my nails play in the opening. I slide it off his shoulders. I fold it and place it in the pile. Linc simply points to his desk. It is mahogany, long and wide. Built in to one end is a magazine rack, innocent enough, but I know better.

I lay over the end of his desk stretching my arms so my hands are gripping the far edge. Linc, grabs both of my wrists pulling hard he uses his tie to secure them to the rack. I am on my tip toes, my pubic bone rests against the edge of the desk. Linc, pulls my skirt up over my ass. He has decided not to undress me. I am exposed, covered only by a thin scrap of silk. He pulls down my thong over my thighs to the point that it digs in, then he kicks my feet apart. He runs his hand roughly over my ass, then plunges a finger into me. I shudder, flexing around him. He removes it just as quickly. I feel empty. I hear him sucking his finger.

He snaps it once, it is a distinctive sound. I pull on my restraints, I shudder, I bite my lip. The next crack is the sound of his belt landing across my ass. It will have raised a wide red welt, there will be a fine purple line. I am on fire, the heat spreads. I am still wetter, I just want him too touch me. To relieve my ache. I don't dare beg. I flex my cheeks trying to relieve the fire, when the next blow lands, crashing pain through me, it overlaps the first, the red swatch on my ass will be wider, and I will have a second purple stripe. He lands four more before I cry out. He stops the belt, raining down twenty hard blows with his hand. Sobs are racking my body. But not a tear has fallen. He walks around the desk. He extends his hand. It is the one he just reddened me with. I kiss the palm, languishing my tongue over it, sucking his fingers.

He returns too the other end of the desk. He massages my inflamed cheeks. It is torturous, I wiggle, just a little, he swiftly brings his hand down again, raining another ten quick blows. Now I am begging, pleading for him to relieve the ache. He enters me, he is brutal, this is not for me, it is for him. He wraps his hand in my hair pulling my head back, stretching me even more. He fucks me hard and fast. He doesn't allow me to cum. He pulls out, gently slaps my ass, and pulls up my thong. He unties my wrists and releases me. He shaves and cleans up in the bathroom.

He intends for me to suffer. Sitting will be painful, I am wet, needy and on edge. He will purposely squeeze my ass as we dance. He will make me wait till we get home for relief. I pull myself together. When he comes out I dress him carefully. I tie his bow tie, put in his cuff links, and hold his jacket for him. At 7:15 exactly, we exit the elevator and enter the car. We are on our way to the Grey estate.

Grace and Carrick are perfect hosts. Charity events are a specialty. Grace has an amazing team. They host at least five charity events a year. Each theme so perfect. We have donated time at two of our properties for the auction tonight. And I have personally have put up fifty hours of landscape design. I may not work for a firm but my gardens are famous.

We are seated with four other couples. Two of them are board members of Lincoln Lumber and their spouses. One is the head of the zoological society and his wife, and the last is Christians current therapist. He specializes in some new shit know as Gestalt therapy. I tried it, I found it to be a joke. I simply cannot imagine Christian yelling and beating a pillow. No I bet he hates this guy.

Sitting is excruciating. Each movement sends both a new round of pain and spreads the fire in my abdomen. I can't wait for dinner to be over. Actually I can't wait for this night to be over. I want to be back at the penthouse, I want to earn my relief.

Finally the plates are cleared. Carrick takes the microphone and thanks us all for attending. At $100,000 a plate he should say thank you. He introduces a young man to speak about the difference the boys and girls clubs make. It takes me back, I reach over and take Linc's hand and squeeze it. He knows my past, he knows this reminds me of where I come from. Brings back the feelings of not belonging. He moves his arm around my shoulder and pulls me close. It is a rare tender moment between us.

Carrick and Grace start the dancing, they look so in love. Linc pulls me from my chair and into his arms. He loves holding me, moving against my body. He loves that his wife takes exquisite care of herself. He loves showing me off. But does he love me, no I don't think so. Maybe the illusion of me. I don't think Linc really loves anyone but Linc. I love my life, and am more than willing to provide the illusion of a loving wife. But, I don't love Linc, never have. Belong to him, desire him, live for him, yes, love him no.

We have danced three dances when his phone rings. He steps out of the tent to take the call. I head over to the bar, I have a feeling it's not good news. When Linc finds me he kisses my forehead, and apologizes. He is off to solve some issue with the project in South America. Some thing about protesters. He'll be home next week.

I down my rum and coke and get another. Instead of finishing with my husband. I will be alone. Not that I can't take care of myself. It's just that I've been primed for something else. I watch the room. I can't say my goodbyes before the auction. Christian is drinking at the other end of the bar. I have caught him watching me several times. Let's see if I can make him crazy and solve my problem.

Elliott Grey has a sweet thing in his arms. She is crushed against him, being moved deftly across the dance floor. He has filled out nicely, grown into a towering man. He built the pergola, over the path to my pond, the summer he was sixteen. His love of construction evident even then. Under my supervision he learned a lot. He has his own construction company now. At nineteen he is already a millionaire in his own right. The girl is luckier than she knows. I watch them for a few minutes. I walk over tap Elliott's shoulder._"Mind if I cut in?" _

The young woman relinquishes Elliott to me, mouthing later. He pulls me into his arms. I lean into him, resting my head on his shoulder. Just as I suspected, he is already fully aroused. _"Evening Elena, Linc leave you to your own devices already?"_ His voice is snarky, he is inviting me to play. I already planned to. I push up on my toes, rub over his body, to whisper in his ear. It looks innocent enough, it is not. _"Boathouse after the auction."_ I feel him stiffen against me. I know he will be there waiting. I dance with several more of the young men who have worked in my gardens. I feel Christian watching. If he wants to dance he'll have to ask. I know he won't.

The lights are already on in the Boathouse when I arrive. I know where I will find him. I climb the stairs to the loft. He kneels to the right of the stairs, naked, his hands rest on his thighs, his eyes fixed on the floor. He is again fully erect.

_"On your back on the floor."_ I bark. He obeys. The confusion clear on his face. I am sure he expected me to want to play. I don't bother to undress, no sub has ever seen marks on my body, its not time to change that. I straddle him backwards, I don't want to see his face, I just want to fuck him. Pulling my thong aside I bury him deep with one stroke. I impale myself on him, riding him with out restraint. It doesn't take long, he doesn't get to cum before I collapse in a shuttering heap across his legs. He is still hard inside of me. I feel him move, then his hand pushes up my skirt. I hear his sharp intake of breath.

_"You fucking bitch."_ His hand comes down hard on my ass. I cry out, bite my lip, and try to gain my control. _"You let someone do this, then you come to me. Use me as a toy for relief. How dare you!"_ He rolls me off him with his legs. Before I can move, he is on me. Hauling me up, dragging me to the couch. He pulls me down over his legs. His hand comes down hard before I can prepare. I have never been submissive with anyone but Linc. All my training kicks in. I bite my lip. I hold perfectly still. His hand come down, again and again. My tears are streaming, then he is kneading my butt, squeezing, pinching. I cry out.

He pushes me to the floor, _"Get your ass in the air"_ he commands. I move scurrying into position. He places one hand on my hip, the other in the small of my back, arching me even further. Then he is thrusting into me, he is fucking me hard. Fucking me for himself, I am climbing, the heat claiming me. I am going to come apart for him. I am going to shatter. _"That's it climb for me bitch. Roll those hips, oh ya, that's it."_ His hand slams into me again. I explode, throbbing, pulsing over him, coating him. He explodes and collapses on top of me. My breathing is still ragged when he pulls out, rolls off of me, grabs his clothes and leaves. I lay on the floor for a long time. Finally, I pull myself together.

I call Josh to bring the car around, it will be a long ride home. When Grace calls tomorrow, I'll blame a headache for slipping out quietly. Next I call Izzy and ask her to fill my bath. Izzy knows the rigors of my life. She knows the toll an evening out with Linc takes on my body. She will care for me tonight. Should I tell Izzy what happened with Elliott?

Izzy is going over my day. I am zoning it is a Monday. Then one of the messages I need to return grabs my attention._ "Izzy, what was that one?"_

_"Mr. Elliott Grey wants to set up a meeting. He bought your services at the auction. He wants to go over the project."_ Her voice is calm. I am glad I didn't tell her about the Boathouse. I blush remembering. Then it strikes me, he bought the time before the Boathouse. I was drinking through the auction, I wasn't paying attention. SHIT!

_"Izzy, call his offices set up a lunch meeting later this week. Then call Janie, have her send over a few summer suits for me to choose from. I can handle the rest of the calls."_ Even to me I should tense and distracted.

I finish the dozen or so calls, return my email, and order flowers sent to my mother. It's just before noon. Izzy will have lunch set up on my closet balcony. My closet, is bigger than the bedroom I grew up in. Perfectly arranged. Janie keeps it well stocked. Most of my clothes are worn once, that's it once. Oh, I have clothes that I wear here at the house. But if I leave the grounds in it, I don't wear it again. It's one of Linc's rules. He doesn't want me photographed in the same thing twice. Linc's rules, God if he found out Elliott spanked me. He would be so mad. He tolerates the boy toys, they are my subs. But, playing with another Dom. And it wouldn't matter that I didn't plan it that way or actually consent. I shudder.

I grab a bikini, my shades, a hat and a book. I need to bake in the sun. Push all of the aches out of the me. Let go of the Boathouse. Linc doesn't need to know. I change and head for the pool. I am out the mud room door and half way to the garden before I remember he is there. He has his back to me. He is bent over fitting two teak wood timbers together. I stop watch him for a moment, then call his name. He stands up carefully, turning slowly to look at me.

_"Damn it Christian!" _He has a black eye, his cheek is split, his lip fat and he has bruises on his ribs._ "Go home your done today. Be here at 7:00 am in the gazebo. We need to talk. Barefoot! Do you understand me?"_ A blush passes over him when I mention the gazebo. He is staring at his feet fidgeting, but he manages a _"Yes"_ I stomp off to the pool, leaving him staring after me.

I wake in a much better mood. I like Tuesday, lifting day. I tell Izzy to clear my day after 7:00. She nods her head, winks, and smiles. She saw Christian yesterday, she knows I won't allow him to fight. She knows he is in for a long day.

I see him walk down the path. I check my watch. It is 6:58. He's on time. He stops outside the gazebo, takes off his shoes and socks and enters. Black sports Bra, booty shorts and black strappy stilettos is the outfit of the day. My hair is braided and wound tightly in a bun on my head. Stereotypical maybe, effective yes.

I follow him in. He is just standing there arms crossed. Relaxed, almost cocky, but his eye betray him. He's nervous, he knows I am angry. _"Strip and kneel"_ He is slower this time, he folds each piece stacking them neatly. When he's kneeling, I step in front of him, standing so all he can see is my feet, bound by my strappy shoes.

_"Christian, do you like what I do to you?"_ He starts to lift his head. I place my hand firmly holding his head down. _"No, you don't get to look at me. Answer me."_

He takes a deep breath, his teeth are clenched, _"yes"_

_"Do you want me to keep doing it?"_ I add no inflection. It is a simple question. His answer will determine wether he dresses and leaves. Or if his life changes today.

It is barely audible, _"Yes"_

_"Then, Christian, there are rules. First, you will answer me clearly. No more mumbling or whispering. Second, when you answer me you will use my name. I am not a fan of being called mistress, but you will address me with respect. Third, I will ask you a lot of questions. I will know everything about you. It is not a choice, you will answer. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes"_ his voice clear this time. I tap my toe impatiently._ "Yes Elena"_ I run my fingers through his hair.

_"Christian, look at me."_ He raises his eyes to meet mine _"We have a lot to discuss, there is a blanket and a basket down by the pond. That's where we are going to talk. But before then. I want to spank you. Not to punish you, but simply to do so. I want you edgy, horny with your ass on fire. But this time it is up to you. I won't punish you later for saying no. May I spank You?"_

His eyes drop, his hands fidget_ "yes"_ it is both to soft and incorrectly phrased. I slap his face hard. _"Yes Elena"_ loud and clear.

_"Kneel up. Put one hand on the back of your neck. Your going to jerk yourself with the other this time. I want to see how you handle your own cock."_ His face has paled, he is timid at first._ "Do you want this to turn into a punishment? Do as you were told."_ Good, he is following directions. _"Now remember the point is to keep yourself hard, do not lose you erection, but do not cum."_ I kneel beside him. I place my left hand on his hip to stabilize him. I rest the Palm of my right on his ass. _"Christian, the point of this spanking is color. So I am going to hit you a lot. But I won't be using as much force." _He is biting his lower lip. That habit is going to get him in trouble, just not right now.

I bring my palm down twenty quick times, it has raised a fair amount of color. His breathing is heavy, raspy , he is still handling his cock. I am running my nails over his bright pink ass. I watch him. He is a player, he enjoys himself, he stops fondles his balls, pinches the head. Jerks it some more. I bring my hand down twenty more times, this time he moans. When I finish I use my nails to rake an x on each cheek. I move so I am in front of him. _"Stop, put your other hand behind your neck."_ He moves immediately. I grab his chin and kiss him. He tries not to surrender. Soon he is kissing me back, I know he expects met to slap him. I don't. _"You did well. Follow me."_ He starts to grab his clothes. I say one word _"No!"_ He follows me treading quietly naked through the garden.

The blanket is spread by the pond. I lay on my side. Pat the ground on the opposite side of the blanket. _"Kneel here"_ Christian obeys without hesitation. _"Christian, this is a conversation. We are not playing now although I will continue to give you directions, you may speak freely. I expect honest answers even if you don't think it is what I want to hear. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_

_"First, I am going to ask a lot of very personal, very explicit, questions. I need honesty, it's important."_ After, the other day l am sure he lacks an real sexual experience but I am going to make him answer.

_"Other than with me, have you ever given or received oral sex with a girl."_

_"No Elena"_

_"Have you ever given or received oral sex with a male."_

_"No Elena"_

_"Other than me has anyone ever handled your cock?"_

_"Stop Elena, the answer to all your fucking stupid questions is no. I'm a virgin. A fucking freak who can't stand to be touched. I haven't ever touched a girl, your the only one I have seen naked. What more do you want."_

_"A lot but that's a start."_ I take a deep breath and reach for the basket. It will be filled with small bits of food. Cheese, fruit, bread all of it prepared perfectly. Thank you Izzy. I remove a small container. I take out a grape and pop it in my mouth. The second I run over Christians lips. He doesn't open his mouth._ "When I feed you, you will eat."_ He opens his mouth and takes the grape. I feed us each a few grapes and pieces of cheese. When finish. I put the container away.

_"There are rules your going to need to follow if we're going to do this. You understand that right?"_

_"Yes Elena"_

_"You called yourself a freak who can't be touched. I have clearly touched you. My hand print are currently on your ass. So, explain."_

_"Elena, you haven't really touched me. You've slapped and grabbed my face, you have kissed my mouth, worked my cock, and spanked my ass. Other than that you haven't so much as brushed against me."_ He runs his hand through his hair._ "Close contact that didn't make me jump or cringe. Yes I want more. No matter the price."_

_"Okay, so there are places you don't like to be touched. We should talk about that. I don't want to push you where your not ready to go. So where can't I touch you?"_

_"Most of my upper body. I don't know exactly I jump when anyone comes close."_ He visibly shudders at the thought.

_"Are you ready for the basic rules?"_ He's revealed more than I expected.

_"Yes Elena"_

_"There is absolutely no fighting. You are not allowed to participate in any activity that may result in damage to your body. You will be in bed by ten pm Sunday through Thursday. You will be here to run with me at 5:00 am Monday through Friday. You will eat properly. You will keep a log of your eating, sleeping and exercise. You will keep it on you and hand it over when ever I ask. Do you understand and agree?"_

_"Yes Elena, I understand. I am just not sure ten pm is reasonable. And I eat a lot a junk."_

_"None of those were negotiable. None of the rules I set for you are. Do I expect that you will be perfect. No I do not. But, I will punish you for your failures. I want you to lay on your back"_ he moves stretching. I have kept him kneeling a long time for a newbie.

_"Let's start with safe words. Safe words are used for when you are close to or have reached your limit. In general safe words only apply to your physical discomfort. In the case of areas you do not want to be touched they can be used for emotional discomfort. If you say yellow I will know you are nearing your limit. If you say red every thing stops immediately. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_

_"Christian, I am really angry about the condition of your face. I know I hadn't set the rules yet. But fighting is never allowed."_ I straighten my legs and spread my thighs slightly. _"Christian, l want you to come here and lay face down over my legs."_ I grab the lube from the basket. I generously coat his cock. He lays over me. I position him so his cock is trapped between my thighs. _" Now I am going to spank your ass for fighting. And I am going to continue to spank you until you manage to cum. Do you understand?"_

He takes a deep breath, _"yes Elena"_ he pushes between my thighs and moans. My hand comes down hard. I rain ten hard blows. He gasps, moans his ass jumps trying to avoid the blows. I rest my palm on his ass. The x' s I scraped with my nails barely visible. I massage his now bright hot ass. I let him fall into a rhythm against my thighs. I can feel him getting close. I bring my hand down again, I rain ten more hard blows. It breaks his rhythm. He cries out. I tickle my nails over his now shiny hot skin. He is back in a rhythm climbing again. I pinch his already sore butt, he yelps and jumps. I slap him again. We are at thirty now. I am going to push to fifty. I don't want him to be able to move without remembering. He is back in the rhythm I can feel sobs moving through him, but I can also feel him coming close. I smack him again, only one more set to go. I can feel the heat radiating off his ass before I make contact. I trail my nails along his crack, the only white area between the two glowing cheeks._ "Please"_ escapes his lips. I rain the last ten swats. I blow cool air across his very hot ass as he finishes. He comes with a shudder. He is exhausted, his face tear stained. Gently, pulling my legs out, I let him recover where he lays.

_"Were done for today. Go home. Do not masturbate. I will see you in the morning."_ I stand and leave. It is not yet noon.

.


	5. Chapter 3 - Punishment Earned

I wake early, stretching, I smile. It's just after 4:00 am. Will he arrive on time. I am sure he will be here. He can't stay away. I am anxious for him to be here, this is new. With Linc I am anticipatory, scared, and nervous; excited, angry and aggressive with the subs. But, this is different, I can't wait to see him, I moisten at the thought of him, not what I am going to do to him, simply him. For the first time I wonder if this is how Linc felt when he met me.

I know him, I know him well. I have lived in his skin. I know that dark place he is in. I hold it deep within, controlled, encased, chained by complete discipline and self control. Not fitting, not belonging, surrounded by beautiful perfect people, with beautiful perfect lives, scarred and ugly, carrying rage so close to the surface, it crawls just under your skin.

I pull on my sweats, sports bra and Nikes. I am waiting in the garden at exactly 5:00 am. Christian has not arrived. I am actually happy, I get to punish him. He is going to learn. He comes sauntering up the path, it is 5:07. _"Christian,Your late!"_ I sound angry, hell I am angry. Time is simple, your on time or your not. There is no grey area. _"Just a few minutes no biggie."_ His reply is snarky. I slap him._ "Late, is late. You will be punished after breakfast for both your tardiness and insolence. Can you run ten miles?"_

His eyes are cast down and again his feet fidget. _"Yes Elena"_ well that's better he has got the hang of answering me. _"Take off your shirt, shoes and socks. Christian, unless your working in the garden I expect your feet and chest to be bare."_ He removes the items I requested without hesitation. _"Christian, this is a run. I run in silence. I expect you to do the same. Match my pace and stay beside me."_ I start at an easy jog to warm up. Then I run hard. I push my own endurance. He is breathing hard. As we cross the eight mile mark I let up. He won't make it if I don't. I have never shared my run. Whatever possessed me yesterday, I still don't understand. Normally, I simply would have ordered exercise and assigned a trainer. I ordered him to run with me and not just today but every week day.

Our run ends at the kitchen garden._ "Christian, Josh and Gideon are in the kitchen. Izzy has breakfast laid out. Go in and eat. I will be there in an hour. Wait for me."_

I head to the gazebo at a jog. Izzy is walking down the opposite path carrying our breakfast. I open the covered bowl, I was right my favorite. Steel cut oats and mincemeat compote. Izzy goes over my correspondence, my calls and finally my appointments. Crap I have a 1:00 lunch with Elliott Grey. Well, Que sera sera. There is nothing that can't wait till after lunch. Perfect. Just perfect, punish Christian, then face Elliott. I am one fucked up chick, as Izzy would say. But then she would laugh and hug me.

Christian is perched on one of the stool around the breakfast bar. He is talking sports with Josh and Gideon. All three mens heads snap, to look at me, when I clear my throat. _"Christian, follow me."_ I lead him up the stairs to my suite. My seven rooms make up half of the third floor. Two bedrooms, two baths, my closet, den, and playroom.

I lead him first into my subs bedroom. It is small, white, almost sterile. There is a bed, a desk and chair, a wardrobe and a dresser. _"When your here at the house. This is your room. There is a computer which is for your use." _The bathroom is attached. He spends a great deal of time just staring at all the different hoses, fountains and spigots. This room is completely marble, everything that can be damaged by water is behind a sealed door. The tub is sunken into the floor. The shower is attached, three steps up, it is an open platform with several benches._ "Christian, this room is part of our play area. I don't want to scare you. The only thing you need to know for now is that I like water. I like playing with it."_

It's time, time for him to see what he has really gotten himself into. He follows me back out into the hall. I stop in front of my play room door. _"Christian, when we go in to this room you are probably going to be shocked. I am going to punish you for this mornings errors. Do you understand me?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ he takes a deep breath. I punch in the keycode and open the door. I hear his sharp intake of breath. Most doms prefer goth and mid evil themes, it is just not me. The wood in this room is light maple, the leather navy blue, and the rest is shades of pink. The walls are decorated with the implements of the trade. The paddles hang from pink and navy ribbons. The canes lay across porcelain pegs, each with a hand painted rose. A trellis decorates one of the walls, from it hangs all methods of restraint. There is what appears to be a built in jewelry case on the opposed wall, the knobs are porcelain, each painted with a pansy. It's contents are darker, forbidden, taboo.

I point at the tall, wide bench _"Christian, go lean over that bench. I am going to gather the supplies we need."_ He is moving to the bench, without hesitation, I smile. _"I am going to punish you. This is going to be exceedingly painful. I expect you to take your punishment. You have broken a rule and been disrespectful. You know the safe words. This is your first, real punishment, I will be disappointed if you choose to use them."_

He is leaning over the bench, resting his upper body on his elbows. I walk in front of him. First I hold up a two inch wide, black leather strap._ "Christian, look at me."_ His eyes meet mine. His face is turbulent. _"Christian, you were late, seven minutes late to be exact. I am going to strike you with this belt. Once for each minute you were late."_ Then I hold up a large oval flat leather paddle._ "You were insolent and snarky when corrected. I am going to strike you ten times with this paddle for that."_ Last I hold up a pair of leather cuffs. There is no explanation needed. I secure first one wrist then the other. I pull his arms taunt, securing them spread, to the legs of the bench. It pulls him up onto his tip toes. He cannot lift his chest off the bench, his legs although extended are not restrained. I want him to get used to restraint. He is letting his head hang.

_"Christian, I told you to look at me."_ His eyes come back up too meet mine. _"When I finish, I am going to release your wrists. I am not going to speak to you or comfort you. I am going to leave and lock you in this room. I will be back at exactly 12:00. During that time. I expect you to look at every thing in this room. It was purchased specifically for you. Any item you object to is to be placed in the box next to the door. When I return I expect to find you kneeling next to the box completely naked. Do you understand?"_

He is pulling at his restraint. _"Yes ma'am"_ I slap his face._ "Ma'am is not any more acceptable, than mistress is. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_

I jerk his sweats down to his knees. His briefs are next. I pull them down, so his entire package is exposed. The band running right under his balls and framing the lower edge of his cheeks. I could have been gentle, but there is a point to punishment. It is not the simple pain that changes behavior. It is the whole process. The humiliation, the lack of control, the vulnerability. I stand there ready, I am watching him. I am letting his state settle in. I see the faint color blush over him. He flexes his butt, and pushes up on the balls of his feet.

I swing, it is hard, the sound reverberates against the walls as the belt meets his rising ass. I hear the air rush from his body. Before he can recover I bring the second blow crashing down. A sharp cry escapes. The third comes up catching right above the waist band of his briefs. Again he cries out. He can't keep still and I won't make him. He will learn in time. His ass, sways just as I bring the fourth strike down, it cuts a diagonal across the other red welts. He is gasping for air. Tears are streaming down his face. The last three swings are fast. His mouth is open in a scream but no sound is coming out. I lay the used belt across his shoulders.

I pick up the paddle, I place my hand in the small of his back. I wait, I let him catch his breath, now he is sobbing audibly. This will be easier for him with me holding him still. He has done very well, I am pleased. But he will know I mean what I say, and every error earns its own punishment. Each time this paddle lands it will intensify the heat, and make each little purple line left by the edge of the belt sing. I bring the ten blows down in less than thirty seconds. Again he can't catch his breath. I drop the paddle, free his wrists, and leave, closing the door behind me. He will need this time, he needs to reconcile this within himself.

I head into my closet. I turn on the two way mirror. He is standing, the belt in his hand, he running his fingers over it. Tears still run free down his face. I turn off the mirror and grant him his privacy. Now to get ready for lunch.

First my shower, my bathroom is exactly the same as the one off the other bedroom. I need to take care of this wet achy need. It's making me edgy. The last thing I need is to be edgy, when I see Elliott. Crap, what am I going to say to him. I close my eyes, letting the memory of punishing Christian and the water take me.

I look in the mirror, thank-you Janie. I have on a perfectly fitted cream shift dress, it stops at my trade mark mid thigh. A pink cropped jacket, it shows off my long thin torso. Five inch cream stiletto pumps. My wedding pearls hang around my neck and wrists and dangle from my ears. I hit the call button on my phone, Izzy picks up on the first ring. _"Izzy, please send Miss Janie a dozen roses from our green house. And have Josh pull Linc's Jag around". _I can almost feel her mouth hanging open. I look at the clock it is 11:55. I flip on the mirror. Christian is kneeling, his knees spread, hands resting on his thighs, eyes gazing at the floor.

I open the door at exactly noon. Christian jumps, but recovers quickly. I open the box next to him, the only item in the box are the canes. If you took my toys off the wall this room would pass for a well appointed bed/sitting room. I take a seat on the small couch, and pat the place next to me _"Christian, please join me." _He needs to stretch as he rises. He must have waited in position for a long time. He is moving slowly, each step clearly painful. When he sits next to me he can't keep the grimace off his face.

_"Christian, did you look at everything in this room?"_ My voice is sterner than I intended.

_"Yes Elena."_

_"Is there anything in here you want to know more about?"_

_"No Elena"_

_"Do you know what every thing you looked at is and how it is used?"_

_"No Elena"_

_"Why don't you want to ask about those things, before you decide if they should be in this room?"_

_"I don't need to know. After what I let you do to me today, I realized If you want to do it to me, I am going to let you. There is no need for me to know."_ He sighs deeply. I smile, he is overwhelmed with trying to control himself and the world around him. He's starting to let go.

_"Then why are the canes in there?"_

_"I saw a documentary on Chinese prisons. The flesh was ripped open. I don't want that to happen to me. It scares me. Do you want me to put them back?"_ He is looking at his fingers

_"No, I do not want you to put them back. They will be removed. You will be given the opportunity to remove things or bring things back again in six months. I am going out. You are to go to your room. I want you to soak in the tub that is prepared for you. Shower, then you are to lay face down on your bed naked. Pull just the white sheet up over you. Izzy will tend to your butt."_ I see him tense and shudder _" Do not argue with her. Do everything she says. She will not touch you in a sexual way, she will simply be caring for you at my direction. You may as well get used to her ministering to the after effects of life with me, right now. Then I want you to take a nap. I will wake you when I return. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_

_"Not doing exactly as you have been told will result in further punishment."_ I hear his sharp intake of breath.

Linc's Jag. It is his car, he loves to take it out on the coast and run it wide open. Elliott will notice. He knows, I don't drive that car. I am working my pearls between my lips, sucking them. I feel like I am wrapping Linc around me as a shield. I pull up in front of the taco stand. It is 12:58. Elliott loves this place. I grab a table. There are only three and one has seen better days. It's just off some obscure pier, behind a bait shop. I will admit the food is amazing. It's 12:03 I am tapping the face of my watch, it is an anxious habit when any thing is behind schedule. My subs know it means they are late. I don't do late.

_"I turned in my log book long ago Elena. I may take the opportunity to play now and again. But I do not follow your rules."_ His voice is deep and commanding. We order food at the window and sit down. The view here is beautiful.

_"So, you bought my design time? Izzy said you have a project in mind?"_ I am blushing.

_"Yes, actually I do. I donated my time, materials and services to a Boys and Girls club, that deserves a new facility. I want you to design the grounds. I am going to look at the property next week. I'd like you to come with me."_ His voice sounds all business. But my body is on high alert. Do I want to be alone with this man?

_"Where is the lucky boys and girls club?"_ I try to sound bored. I remember last year he redid a Ronald McDonald house. It was amazing. The medical amenities, a game room, a theater, and a bowling lane, then the play ground ground wow. He even built a real tree house. If he is really doing this I want to be on board.

_"A suburb of Detroit. Royal Oak I think. So are you interested?"_ He seems sincere. Does he know? Damnit, he wants me to go back. Go home to the boys and girls club where I volunteered. To the place where I should have been receiving services, but was giving them instead. I haven't been home since I was sixteen. I left for Harvard and I haven't gone back. Just Damnit!

_"I'll have to check my schedule. But, if you could arrange the trip for mid week before the fourth, I'll be headed to Michigan anyway, were spending the fourth on Mackinac Island. I can fly a few days early and get the project started with you."_ I pulled it off my answer was right on.

_"I should be able to do that. It's just a week later than originally planned. You sure you're good with this project. I have other projects."_ Crap, he knows.

_"Yes I'm sure"_ my voice is much steadier than I feel.

_"Now, that we're done with business. Who the hell did you let put those marks on you?"_ His voice is stern commanding. Automatically my eyes drop. I blush. Now he hisses _"If you don't want a repeat of the Boathouse right here you will answer me."_ He slams his hand down on the table for emphasis.

I jump, but I answer _"Linc"_ It's too soft too breathy lost.

_"No wonder you brought his fucking car, did you have his permission to screw me, did you need it?"_ He draws his hand through his hair and over his face_ "Shit!" _then slams it into the table again. _"I will see you in Detroit."_ He leaves abruptly.

Home, Christians waiting. I get in the car. I am on the coast highway when it hits me. Linc, Lincoln Lumber, with the size log homes Elliott is building, if Linc got pissed he'd be screwed. No wonder he's so upset.

Christian isn't in his room, I check his bathroom, not there. I go to the playroom. He is kneeling on the small sofa, he has the belt in his hand, he is running his fingers over it. I lean against the door and just watch him till he looks up. I smile, _"What are you thinking about Christian?"_ He blushes and looks down _"you"_

_"Christian, can I touch your face and the rest of your head without it bothering you?"_ I ask softly. I haven't moved. I want him to feel some control.

_"Yes, Elena"_

_"Then, I am going to sit on the long couch, I want you to lay on your back with your head in my lap while we talk. Can you do that?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ the stress in his voice is evident. He is afraid. But we will get through this.

I start by just running my nails through his hair lightly over his scalp. _"So, what were you thinking about when I came in? Remember, I expect honest and anything less is punishable."_

His voice starts out hesitant_ "I was thinking about you. I was thinking about how in control you are. How out of control I am. How all I want to know is did I make you happy. How I want you to do things to me. I want you to be pleased with me."_ He is blushing and quiet before he finishes.

_"What happens to your body when you think about what I did to you?"_ I know what I hope it's going on.

_"My cock gets hard and all I can think about is you. I want you to touch it so bad it's almost maddening."_

_"Christian, you did really well today. I am pleased with the way you submitted. If you want me to take care of your cock, it will cost you. Taking punishment well doesn't earn a reward, you earned the punishment. If you want a reward you'll have to earn that too. So, it's up to you." _My voice is soft pleasant matter of fact.

_"How do I earn it?"_

_"I want to play with your nipples and the area around them. I'll set a timer if you can tolerate five minutes. I will suck you off. Are you interested?"_

_"Yes Elena" _

I retrieve the timer. I start the sand flowing. Instead of sitting back down I straddle him. I capture his now fully erect penis between us. I reach up and run a nail around the edge of his areola. It rocks me across him. I play at first one and then the other nipple. He is pushing up against me. God, this is excruciating. Why the fuck does Christian Grey have to be a virgin. I don't even do it purposely, but at just over four minutes the edge of one my nails runs against one of his round white scars. He screams, it is raw, torn from his body, wretched from his soul. None of his cries earlier were as pained. Then he gasps _"red"_

_"Dress and go home. Do not masturbate. You will get your log tomorrow. I will see you at five." I _sound angry. I am so hot and wet I want to throw him down, and fuck him, ride him until he can't move, grinding his red raw ass into the floor. It's not time, he needs to learn control. So I need to exhibit some myself. I head for the kitchen I need to talk to Izzy.

Izzy is just finishing cooking dinner, when I walk in. I know I look disheveled, a rarity, when Linc's not home. I feel out of control, spinning. I want Linc, I need Linc. He's been so preoccupied. There is a lot going on and I know he has a new female sub he's playing with. He won't tell me, he knows I get jealous. I know it seems odd, I have subs, and I am jealous of his. But, I belong to Linc, I hate his toys. If it were a male he would have told me. I would probably be fine. It's why I know he would be furious if he knew what Elliott did to me. I belong to Linc. I am moody and petulant.

Josh and Gideon come in through the mud room they are having a loud discussion. I laugh, they are like having brothers. Josh runs my security detail and manages the cars. Of the two I would say managing my security is the tougher job. Gideon is head of grounds and maintenance. I manage all the design and construction. He keeps my vision neatly in focus. Izzy, technically she is my assistant. The reality is, she is my lifeline, and I am hers. These three people, they are my family, all of them, as broken and damaged inside as I am. All graduates of the Linc's for successful change program.

_"The program"_ as we call it. Both a legitimate well run program to help kids be successful through mentoring and paid sponsored internships. It is also a cover for both of our submissives. Lincoln Lumber provides the entire operating budget. All donations go directly to paying student mentors and interns. His are paid as staff, mine use it as a cover for their time. Both Josh and Gideon were Linc's subs till he got bored. Izzy was a pregnant teen meth head. I stayed with her while she detoxed. I held her while she delivered a drug free baby. I rocked her after she handed him into the arms of his loving parents. I celebrated with her the day she graduated. She nursed me back to health , after I ran away, and Linc carried me home, bloody, beaten and broken. There are no secrets between us.

I grab a plate of the veggie lasagna, and tuck into it. The conversation continues around me. I am still sullen and sulking. Then Josh asks _"How's the boy toy?" _I blanch, practically choking on the bite in my mouth. _"A virgin"_ I whisper, I can't even look up. It's Gideon that breaks the tension _"Still? You haven't remedied the issue? Your slipping Elena"_ Both Izzy and Josh laugh. _"He is one of us. FUBAR (fucked up beyond all repair). He's not ready. Hell, I'm not ready."_ The last admission silences the room. _"He's not just a toy is he?"_ Josh whispers. I bolt, they won't follow, they know me well, know I have to puzzle through this.

I head for the library. I need to make Christian's log. They are personal, a gift from me. I have the covers pre made. The spine, and the pages, I design and assemble. I look through the choices. Then it catches my eye. Deep grey, rough, mottled, elephant hide. I am looking at my choices for the spine, when I remember the rails from my first journal, I close the supplies drawer. I pull out my personal log. Hidden, behind it two plates, each six inches long and an inch wide. They are etched pewter, the images, woven dogwood branches, the flowers and the thorns clearly evident. I choose dove linen for the pages and a navy blue for the section dividers.

It's well past midnight when I am finished. I run my hand over the cover, I sigh, Christian Grey, please help me unravel you. I turn off the embossing machine, printer, and am about to shut the computer down for the night, when I see an instant message from Linc. Shit, it's more than an hour old.

My darling wife:

Either you left the library computer on (you didn't) or your up way past your bedtime making a book (you are). Which ever your pretty little ass is in serious trouble. I need you in DC on Friday, Izzy will have your flight information. Now go to bed.

Anxiously awaiting your arrival,

Your very angry husband.

I shut down the computer. Linc, angry Linc, not social Linc, not bored Linc, angry Linc. I smile practically dancing to my room.


	6. Chapter 4 - Christians book

I wake up, I stretch, I see it laying on my night stand. I run my hand over its rough hide. Christian's log, and I am giving it to him today. I dress quickly. I hope Izzy is in the kitchen. I have never been this excited about a log..

Most of the logs are standard issue except for the name and the actual design. Most of my young men have never made it inside. Not because they wouldn't have, but it is a very personal space. And most are just a passing fancy. There is little I can do in there that I can't do outside if I plan ahead.

Shit, Izzy isn't here yet. I leave a note on top of the log.

Izzy please put enough food for Christian and I on my plate. Put this on his. Use dish covers. We will have our meeting at lunch. Kisses

I exit the mud room door it is 4:59 am Christian is jogging up the path to the garden. I start to jog, he sprints to catch me, then he falls into step beside me. I smile and think _"gotcha." _He stays with me stride for stride the entire run. He smiles when he sees the set table as we enter the gazebo. Both of us walk till our breathing slows. I sit down, _"Christian please sit down too." _He reaches to uncover his plate, I slap his hand. _"You do not eat unless I tell you to. Do you understand?"_

His head is down. _"Yes Elena"_ it is weak and shaky, scared. _"Christian look at me."_ He raises his eyes _"I will control when and what you eat. But, I will never allow you to go hungry. Not even as punishment._ He visibly relaxes._" Now, before we eat I want you to tell me what you have done to earn punishment, already today?"_ His eyes are round, he hasn't realised yet what's wrong. And he knows I am going to punish him for whatever it is. He sits there dumbfounded. I go over to the game cabinet and take out a one minute timer. I turn it over. _"If you can't figure it out, before the sand runs out it will be a second error."_ I cross my arms and wait. He keeps looking from me to him then around the gazebo. His eyes lock on his fingers just before the sand runs out. _"Christian, remove your shirt, shoes and socks."_ His head comes up in shock, then realization. He immediately removes the offending items. And sits back down.

_"I will punish you after we finish here. You may take the cover off your plate." _He picks up his book, he runs his hand over the cover. Then he takes a single finger and traces his name embossed in pewter on the front. There is a reverence when he speaks _"Did you make this?" _I let the smile cross my lips. _"Yes, I made it specifically for you. It is very different from any other log, I have ever made. The hide is elephant, the plates that act as the spine come from the first journal I ever made for myself. Do you like it?"_

_"Yes Elena, I like it very much. Thank-you."_ I uncover my plate. I hand him one of the bowls of Greek yogurt, berries and granola. _"Christian, this is your log book. You are to have it with you at all times. When you want to stop our relationship simply return your log to me. I will remove the pages and return it filled with empty pages. See the three little screws. They hold this book together, it also allows us to edit it. Now, I am going to feed you the rest of the food on this plate. You are going to hold the book and we are going to go through it. Are you ready for this?"_

_"Yes Elena."_

When he opens the page he reads the words:

CHRISTIAN GREY

MOST CHERISHED POSSESSION OF

ELENA LINCOLN

He looks up at me, his eyes full of wonder and fear, _"Is it true"_

_"Christian, it is absolutely true. I told you I would never lie to you. There is something else about that inscription you should know. It is uniquely yours. Every other log has said property of Elena Lincoln. You do something to me Christian that I can't explain."_

He turns the page. The page is a section divider it is navy blue leather. Written in silver calligraphy is the word. OBEDIENCE

_"Christian this is the section of the book that is likely to change the most. I will add rules as you need them. These are not guidelines, these are hard rules. You will be punished for violations. I want you to read it aloud. I will feed you between each instruction" _I want him to think about each one. He turns the page and begins to read.

Code of Conduct:

Christian Grey (CG) will obey any instructions given by Elena Lincoln (EL) immediately without hesitation or reservation and in an expeditious manner. CG will agree to any sexual activity deemed for and pleasurable by EL. He will do so eagerly and without hesitation.

Failure to comply with any rule or instruction will result in punishment, the timing, nature and severity to be determined by EL.

When ordered to report to the playroom, CG will kneel to the right of the door. He will position himself with his knees spread, he will rest his palms on his knees, he will look at the floor. CG will maintain an erection at all times

CG will be honest with EL at all times. CG will answer any question EL asks.

CG will keep his feet and chest bare at all times unless doing so is hazardous to his body or is socially unacceptable.

CG Will always be on time.

CG will not drink to intoxication.

CG will not fight.

CG will follow the rules in each section of this book. CG will record all required information.

CG will record every violation of any rule written or oral and the punishment inflicted in the punishments section of the book.

CG will provide his daily schedule to Izzy by 5:00 am for approval by EL. CG will not participate in any scheduled activity deemed inappropriate by EL

CG will not have sexual contact with anyone other than EL

CG will allow Izzy to tend to the after effects of CG's and EL' s activities.

CG will produce his log immediately upon request by EL. CG will be held accountable for his log and every thing in it.

CG will not touch, fondle or otherwise sexually pleasure himself with out permission from EL

All rules apply to CG at all times whether EL is present or not.

He finishes the section. _"Do you have any questions about the code of conduct and what I expect?"_

_"No Elena" _he answer is almost monotone.

_"Christian, remove the rest of your clothing." _He hesitates but not long enough for me to call him on it. A year from now it would be punishable. When he sits back down I ask him _"Have you masturbated since you left here yesterday?"_

The expression on his face gives away the truth. But I can see him deciding how to answer _"yes Elena" _

I smile, _"Was it a punishable error?"_ He may as well start learning how in control of his life I am right now.

His eyes drop, _"Yes Elena"_

_"Christian, open your book to the next section of your book." _I am soaked, I let him see me run my hand over my breast tweaking the nipple. He is staring at the page, biting his lower lip. I want to bite that lip hard. Slap him see my hand on his face. Punish him for making me feel out of control. He doesn't expect it, I slap his face. _"I want to look at my hand print while you read this section." _He actually smiles. Something inside me sings.

The silver calligraphy reads Punishment and Sexual activities.

_"Christian, I want you to turn to the third page please. There is a pen next to your plate. Please put today's date on the top of the page. One the first line I want you to write 'covered my chest at an inappropriate time' skip three lines. On the next line write 'covered my feet at an inappropriate time' skip the lines again and write 'masturbated without permission' the first skipped line is where you will write the punishment I dictate. On the second skipped line you will rate how painful you found the punishment on a scale of 1-10, if you safe word you will write the safe word instead. A safe word is considered a 10+. Your transgressions need to be identified by date and you must keep the list current. Always remember you are to follow the rules at all times. Now turn to the first page. You are going to read and I will continue to feed you between instructions. Do you understand everything so far?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ He actually seems to be relaxing.

Punishment

Punishment, the timing, nature and severity will be at the sole discretion of EL

Discipline tools will be reviewed every six months. CG will be allowed to remove any thing from play at that time. CG May place any object that he has been subjected to in the box at any time. EL will take CG's wishes in consideration, however the item will not be excluded from use until the end of the current six month period. CG is encouraged to research and request the purchase of implements, tools and toys.

CG will be punished on any portion of his body, with the exception of his chest, starting three inches above his belly button to his neck. His nipples, areola, and 1 inch surrounding them may be subject to punishment. No flesh to flesh contact will occur during punishment to CG's upper body. EL's nails are acrylic so are not subject to exclusion.

He looks terrified. I know it is not the punishment itself, but that I have taken away his comfort zone.

Safe words:

With out clear communication accidental injury may occur. It is CG's responsibility to use the safe words as directed. Using the safe words will not elicit additional punishment.

Red - CG has reached his limit for an activity. All activity will cease immediately.

Yellow - CG is nearing his tolerance for an actively

Blue - CG has immediate need of a restroom

A breach of CG's skin will halt all activity immediately.

Enemas and holding of water may be used as forms of punishment. CG will use the safe word blue to avoid accidents when containment is under his own control. CG will be allowed to evacuate the results and recover in the privacy of his own bathroom.

When he finishes the paragraph he looks up. _"That means what I think it means doesn't it?"_

_"Yes Christian it means exactly what it says. You did not remove the enema tools from the playroom. This is now non negotiable." _He draws in a deep breath.

Isolation may be used as a form of punishment. CG maybe subjected to periods up to seven days in complete isolation. CG will be provided with a panic button and will be attended to with in three minutes of its activation.

CG may be restrained for long periods of time. CG maybe isolated while restrained. If isolated a panic button will be affixed in CG's right hand. CG will be attended within one minute of activating the panic button.

Things that will be excluded from use in punishing CG.

Withholding of food or water as punishment.

Breath control will not be used.

Any activity that would lead to physical harm beyond bruising and welts.

Fire, flame, burning, and hot wax will not be used as forms punishment.

Electrical current whether AC or DC will not be used as a form of punishment.

Needless, knives, razors and piercing implements will not be used. No permanent injury will be inflicted.

CG will not be subjected to caning, anal fisting, or punishment fucks administered by a male.

When he finishes the page Christian remains quiet. I can see him rereading it's contents. He takes a deep breath and visibly relaxes.

_"Do you have anything you want to ask?"_ I keep my voice soft and reassuring. There is a lot to assimilate in the punishment guidelines.

He looks down at his hands, twisting his fingers. _"Have you ever ordered a male be punishment fucked but another male?"_

Now it is my turn to be uncomfortable. _"Yes, Christian I have, just once. My male sub was injured, I became jealous and enraged. I punished both males, beyond reason. I even ignored a safe word. It will never happen again. I have since learned how to effectively administer a punishment fuck myself." _He looks relieved, I would have been scared by my admission in Christians position. _"Are you ready to continue?"_

He turns the page

Sexual training and activities

CG will obey any instructions given by EL immediately without hesitation or reservation and in an expeditious manner. CG will agree to any sexual activity deemed for and pleasurable by EL. He will do so eagerly and without hesitation.

CG May be given reward chips by EL for exemplary behavior. They maybe exchanged for sexual activities of CG's choice. Subject to the approval of EL.

If CG is asked if wishes to participate in an activity during sexual training, CG will answer in only two ways:

If CG would like to participate he will answer "_As long as it pleases you Elena." _

If CG would prefer not to participate he will answer. _"Only if it pleases you Elena."_

EL will take into consideration CG's preference. His answer will not be the deciding factor.

The following may be included in sexual training and activities:

masturbation

cunnilingus

Fellatio

Vaginal intercourse

Anal intercouse

Vibrators

Dildos

butt plugs

ball, cock, and anal restraints/trainers

Spanking

paddling

Whipping

suspension

inversion

clamps

blindfolding

Gags

Sensory deprivation

Ice

The following activities are excluded from sexual training and activities.

Enemas and holding of water.

Breath control will not be used.

Any activity that would lead to physical harm beyond bruising and welts.

Fire, flame, burning, and hot wax will not be used

Electrical current whether AC or DC will not be used

Needless, knives, razors and piercing implements will not be used. No permanent injury will be inflicted.

CG will not be subjected to caning, anal fisting, or urethra plugs

_"Christian do you have any questions about sexual activities?"_ I can see him hesitating to ask something. _"Christian, you can ask me anything. There won't be lies between us."_

He can't look at me and a blush is crossing his skin. I simply wait.

_"Elena, enemas and holding water are on the punishment list. If this is an activity you enjoy why Is it excluded on the sexual training list?"_

_"Christian, part of what I enjoy about punishment, is the control I have over basic human function. That activity is debasing, humiliating and painful. It can also be very sexually simulating. It is definitely an effective tool. For me it is part of the punishment process. If after you have experienced this you would like me to remove it from the excluded activities I will consider doing so. Do you have any other questions?"_

_"The urethra plug, it's not excluded as punishment, but it is excluded here, I would then assume it is for the same reason. But I don't even know what it is." _His voice is almost a whisper and he is blushing.

_"A urethra plug is a fairly thin rod up to about six inches long. That is used to stretch the urethra. Some men find it stimulating. They come both with and with out a hollow tube center for urine to escape. I think they are ugly. There a smaller versions that wrap around the head and only block the tip for forced urine retention. Do you have any other questions?"_

_"No Elena"_

_"Christian, the rest of the book, Is your eating, sleeping and exercise regiment. I expect you to read those sections and be following them by 10:00 pm tonight. Izzy, Josh, Gideon, and I are family, actually closer. I do not keep secrets from them. You do not have any privacy from them. I am well aware of how difficult what you are going through is. Josh and Gideon have both been submissive, you are allowed to talk to them if you need or want to. Now go to the playroom and wait for me."_

_"Elena, were they your submissives?"_

_"No, Christian, they were not my subs." _Christian, walks head down towards the house. I follow closely headed for my shower.

Izzy is in the kitchen making me breakfast, we leave in an hour. God I hate political lobbying, Linc knows it. We're Republicans, I am a Kennedy democrat, I keep my mouth shut, and put pressure on the right people. Just like he punishes me brutally before and after fund raising and charity events. He lavishes me with attention and only uses his hands on me during political events. I am looking forward to feeling his skin against mine. Josh comes ambling in as I am staring out the window. I love watching Christian work. I grab my stool at the bar and scarf down my oatmeal, starved and anxious is not a good combo.

Gideon comes in just as I am finishing my toast, it's time to go. As I gather my things he asks _"Solve the virginity situation with your toy yet?" _I playfully slap his arm, the door slams, before I can make a crack back. I look out the window Christian is pacing, running his hand through his hair. Oh Shit, Damnit he heard it. Crap what am I going to do. Nikko has my arm and is walking me to the car. My mind in screaming _"Christian"_ but I am following Nikko.

The flights are fine, the airports are a nightmare. Traveling with three security team members, all huge guys, yells, hey paparazzi, here take a picture. The layover in Atlanta, to convince three Senators wives to pressure their husbands, is brutal. I hate landing at Dulles, you come in over the Potomac, it looks like your going for a swim, plane and all. We exit with us all smiling, and run the paparazzi gauntlet again. None of this is accidental. This is all business. We need a no vote on pending legislation. Otherwise, I would have flown first class alone, or private.

By the time I am ensconced in the back of the car I am drained. There is a small blue box on the seat. My heart pounds, I open it, inside is a thick anchor chain bracelet from the end dangles a heart shaped padlock. A handwritten note from Linc, underneath it reads. You are forever chained to my heart. I put the bauble around my wrist, caressing the smooth golden links. I rest my head against the glass, and fall asleep.

We must be at the brownstone, my door is open and Nikko is picking me up. I am used to being carried from the car to bed. I know it seems child like, but Linc insists I not be woken and honestly I find it comforting. It started almost ten years ago, we didn't even know I was pregnant. I fell asleep on the way home after a particularly brutal session in the penthouse. When I wouldn't wake to walk in, the driver left me in the car. I miscarried and almost bled out before Izzy found me. I ended up having a hysterectomy and any possibility of Linc and I having children was gone.

I reach up and put my arms around his neck and rest my head on his shoulder. Then his scent surrounds me, Linc. I draw myself even tighter against him, letting my lips fall against his neck. _"I love you" _his response, _"you are my heart." _

Linc gently lays me on our bed. He loves me in this twilight state. He removes my clothing. I feel the soft, satin cuff surround my wrist. I let my body naturally follow Linc's directions. My body now taut, spread fully open, the restraint gentle and loving. Linc is cooing to me _"open your eyes for me, baby" _I let my eyelashes flutter, Linc leans over placing a kiss gently on each lid. My soft blue eyes find his turbulent sea green ones. _"Can you keep quiet while I take you apart?" _Linc knows me well. _"Only if it pleases you sir."_ He knows I will fail, my answer an admission. If Linc ordered my silence while he punished me I could do it. He could beat and bruise me from head to toe, and I would not make a sound. But, make love to me gently and I am hapless, unable to keep control, keening and mewling.

Linc needed my admission, not my failure. He produces my favorite gag. A modified pacifier gag, the soft bulb almost fills my mouth. Linc bought it for me after my tongue required seven stitches from me trying to remain silent. Neither Linc nor I find gags aesthetically pleasing, but safety is the most important thing. Linc knows how to push me to failure with pain or pleasure, but it is almost always a dangerous endeavor.

Linc straddles my hips, now i can't even wiggle. He is stroking him self, long leisurely strokes. My eyes are riveted, to his actions. He is beautiful, his dark hair is a mass of unruly curls. His eyes are huge surrounded by dark, long lashes. His nose is strong and straight. His lips full, a perfect cupids bow, slightly plum in shade. His chest has fine dark hair that lays softly, accentuating his perfectly defined chest and abs. His skin is bronze, naturally. I am already dripping, I can feel the moisture, running along my labia, pooling just under my butt. One perfect little white bead has formed on the tip. I pull on my restraints trying to get to him.

Linc stretches out over me, covering me with the weight of his body. The gag doesn't stop the soft mewling noises. I need him desperately. I know he can feel my whole body trying to raise against him. He runs his lips over the gag, I want to kiss him, feel his tongue probing my mouth. His lips trail kisses along my jaw, grazing warm breath against, my oh so sensitive skin. Warm breath my undoing. Linc continues his slow assault, kissing, licking, suckling my neck. I am rising fast, writhing against his body.

The warm breath over my collar bone, the tip of his tongue trailing it. I want to beg, plead anything, I need! He's rippling my nipple between his thumb and fore finger. Pulling, twisting then sucking. He slaps first one breast then the other. My breathing is raspy, un-gaged I would be panting. Linc pulls himself so he is sitting straddling me again. I feel bereft and lost. He shows them to me, nipple clamps. He continues his assault on my breasts, torturing my nipples. Then he placed the clamps, biting, stinging pushing my need.

Linc continues to work his way down my torso. He is teasing tickling, kisses, his breath, I want to tangle my fingers in his hair. My whole body is pulsing. Then he moves down. His fingers play in the small triangular patch of curls, he slides one down my labia, I shudder. I am suckling on the gag in my mouth, its not providing relief. It is pushing me higher. Linc moves down between my legs, he places his mouth against me, and start panting. my whole body convulses. Linc shoves two fingers into me running his palm over my swollen clit. I pulse around him, trying desperately to draw him deeper.

_"I think we're ready, don't move" _his voice deep husky full of need. He releases the restraints on my ankles. Kneels between my legs and pulls up my butt onto his thighs. I am watching him, Linc pulls on his cock, then I see he is wearing a ball stretcher ring, how didn't I notice before. He leans over me attaching a long chain to each of my nipple clamps. He positions himself, and plunges into me, he's not moving. I am rolling my head from side to side, I can't take this I need relief. Then I feel the tug on my nipples sending new waves of pain and pleasure through me. I look at Linc, trying to plead with my eyes then I realize what he has done. He has attached the chains from my nipple rings to the ring surrounding his cock, with very little slack. Every time he pulls out, the chains will pull my nipples and stretch his balls, relaxing as he thrusts. Oh God Linc please hurry. Then he is fucking me, the stimulation is overwhelming. I am shattering, I am going to go into a million fragments. Linc's words _"wait for me baby." _But I can't, I am already beyond the point of no return. I can feel my body, pulsing, grasping over and over. I feel Linc's release, and then he collapses over me. We lay like that for a long time, my arms restrained, my mouth gagged, Linc's body crushing mine, sated.


	7. Chapter 5 - virginity situation

I wake nestled in Linc's arms. It is an unplanned moment. Linc spends his time at the penthouse in the city, it is his home. In fact I can't remember the last time he slept in our home. Even here in DC, at the Brownstone we call home, we each have a bedroom. We make each other happy. We're both FUBAR people, I help Linc feel in control of the world, and Linc helps me feel in control of myself.

I am due at the league of women voters breakfast at 8:00, the white house for the first ladies lunch at 12:30, then Linc and I will attend the state dinner tonight. I need to run. I stretch, head to my room, and look for the pink garment bag marked 1. Janie is the best. My personal clothes are in pink garment bags, working clothes in blue, and travel clothes in green. Follow the bags in numerical order and I am correctly dressed every time. I pull on a pair of soft pink sweats, sports bra and my Nikes. I head out for the mall. I love running past all the monuments.

I look at my phone, no text from Christian. He is supposed to text when he goes to bed. His Friday curfew is 1:00 am. It is 1:30 am at home. I hope he simply forgot. But, something tells me this is not good. I hit dial.

_"Hello"_ he sounds drunk. This is not good.

_"Christian are you drunk?" _I try to stay calm. Yelling at a drunk won't help.

_"Sure am" _god he is cocky

_"Christian, call a cab and go home or to my house."_ I am trying too stay calm.

_"Can't do that." _It's slurred

_"Why not Christian?" _Take a deep breath

_"Cause I gotta fix a situation with your toy" _holy crap this is worse than I thought

_"No, Christian, there is no situation with you. Just an unusual circumstance. You need to call a cab and go home."_ I am stern this time

_"Gretchen's coming back, bye bye"_ the call ends. Damnit, Josh and Nikko are both with me. I dial Gideon.

Gideon answers on the first ring _"Christian in trouble Gideon. He's trying to fuck a girl and he's drunk. I don't know exactly where, there was jazz playing, it sounded like the gaslight district. Find him!"_ I know I sound desperate

_"What do you want me to do when I find him?"_ Gideon is trying to remain calm.

_"Lock him in his room. I'll be home tomorrow. Have Izzy put non perishable food in there before you get back. I want him totally isolated."_ I can barely control my rage.

_"Elena, are you okay?" _Gideon asks almost as if he's afraid.

_"No Gideon I am not okay. I am worried sick, scared too death, and so totally enraged I am shaking. I'll be better when you have him. Call me!"_ I hang up and start my run.

I push too hard. I am sucking wind and feeling fatigued. I haven't even crossed the five mile mark. I will not stop, though I do reduce the brutal pace. Just past the Washington monument a man falls into stride beside me. _"You don't usually run here at this time of day little lady. I surely would have noticed."_ Based on the drawl he's a Texan. If he's a Senator, he's a republican and he's on our hit list. _"Morning Senator"_ He doesn't correct me. I am so glad I slowed enough to breath. _"Mrs. Elena Lincoln"_ the rest of my run is slowed to a jog. But, we can add one more vote to our tally. We must be getting close to the magic number.

It's 6:23 when my phone rings. Its Gideon _"Elena, I've got him. Izzy is gonna have to clean him up, he's been in a fight. But he's alive and safe. You're not going to be home for 36 hours. That's a long time, given what he's going through. Elena his virginity is still intact." _Gideon sounds protective.

_"Do as I asked Gideon." _I end the call

Breakfast brings commitments from a liberal republican and a conservative democrat. Now those are oxymorons if I have ever heard one. Linc should be on the golf course now, him and old man Lincoln round out two different foursomes. They also have meetings with two different committees Monday. The Senate goes on recess for the fourth on Wednesday. We need to get the votes, or postpone a vote. I head back for the brownstone.

I open the bag with my clothes for lunch. Janie has included both a hat and gloves. Really for Saturday lunch at the white house. I guess. I look in the mirror. Oh how very Jackie O. A pale pink sweater set, white pencil skirt, and kitten heels. The skirts to long, the heels are to short, ugh. I pull out the jewelry case. My wedding pearls.

I am lounging with a cup of coffee and my email, when Lincoln comes in. _"How'd it go today?" _It's nearly 6:00 we leave in little over an hour.

_"Secured a no from the Jr Senator from Texas during my run. Confirmed the no from the liberal Republican, got the Conservative Democrat to swing our way at the league. No Senators at lunch but all the target wives confirm that their husbands intend to vote no. How did it go with you?"_ I try to sound bored cause I am.

_"Not as well we're still two votes short of stopping it. And six short of our goal in case there is last minute shifting."_ He sighs _"come sit on my lap" _I move immediately. Following Linc's requests is so ingrained, even when I am trying to provoke him I have a hard time being slow. And right now all I want to do is please him. He pulls me up against him. I kiss his forehead. Linc looks worn and tired. It's unusual. _"You okay, Linc?" _

_"Just tired. Its just, everything lately seems to be a five alarm fire, and I am the only one with a fire hose. With this pending legislation we could lose hundreds of millions. Then there's the protests in Brazil. Everything." _I nuzzle his neck, leaving a trail of kisses to his mouth. I nibble at his lips trying to entice him into kissing me back. He pulls my lower lip into his mouth and bites down hard. I can feel the blood pooling. Taste the sweet copper warmth. Then he is kissing me. Tasting me, sweeping my mouth with his tongue, sharing my very life essence. The alarm on my crackberry is going off. Damnit, just Damnit. We disengage.

I start for my bedroom. _"Elena, before you put your dress on please come see me."_ I am wet, hot and needy. I pull the blue bag labeled three from the rack. The dress is gorgeous, royal blue, the bodice a long satin corset, with a sweetheart neckline, an inch wide band of soft yellow crystals, decorate the top and bottom edge. The skirt is soft chiffon. I start collecting the accessory bags. A pair of Louboutin peep toe pumps, a pill shaped clutch with a long anchor chain and a large barrette all encrusted in pastel crystals, like that trim my dress. No jewelry, what was Janie thinking, I hate to be completely bare, if I don't have shoulders, I need a necklace in public. At least my bracelet matches. My every day diamond stud will have to do. I pull the top of my hair up capturing it in the barrette. I pull on the small lace thong, and step into my heels. Time to go see Linc.

He is smiling as I enter. His vest matches my bodice, and his cuff links are very large single crystals that match my small ones. I stop in the center of the room. Standing in front of me, Linc removes my diamond studs. From his pocket he produces another small blue box. He places a small heart padlock through each ear. Next, he opens a bigger box and hangs a heavy anchor chain around my neck, the chain clings close, but from the center another chain hangs straight down. A fourth padlock lays against my chest. He kisses me deeply, _"thank you for your support in this, I know how hard these things are for you." _Then he kisses me again.

_"But I haven't forgotten that you were an errant wife this week." _He places two metal balls in my mouth. _"Please, turn around and put your hands on the floor." _I do so without hesitation. I barely have my hands on the floor before he pushes into me pulling my hips back. He didn't even bothering to remove his pants or my thong, just pushing them aside. His pace is fierce, I can't do any thing but ride the wave of his cock pummeling me. He is done quickly, leaving me bereft and empty.

He reaches his hand down. I release the balls into it. He places them in me one at a time pushing each deep with his long fingers. Rubbing against my sweet spot both in and out. Then he spanks me, he uses heavy blows. When he releases me, I stand, the balls start their little dance. This is going to be a very long night no matter how short it is. Linc pulls me into his arms_"You are my heart" _he kisses me again. _"I love you, Linc"_ My lower lip still painful. _"Now go finish getting beautiful for me." _

Back in my room I call Gideon. As always, just one ring. _"How's he doing?"_

_"He's only been awake about an hour. He's clearly sore from the fight. And very confused about how he got here. He's pacing again. I think he's fine. Have you reconsidered?"_ His voice once again protective.

_"No Gideon, I am still seething mad. And I am going to punish him."_ I hang up. Gideon has never fought me like this before. I finish pulling on my dress. Linc is calling time to go.

I hate landing, God, I hate landing. Touch and touch. I text Linc _"Wheels Down." _As brutal as he can be with me, it is a privilege reserved for him. No one or nothing is allowed to endanger me. And if it makes me nervous he wants to know when it's over. _"Wheels Down," _every leg, of every flight. I dial Gideon.

_"Lock his bathroom. In a half an hour give him a two liter of water, tell him he has half an hour to finish it. And that I will be there when he is supposed to be done." _I am shaking from the rage again.

_"Elena, maybe you should wait till morning, let yourself calm down, decide after you have looked at him." _He is still trying to protect Christian from my wrath. It isn't going to happen.

_"You have instructions, follow them!"_ I am starting to lose my patients with Gideon.

The ride home seems to take forever. I don't even wait for Josh to open my door. My strides are long and purposeful. I stop at the playroom, getting the things I need. I dial Gideon. _"Gideon, I am going to beat him until he safe words. He's going to need you after. I'll hit the call button when I want you to come to his room."_

_"EL your too angry to do this. Wait, do it tomorrow. Please reconsider."_ I hate cell phones you can't fucking slam them in someone's ear. Of course I am too angry to be doing this. That's exactly why I am going to do it. If I do it once I calm down, I am even more FUBAR than I am willing to admit.

I punch in the code and enter his room. He is sitting on his bed his knees pulled up hugging them. He looks up. I can see the terror in his eyes. I just stand there. _"My bathroom door is locked and you sent me water. Your going to do it to me aren't you?"_

_"Yes, Christian I am. We are not going to talk about what happened until tomorrow. I am simply here to start punishing you." _I lay the urethra plug, enema nozzle, lube and a wide black strap on the bed in front of him. _"When we finish I will not be back until tomorrow morning. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes, Elena"_ his voice is scared, he should be scared

_"On a scale of one to ten how badly do you need to use the restroom. Ten being an accident is imminent."_

_"An eight, I had to go before the water arrived."_ He admits

_"Christian, kneel up. So I can have access to you."_ He does as directed. I hold up the urethra plug, _"This plug, is two parts, essentially a tube and a stopper. When were done pull the stopper to relieve yourself. Wait until you can remove the other portion slowly to do so. I do not want you truly injured." _I generously lube the tube and slowly begin to insert it. I can feel him shaking. He lets out a soft uncomfortable moan. I continue until the tube is inserted all the way to its flair end.

_"Position your self, so you are kneeling with your head resting on your forearms and your ass as high in the air as you can get it."_ I have chosen the smallest nozzle I have. Normally, I wouldn't do this to a newbie. It's his first anal use and it will not be pleasant. I can't resist his ass in the air. I bring my hand down hard. I crash my palm into his ass over and over. He has a nice red glow. He has managed not to cry out yet. I lube both his ass and the nozzle well, then I start to insert the it. He takes a deep breath. He visibly shudders. He cries out as I push the flared end in.

_"It's time to move into the bathroom." _He stands gingerly. He is walking very carefully. I push the call button for Gideon. I point to a spot near the toilet where a hose comes out of the wall. _"Kneel in the head down position again."_ I connect the hose but don't start water flowing yet. _"Christian, I will not be removing either plug. I have no interest in your bodily fluids, only that you hold them while you are beaten. And I am going to beat you. You will need to remove the plugs yourself." _I am sure that it will be Gideon who actually removes them. But, he doesn't need to think about that right now. _"All of your fluids are being contained for you. In your current state it is absolutely impossible for you to have a containment accident. Therefore, blue is not a safe word during this punishment. You still have yellow and red available to you. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ his voice is strangled, almost a whisper.

This is another time when having money has made life easier. The water in this room is designed for my preferences, and to assure safety. The hose I will use is pressure controlled, turning the knob only adjusts pressure with in a safe range. The discharge is metered. Pushing the button dispenses exactly one pint of liquid. It allows me to concentrate on the sub.

I turn on the cold water, I let the first pint flow into him. He is gasping, he moans several times. I reach under his belly to check how distended he is. I am surprised to find him fully erect. I run my hand over him stroking him once. He moans, _"please, Elena, please."_ I knead his belly. I use the strap on his ass six times. Then I add the next pint of water. Again I massage his belly. Tears are streaming down his cheeks. His whole body is shaking. This time I smack his ass with my bare hand. He cries out twice. I reach for the water again. _"Please Elena, no more, please."_ He is openly sobbing. I let the pint, flow in. Again I knead his distended abdomen. He can can't contain his begging. He is becoming frantic. I let the last pint flow into his body. And disconnect the hose. I pick up the black strap and begin working him over. I strike him over and over, from the back of his knees to his shoulder blades. He is crying, screaming, begging me to stop, let him relieve himself. Just past seven minutes he safe words out. Screaming _"red"_ as if it were a curse word. I drop the strap, before he can finish the sound. He falls to his side. He is laying in fetal position on the floor crying as I walk out. Gideon is already moving towards him as I storm past.

I am still hammering my fists into the heavy bag, when Gideon comes in _"Who are you madder at Elena, him or yourself."_ His voice is soft. He knows how shaken by this whole thing I am. I like a nice neat world where things are black and white, ordered. Christian is definitely a grey area.

I continue to pound away. _"Him, most definitely, him." _I don't say, because with him I feel out of control. Christian shakes my control, my hard earned control. He makes me crazy beyond belief.

I drop my arms, the tears come and I am sobbing. Gideon, carries me back to my room and puts me to bed. These people, my family, they take care of me. I was so like Christian when I met Linc. How many times did Linc carry me home and punish me? How many punishments did it take before I learned? Do I have the stamina to help Christian find his controls. How did Linc get me through this?

I wake early, it's not even 4:00 am. Christian's my first thought. I need to get to him, make sure he is okay, comfort him. Be near him in the calm before my raging storm starts again. I stand in his doorway just watching him, he looks so peaceful and innocent. No one would see the turbulent troubled young man inside. He is laying face down, hugging a pillow held under his chest. I sit on the edge of his bed, running my fingers through his soft hair. His eyes pop open, wide with fear. He is trembling

_"I am not here to hurt you." _He visibly relaxes but is still trembling. _"I am here to check on you. I am still angry, and when we talk I will be enraged again. But, right now that can wait."_ He pulls the pillow tighter. When I lift the sheet, he buries his face against it. He is still very red, there are several larger bruises, and too many thin purple streaks to count. The dampness between my legs reminds me just how FUBAR I really am.

_"Christian, look at me."_ He turns his face and meets my gaze. _"You did well yesterday." _Yesterday, I didn't even notice the bruising on his face from the fight. I lean in and kiss him, he yields immediately, kissing me back. I press a small gold token into his hand. When he examines it, he will see that one side has his name. The other says exemplary behavior (1). I still have the first token Linc ever gave me, I cherish it too much to relinquish it for momentary pleasure. _"You need rest. Go back to sleep. Izzy will bring you breakfast at 9:00 am. And I will be back at 10:00 am"_ I kiss him again. Then I head back to my room to change for my run and begin my real day.

It's Monday, Izzy and I start going over my schedule. I am only home two days this week. What am I going to do about Christian? I don't think I could take another incident while I am gone. We are going over my Detroit visit. Elliott has booked me a suite at the RenCen hotel, downtown. It's not where I want to be. If I am going home, I will stay there. _"Izzy, please make me a reservation at the Sagmour. It's on Woodward Ave. in Royal Oak. You'll need three rooms, Linc will want security on each side of me."_ I am traveling with Nikko this trip, I'd prefer Josh but he is taking a well deserved break. They'll probably arrange someone local to round out my team. I don't think I'll ever get used to having a security team; but, I do understand Linc's concerns. He is a major player in a controversial business. There have been threats from radical environmental groups.

I have hit the gym and the salon but it is only 9:40. Twenty minutes till I see Christian. I head for my office, hopefully there will be something that needs my attention.

There is an instant message from Linc.

My Darling wife, the political dynamo,

Thank you for your support this weekend. The votes we needed are secured. Fires still popping up everywhere. Going back to Brazil tomorrow. Won't make Mackinaw, I am very sorry. Kiss Tessa for me.

Your overly tired, overly stressed husband,

Linc

I hit reply, I love asynchronous communication.

My overly tired, overly stressed husband,

It was a lovely weekend, even with all the politics. Thank you again for the beautiful jewelry. I will not kiss Tessa for you. Slap her gladly, but if you want her kissed get someone else.

Your very busy wife,

Elena

Linc, was teasing me. He hates Tessa as much as I do. Tessa is my brothers wife. Eric, ten years my junior is nothing like me. Middle of the road at most things, even tempered, generally happy. He works for a mortgage company, making good money. For a couple in their early twenties they have a very nice life . She needles him about Linc. Why he can't be more like Linc. Why can't he be more successful, make more, give her more. Bitchy and whiney. She wouldn't last a minute with Linc. She would never be a well trained bird in a cage. Even if the cage was gilded.

I head for Christian's room. We have to talk and it is not going to be easy. I have to decide what to do. I knock, usual for me with a sub, but he will need a second to breath. He clearly knows how angry I am, it's written all over his body. He opens the door. He just stands there staring at his feet. The playroom is the most comfortable place to sit, but it is too dangerous to take him there. _"Follow me." _I take him to my closet. There are two chairs and a chaise lounge. I point to one of the chairs, he winches as he sits.

I sit on the arm of the chair. I run my fingers through his hair. His eyes are down, he is very quiet. _"You know I am very angry at you. I have no idea what to do with you"_ I am not lying I have no idea what I am going to do. _"So, tell me your version of what happened. Because right now all I know is you were out past curfew, you were drunk, you tried to fuck a girl named Gretchen, you disobeyed a direct order, then you got in a fight. Did I miss anything?"_

_"Yes Elena, I masturbated before I left home."_ He never lifts his eyes.

_"You can put last night down in your log as the punishment for disobeying the direct order to go home. You can simply write bathroom punishment"_ I take deep breath _"Now, look at me, and tell me exactly what happened."_

_"I couldn't get Gideon words out of my head, the virginity situation. I don't want to be a situation, and I'd rather not be a virgin either." _I put my index finger gently against his lips to stop him.

_"He was teasing me, for having feelings for you. For caring that your not ready. He was not teasing you. I know it hurt and I am very sorry you heard what he said. I will take care of your virginity when we're both ready not one moment sooner. You belong to me. It is mine, and at this moment I am cherishing it."_ I lean over and kiss him. He is erect, I stroke him gently with my nails' _"Continue"_

_"I can't ever get you out of my head, ever. I think of you, I get so hard it hurts. I adjust myself, it doesn't help. Then I was changing and I saw one of the small purple lines on my ass. I got hard, I was naked. It's not hard to figure out. Then when I was cumming, all I could hear in my head, were Gideon's words. I headed to a place I know to drink, I just wanted, his words out of my head. Then, Gretchen was there, she's a friend of Elliott's. She was flirting, and rubbing against me while we danced. I got all hard. I just kept drinking. Then you called. You, Gideon's words, her rubbing against me."_ He is fidgeting with his fingers. He is visually tense. He drops his eyes and stops talking.

_"Christian, I told you there would be no secrets. Finish telling me." _I lift his chin and kiss him. I thought I would get angrier when he told me. Instead I am feeling a great deal of compassion for him. I remember how painful it is to be young. How drinking helps push it down.

_"She got us a room. I was shaking I didn't know if I could tolerate her touching me. She took my shirt off, she even managed not to touch me. Then she saw the marks you left on my back and started screaming. I bolted, some guy in the hall tried to grab me. He thought I hurt her, we fought. I ran, then Gideon had me. You know the rest." _He sighs, drops his shoulders, and his eyes.

_"Christian, look at me." _The look of terror has returned to his eyes. _"You may put the experience with Gretchen and telling me about it down as your punishment for masturbating. I have also decided that to help you with the masturbation issue and punish you for the sexual contact with Gretchen, any time you are out of my presence for the next thirty days you will be wearing a chastity cage. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes and no Elena"_ he looks confused

_"What don't you understand?"_ I think I already know.

_"The chastity cage? Will it hurt? How will I pee?" _He sounds nervous. After, experiencing a urethra plug I can't blame him.

_"The one I am going to use has a hole for you to pee through. I will adjust you correctly in it. It will at times be very very uncomfortable. It will not allow you to obtain an erection. You will see it later today. Are you doing okay today?" _I am worried I may have pushed him too hard.

_"No, but I have never been okay, this is just different fucked up."_ He shrugs

I actually laugh_ "Welcome to the family. We call it being a FUBAR person. Gideon, Izzy, Josh and I and now you." _

_"You sent Gideon to take care of me last night didn't you. Thank you"_ he sounds truly grateful.

_"You needed care I couldn't provide. We will always take care of you. No matter what the problem is. That is forever. Even if you turn in your log."_ I take a deep breath._"Well we have dealt with three of the issues. That leaves three more. For the curfew violation I am going to spank you with my hand thirty times. For the drinking I am going to put a anal plug in your ass before I spank you. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena" _he drops his eyes

_"Last, the fight, for that I am going to let you fight yourself. I am going to put a pair of nipple clamps on you then I am going to pull your arms above your head and connect them. If you let your arms down you will pull on your nipples. You will be in this predicament for an hour. I am also going to allow you the opportunity to earn a cum. If you want I will also put a ball stretcher on you, pull you up onto your toes and connect them. If you relax your feet you will pull on your balls. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena."_ His breath is shallow.

_"Christian would you like to earn a cum?" _I already know his answer is yes.

_"As long as it pleases you Elena" _I smile. He answers in the proper form.

I lift his chin and kiss him again. I get up and flip the switch on the mirror. _"Christian, most of the time of when I put you in a predicament, I will watch you from here. I want to see you struggle, I do not wish to hear you beg. I also want to see your expressions, I do not wish to mar that with a gag. The panic button will be in you right hand. If you press and release the mirror will flash yellow."_ I push a button and the mirror flashes bright yellow illuminating the entire room with a bright glow. _"If you press and hold the room lights up red."_ I demonstrate._" If you safe out I will get to you in less than a minute. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ he is hard as a rock. I kneel in front of him _"don't move"_. I run my nails over his erection. I capture the pearl bead that appears, between my lips kissing the head. He is gripping the chair and panting, trying desperately not to push up. I capture the head in my mouth. His head is back mouth open. I run my tongue around the head of his cock, then drive down over his entire length. I just hold him there, for a long moment. Then slowly, release him pulsing around him, he groans. _"Wait for me in the playroom."_ He jumps and moves quickly out of the room.

I am going to let him anticipate his punishment for at least fifteen minutes. I grab my phone, hit the connect button, _"Izzy, Gideon tea in the kitchen." _I head for the kitchen. I tell them what actually happened with Gretchen. I tell Gideon about Christian thanking me for his care. And ask Izzy to set my lunch up in front of the mirror. I head for the playroom, it has been twenty two minutes, forever to Christian. I strip except for my white stiletto pumps.

I enter the playroom instead of jumping, Christian sighs. The look of terror has returned to his face. _"Christian, I'd like you to kneel on the wide bench." _I gather all the necessary implements, and lay them on the bench in front of him. A pair of nipple clamps, a slender butt plug, a half inch wide 1.75 in diameter ball stretcher and lube. _"Do you have any questions?"_

_"Not about anything on the bench. But, I would like permission to ask something different. Elena." _He is very hesitant in asking.

_"Ask"_

_"Can you suck me with that plug thing in my cock?"_ I have never seen him blush so deeply or sound so shy.

_"Yes, it can be done. Tell my why?" _I do not understand the device as anything but torture. I have never had a sub who enjoyed it either.

_"I was very uncomfortable when you put it in. Then while I was walking to the bathroom it moved. I got so fucking hard I wanted to scream. Then you stroked me, I almost came. It felt so different." _I am fascinated.

_"If I am going to suck you with it in. Then you are going to have to endure wearing it the entire punishment. I am going to use a solid plug so even your cum will be retained until you remove it. Christian, I have never done this with anyone. I have seen it done and I know it is safe. Christian, would you like me to insert a plug."_ I am slick, my juices are running down my legs.

_"As long as it pleases you Elena." _I need contact with him. I need him. Christian is going to get his first lesson in female anatomy.

_"Christian, I want you to kneel up tall, on the floor, facing the bench."_ His face is confused but he quickly complies. Then I climb on to the bench and squat, with my legs spread wide. _"Christian, move to where you can comfortably touch me. I want you to use the hand you jerk with to explore my parts. You are going to jerk yourself with your opposite hand. You have three minutes, I will time with the clock on the wall behind you. You are allowed to cum if you can. If you stop jerking your done. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ there is true wonder in his voice. I want him to know what he does to me. I always knew with Linc, it was never a question, his erection is hard to hide. But, without any experience, he has no way to judge the effects on me. He starts by running a tentative finger over each labia. Then he slides two fingers between them, opening them wide. He is close enough I can feel his warm breath on me, it pushes me higher, he just looks, at me. He doesn't stop jerking. He doesn't have much longer. Time is getting short so is his control. Then he bites his lip and runs the pad of index finger over that little nub, that point that can unhinge a woman in seconds. A moan escapes, I pulse and gush. His eyes widen, then he decides to go for it. He plunges a finger into me, the web between my his index finger and thumb runs over my clit. I bite my already sore lip, I will not cum, I will not cum. Then he does, his hand drops from my body. His shoulders slump and he tries to regain his breath. This is punishing me as much as it is him.

I point to the bench and he assumes a kneeling position on it, no hesitation not even a blink. I collect the urethra plug I will use. It is about seven inches in length, shaped like a cane. Very thin at the bottom, it is tapered from the top. The handle of the cane, will hook over the tip, preventing it from slipping deeper and allowing removal. I am not sure I am going to like this. I hate penis piercings. I do not find them aesthetically pleasing. I hate, the metal taste in my mouth and they interrupt the long, smooth, deep strokes I like to provide. A cock is a beautiful thing, paint it, tattoo it, but do not interrupt its natural form.

I hold the plug up for him to see. I lube it generously, I take his now flaccid cock in my hand. I begin inserting the plug slowly, enjoying the feel of his soft cock in my hand. His cock is hardening reaching up to meet the plug. I watch as it disappears inward with fascination. His breathing is ragged, his groans uncomfortable, he is flexing his hands, and biting his lip. But his cock is raging hard. I stroke him twice, eliciting, rumbling moans.

I pick up the nipple clamps, I show them to him, they are alligator clamps, with screws to tighten them. A medium weight chain hangs between them. He shudders as I pull his nipple you to clamp it. I am very careful not to touch anything but his nipple. He cries out as I tighten it. I repeat with his other nipple.

_"Christian, please assume the head down position for me."_ He moves into position, I run my hand gently over his ass. I lean in bathing his bruises with tender kisses, and small nips. I am going to make penetrating him this time much more enjoyable than yesterday. Now, he is moaning heavily. I trail my nails, lightly tickling down his thighs. I run my finger pressing firmly along his taint, fondling his balls from behind.

I place a large dollop of lube and gently use my index finger to massage small circles. As he begins to relax, I resume, kissing and licking the marks. Pushing into him with just the tip of my finger, he groans. I am going to let him, push back, impaling himself. I just keep working him. Once he's impaled himself, I run my thumb along his taint again. I slowly withdraw. I lube the butt plug, and repeat the same process.

_"Christian, I want you watch your own reaction. Please get on all fours."_ I go to the restraint wall, I get the chin rest for this bench. I set it in front of him, I fold down the clamps and secure it, then adjust the height of the rest. When he places his chin on it, his head is tilted up and looks straight forward. I put the mirror against the end of the bench.

_"I want you to watch yourself. You are not allowed to close your eyes for more than a moment. I will give you one warning. If I have to warn you again it will be punishable. Do you understand?"_ It is really, that I want to see him react as I drive him higher without relief.

I run my nails over his butt lightly. I pull my hand back, I see him brace himself. I bring my hand down and swat each cheek just once. Playfully, just enough, to move the plug, sway the chain, and send a flood of warmth. His butt is already raw and bruised, indicating more would be for the most part ineffective. A flash of mild pain rushes through him, followed by a flush desire. I love the nuances that cross his face. The fretful chewing of his bottom, the fear as I raise my hand, the slightly shy blush as pleasure chases pain across his body.

I reach under him, stroking him, fondling him, more soft cuffs to his ass. Each eliciting moans, deeper and more rumbling as I continue. I can feel the moment he decides I am not going to actually beat him. It is only a few slap later that his eyes close for the first time, his expression, sheer bliss. _"Christian, eyes"_ they pop back open.

I run my lips over his marks, bathing them with my tongue. My hand again is gently stroking his cock. Then I use just my fingers, snapping them upward, they slap his cock into his abdomen. There is a small intake of breath, followed by a heavy moan. His eyes flutter shut. His face is savoring the pleasure, I pull my hand back and wait. When they don't flutter back open, I utter _"eyes" _and swing. The blow rocks him forward, it sets his nipple chain swinging, and causes him to howl in pain.

I capture the chain stilling it's motion. I resume the slow gentle, play and spanking. His eyes stay open, for the rest of my playing. I lower the chin rest. I run my fingers through his hair. _"Christian, I'd like you to lay on your side, and pull your knees up and hold them."_ I want to run my hand along his spine, tickle and play. He won't tolerate it, and I don't want to drive him any further out of his comfort zone. I tug slowly, removing the butt plug. There is a gasp as it leaves his body, followed my a mournful cry.

_"Christian, I want you to rest. You can rest here or in your room. You have been on all fours for the better part of an hour. I do not want your arms fatigued before we start your predicament. In one hour, you are to be waiting in here for me. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_


	8. Chapter 6 - a pound of flesh

I watch my play room from my closet. Christian choose to rest in his room. Of course, I locked his bathroom door. I love state of the art security. I can lock and unlock any door with its code from any panel in the house. Every room has at least one panel. An intruder alert locks every entry point to every room, a disaster alert unlocks every entry point to every room. A sub in isolation can escape an emergency just as if they were simply in their room . A sub in isolation also has a fall monitor on. It sets off alarms in every room of the property. A sub is never left in a predicament without direct observation. A sub is never left isolated and bound without direct observation. I will not hurt a sub from a foreseeable preventable accident.

At 57 minutes he enters the play room and kneels. He winces when he jars the hanging chain, sending pain through his nipples. He strokes himself just enough to achieve a full erection. I smile, he is trying to remember and follow the rules. At least the rules that may get him a cum. He is ready. I enter the room at exactly one hour.

I roll my predicament rack to the front of the mirror. The first time anyone tied me up. It was in a park, to the monkey bars. It was the inspiration for this rack. There is a twelve foot tall set of money bars at the center. Mounted near the back to a frame are two library style ladders. Near the front is a rail three inches above the base. Its platform is designed to absorb shock should a sub fall. It is mounted on eight four inch locking casters. It is good to have money.

_"Christian, please kneel upright on the platform, and look at me."_ His expressions are fleeting, quickly changing from one to another._ " Even with all the right equipment this is going to take a little while to position you. It will also take a few minutes to release you. Then if you are successful I am going to suck you. I am sure you want that to take more than a few minutes. But honestly it won't. I also made you rest an hour, if you would like to relive yourself. I will reinsert the plug."_

_"Only if it pleases you Elena"_ this gets more and more interesting.

_"How badly would you need a restroom right now if containment was under your own control."_ I am trying to understand this.

_"If you took the plug out I could not maintain containment. But Elena, I made an agreement. And this is punishment, the rules say: Punishment, the timing, nature and severity will be at the sole discretion of Elena. This is a timing thing. If I fail it is my own fault. It has made me realize I need to think further ahead."_ It is his punishment and his reward, I will let the decision be his. If he learns that lesson it is invaluable. I really do not understand this.

I get the panic button, two long chains, cuffs for his wrists and ankles, a spreader bar and the ball stretcher. I return to the platform, I secure the stretcher to his balls, I tickle them with my nails. He moans. I secure the panic button and then his wrists. I put on his ankle cuffs and begin to secure them to the bar. _"Elena why the bar?"_ His voice timid._ "So your feet move together."_ I hook the chains to the center of the bar and his wrists. I climb one of the ladders and put the chains over the monkey bars.

_"Please stand Christian. I am going to start the time now. Do you want it where you can see it?"_ I have to hook up the ball stretcher first. He will be in his predicament from that moment on. When I start the time depends on the predicament.

_"As long as it pleases you Elena."_ I smile, there is a small table in front of the mirror. I open the base. And take out the sand timers namesake an hour glass. It has deep red sand. I only asked to know his reaction. The timer sits on the table if a sub looks at it they see their own reflection and I see their face straight on. Yes, I am most definitely a voyeur.

.

I run the chain attached to his ankles under the front rail. I want his balls pulled down and forward, not up. I step up onto the platform. _"Christian, we have to put you on the balls of your feet do please do a calf raise."_ I know I said toes, but he is a newbie and that was harsh even for me. I pull the slack out of the chain and clip it to the stretchers attachment chain. I pull the slack out of his arm chain. I step in and I kiss him._ "Christian, you are doing well again today, I find you very pleasing. Please put your arms over your head."_ He has already admitted pleasing me is important to him. He'll need something to hold on to when this gets difficult. I hope that helps. I pull the rest of the slack out of the chain attach it to the center of the one attached to his nipples. It's time for lunch.

I defiantly enjoyed my lunch entertainment. Christian, struggling to find the non existent comfortable position. There is something about his pained face that I cannot resist. The occasional howl as he losses control and yanks. The tears streaming down his cheeks. Then the occasional sob that shakes his chains and sends a different form of pain through his chest. I am going to need to play in my own bathroom when this is over.

I dial Gideon on the way to the playroom. _"Gideon, please wait in my closet. When I start to release him please come to the playroom"_ I can hear the concern in his voice._ "Elena?"_ Before he can say more,_ "I didn't beat him. He just going to need assistance I think he would rather you provide."_

I am standing in the doorway when the timer runs out. The relief on his face visible, even though he is still in his predicament. I grab heavier chains, they are capable of supporting his whole body weight. I will need to release him safely. Christian will be unable to stand under his own weight, his feet and legs will be cramping violently.

_"Christian, I am going to release you. Some of this is going to cause even more pain than you have already endured. Do you understand?"_ I am soft and quiet. The punishment is over and he deserves comfort.

_"Yes, Elena, please don't"_ His voice pleading, my heart pounds, what doesn't he want me to do.

_"Please don't what Christian?" _I ask still keeping my voice soft.

_"Please don't release me before you make me cum."_ He is still pleading with me.

_"Christian, you are going to be an amazing top someday, but today is not the day. I have been indulgent with you about this reward all day, so I am going to meet your request half way. I will leave you bound, but I am going to remove the predicament. Do you understand?"_ I understand his need to be bound to receive pleasure while his body is still in agony.

_"Yes Elena thank you"_ his voice is raspy.

I secure both chains to the platform, one on either side of him. Then to his wrists and ankle bar. I kneel in front of him. I release the chain pulling his balls, I pass it back under the front rail and secure it to the chain now holding Christians on the balls of his feet. I unclip the tension chain from the nipple clamps, then the chain connecting them. Both bring premature sighs of relief from Christian. I remove the first clamp. Capturing his nipple in my mouth, Christian howls from the pain. Suckling, massaging, comforting. As the stinging pain radiates through his chest. He is biting his lip as I release the second clamp. He cannot contain a second howling noise. I suckle and comfort until he has calmed.

I run my tongue up the front of his cock. My tongue bumps against the plug. He moans, deeply. I am annoyed. I run my tongue around the head capture it and release it between my lips. The plug rubs my lower lip, distracting me. No I do not like this in his cock, not while I am sucking him. I play for a full minute, licking, sucking, running my nails over him. He is begging, for relief. I take him into my mouth. Ugh, I hate the metal taste. I work him deep and furious it takes less than another minute, before he is cumming apart, shattering.

When he is released he collapses against Gideon. He is sobbing from the pain in his body. I kiss him once more before Gideon carries him to his room.

_"Wheels Down in Detroit"_ Linc will know I am safe. Nikko comes forward to first class from coach. He refuses to fly first class with me. He maintains a professional distance I don't have with Josh or Gideon. I am escorted off the plane first. Having personal security does have advantages. As I step off the escalator I see Elliott. I didn't expect to see him here at the airport. He hands me a duffle bag and tells me to go change. When I hesitate, he snaps now. And my training has me moving.

On the top of the clothing is a note. _"Have fun, hugs Janie_ So Elliott asked Janie for clothes. I empty the bag, jeans, leather chaps, vest, gloves and jacket, finally motor cycle boots. The jeans and boots are black, the rest is my preferred navy blue. I stand back and look in the mirror. Damn, I always look good, but this is fucking scorching.

The shape of the bike forces me to lay over Elliott's back clinging to him. We are flying along the expressways. Some how they seem darker here, more raw, brutal. Even the tags on the overpasses seem more like protesting screams, than territory marking art.

We pop up onto Jefferson avenue, blasting past cobo center and Joe Luis arena. The river front is cleaner than I remember. We pass the bridge and all the old familiar sights. Funny how everything changes and yet remains the same. He turns onto the Belle Isle bridge.

Even now, in the middle of the night the island is teaming with life. It's a hot summer night, not a time to be inside, in the stagnating air. It's all going on. Drinking, drugs, sex, and fighting. It takes awhile to find a quiet place to talk. Down by the water, near the coast guard station, we find a that spot.

We sit in silence for a long time just looking at the Canadian river front. Then he says it, casually as if it means nothing. _"You gave Christian a log." _

_"You know I won't discuss it with you. I wouldn't discuss your log with him either."_ I feel protective of them both.

_"Well, that's your choice, but either we talk about it. Or I talk to him. You choose."_ He is getting angry

I sit for a long time before answering. _"Yes, Christian has a log."_ I say spewing it from between clenched teeth.

_"What are you thinking Elena? He has enough issues to start."_ Elliott is clearly protective of Christian. What is it with these men. First Gideon now Elliott. I shrug.

_"Are you fucking him Elena? Tell me what the hell are you doing to him?"_ Elliott is pissed

_"If I tell you the truth, you can't say a word. You do Elliott and expect to find yourself, head down, ass in the air, in my bathroom. Do you understand?"_ I see him stiffen, and fear cross his face.

_"Yes Elena."_ It has been ingrained.

_"Elliott, Christian, is still a virgin. I have no intention of changing that any time soon. He has a lot to figure out first"_ my voice is soft, gentle, and very shy.

_"El, do you have feelings for him, real feelings?"_ His face is confused, and his voice sounds as if he's been gobstopped.

I look at my feet fidgeting, but I don't answer.

_"El, you always said what we shared was forever, no secrets. I need to understand this. I need to know what is going on and how you got like this." _This time there is genuine concern in his voice.

_"Elliott I am on this project till it's done. We're going to be here a lot in the next eighteen months. There is a lot. A lot of secrets, a lot of scary shit. I can't tell you all at once. This place broke my insides beyond repair. I'll tell you one thing every time we are here. Tonight, I'll tell you how it started. But, not here. Let's go."_ I give Elliott directions, and were off again. This time chasing north on I-75. I am glad were on the motorcycle. I need the comfort that clinging to Elliott's back provides. I am thankful for the noise of the engine, and the shield on my helmet hiding my tears.

_"Elliott, I promised on Belle Isle I would tell you how it started. Now that we are where it started. Are you really sure you want to know how I got this FUBAR?"_ He just nods his head yes.

_"I was just thirteen, he was sixteen. A talented jock he tried for a scholarship. He didn't get one. He hated me cause I got asked to apply. He called me miss high and mighty. I had picked up groceries for my mom at the double heart grocery. I talked to a friend too long. It was that point in the fall where it gets dark quick and early. I cut across the park. He grabbed me. I was still so tiny, he was so huge. He held me upside down against his chest. He had one arm around my waist. He was biting my thighs. He tied my feet to the monkey bars. He fucked my face till I swallowed his cum twice. He cut me down. Spanked my naked ass. Threw me on the ground and asked 'Feel so high and mighty now bitch.' He never stopped his teasing. He'd laugh 'Would you like to go to the park with me.' He was relentless. I've never told anyone Elliott, not one fucking person. Not even Linc."_ I am wrecked. Sobbing, shaking and shivering, it is 85 ° out.

Elliott takes his leather off and uses it to pull me against his chest. My tears are drenching his t-shirt, plastering it to his well defined muscles. He holds me until I regain myself. I pull out of his arms. He doesn't try to restrain me._ "Are you still sure you wanted to know Elliott?"_

_"No, Elena I am not sure I did. But now I do know, and it explains a lot." _He is being fucking gentle. I don't do gentle.

_"Like my penchant for beating young men and making them beg me to suck their cocks. Ya think, maybe, that's it Elliott. I know I am fucked up beyond all repair. I may fool most of the world, I am not willing to fool myself."_ I am hissing at him.

_"Elena, is there anything I can do?"_ He is really trying to be sympathetic. I need something to help me get my control back. It's not happening any time soon.

_"Not really Elliott, wanna grab a great cheap greasy burger?"_ I haven't been to national Coney in eighteen years. We jump back on the bike. I lean into his back, and hang on, life is getting bumpy.

Nikko is scowling at me again. _"See you at the airport."_ I flip down my visor, throw my leg over the bike, lean into Elliott, and were gone. It's been a hectic couple of days. The site is a closed school. It backs up to one of the many wooded swamps. It's perfect for Elliott's vision. We've spent the last two days interviewing local contractors, arranging suppliers and working with the building department on demolition issues. We've gone everywhere on this bike. Linc would not approve. I feel alive.

I saved every penny I ever made. On my sixteenth birthday I bought my first piece of Detroit Muscle a 1968 Chevy Nova SS built to the point it was barely street legal. You would be surprised how much money rich bastards will shove in your pocket as they grab your ass when your waitressing catered events. I loved to run that car for all she was worth. I am taking Elliott to one of my favorite places. It is 4:00 am and we are going to race the wind and chase the curves through Kirk in the Hills. I was due at Troy Executive Airport at 6:00 am for my flight to Mackinaw. I've chartered the plane for the long weekend they can wait.

Oh my God that was fun. Shit, Nikko is leaning on the car doing his best impression of me. He's tapping both his foot and his watch. Oh, God do I really look like that. I scowl at him _"My money, my time."_ Just as nasty he replies _"Your safety, my job."_ I hand Elliott my helmet and let Nikko take me the the plane.

Less than ninety minutes later were "Wheels Down on Mackinaw." Linc's text reply catches me by surprise _"You behind schedule? Flight okay? You okay" _I simply text. _"Flight fine, I'm fine, just an off day."_

My mom will have us scheduled to the last second. Including time to be spontaneous. I really would have prefer to spend the long weekend at the place I built them on Lake Michigan. But, my mother loves this place. She hands each of us an itinerary. She doesn't just plan group activities, she plans everything. I see mine includes running and kayaking with Eric, shopping with mom, and lake watching with dad. I am looking at my watch making sure I am not already behind. It's that old falling apple thing, it doesn't get too far from the tree.

Mom and I will rent a drive your own buggy and shop for four hours. I actually hate to shop even though I love giving perfect gifts. It's why I have Janie and her staff. My mom and I, well difficult doesn't quite describe it. Shortly after I married she walked into the bathroom on me showering. She saw the marks Linc left on me. She can't stomach Linc and she doesn't understand me. But this shopping trip is different. We catch up, we reminisce, and we laugh a lot.

Neither Eric or I feel like being in the water, so we chase each other through the woods on horse back. Our time together is really quiet. We rarely ever speak when alone together. When we do its usually serious. Eric and I have this weird asynchronous relationship. He was six when I left. I was the cool sister who always sent the best presents and took him on the best vacations. Funny thing is, at twenty four and thirty four I still am.

I managed to keep my mouth shut during lunch while Tessa, belittled Eric. I offered her my services when she was complaining about not being able to afford to have her gardens done. I bit a hole in my lip when she was comparing Eric unfavorably to Linc. But, I lose it when she cracks at me _"Such a shame family means so little to your husband, that he couldn't join us."_ I punch her, blood is running down her face her eyes, are swelling and I am yelling_ "You fucking bitch, I listen to you rag all fucking day. Then you, shoot a barb at me. You are a real piece a work. You don't keep a hundred billion dollar company running working 8:00 - 4:30. You don't get to gaze at your wife across the dinner table every night and be where you want to be when the day is done. Wake up and look around you. You have a pretty great life try to enjoy it."_ I storm out.

I am less than a quarter mile out when my dad catches me. He asks me to slow. I am so glad he is willing to run, I am willing to slow so we can talk. He tries to sound stern but it rings hollow_ "You could have just slapped her, it is more you style."_ We both laugh, pick up the pace and run side by side the eight miles around the island. Slapping her would have been my style, but this trip has me on edge. When we return, it has been decided Tessa and I were sparing and she missed a block. She is acting quite contrite.

I manage to get a pic of her face, swollen nose and black eyes without anyone noticing. I send it to Linc:

To my missing husband,

I kissed Tessa as requested. Kissed her with my fist that is. See attached photo for verification. Details in fourth coming email.

Your very obedient wife,

Elena

The response is almost immediate.

My very obedient wife

I believe you have earned a behavior token. Thank-you for making my day. Look forward to the details.

Missing my wife,

Linc

My phone rings at 4:05 am. It's Christian his voice is weak and scared_ "Elena, I need you. There's been an accident, someone's been hurt and I am arrested."_ Crap, deep breath, handle this like it's a Linc's kid, get scared and angry later.

_"Christian, do not say a word to anyone except Leo, you really don't want to go to the bathroom"_ I leave a pregnant pause and continue _"there unless you absolutely have to." _His sharp intake of breath lets me know he understood. _"Now hand the phone to the police officer with you."_ I tell the officer that Christian has a lawyer, he won't speak further without his lawyer and that his lawyer will be en route shortly.

I start making the necessary calls. Leo is first. Then our bonding agency. The pilot at the airport here. And the charter service in Troy. Now it's time to tell Elliott.

_"Elliott, where are you?"_ I know I sound really upset. I am really upset.

_"Casino in Windsor what's wrong?"_ His voice says he's gone on red, alert.

I gulp air then start _"Christians been in an accident, he's fine. Someone else was hurt. He is under arrest. I have our lawyer Leo on the way. I am sending you a fax number, you need to send the temporary guardian papers since Grace and Carrick are in Europe. I have a jet on stand by at Troy. I should be wheels down there within the hour. He needs us"_ I take a deep breath _"It's worse Elliott, he is in a chastity cage."_ I hear him draw an angry breath. _"We'll talk about it in the air. See you in Troy."_

One more call Josh, _"hello"_ on the first ring, _"Josh, I need a scandal big enough to keep, Christian Grey's arrest from making the news cycle. I don't care what desperate little starlette you pay, I don't care what it costs. I don't care if you have to fuck someone on a table in the bar at the Chateau Marmont. Get it done"_ he didn't get to say anything beyond hello.

To my fire fighting husband,

Christian Grey, arrested. Grace, Carrick, and Mia are in Europe. Lincs for success resources being deployed. On my way home. Putting out fires.

Your engulfed in flames of her own wife,

Elena

To my oh so hot wife,

I would love to use my fire hose on your flames. Your good at this, it's not the first young man we've helped. I knew something would go wrong, you off schedule is never good.

Handling his own fire hose,

Your husband

Linc

To my possessive husband,

Christian's case has been assigned to Judge Hardcore. Permission to keep him out of jail. You know the cost.

Chained to your heart always,

Elena

To my most Prized Possession,

Only if it pleases you Elena, cause it sure as hell doesn't please me. But, I've asked you to do it for less deserving young men. This will cost him, he will watch, while bound and gagged. He will know what his freedom cost you. Other than that until Hardcore sentences, him he stays at the Lincs support center. You may make the decision.

You are my heart

Linc

Linc knew when he sent the message I had already made my decision. Hardcore's name is perfect. Raised in the the heart of the Projects. He is smart, and angry. He is a straight up sadist. His preferred targets, rich white women and rich white young men. He beats the women and the young men go to jail for the max. Though, one can be used to prevent the other. I will not let Christian go to jail.

The cost was worked out between Linc and Hardcore when one of Linc's subs was in trouble. Hardcore has beaten me six times, each to the letter of the agreement, each brutal. He will beat me with a two inch leather strap, on both sides, of my body for a total of an hour, alternating sides every fifteen minutes to make sure I can endure it. I know his preferences, he won't gag me, he likes begging and screaming. I will provide him with a good show. Unfortunately, Christian, will be tuned in too.

I pace in my playroom, Hardcore will be here in an hour. This will be the first time I have seen Christian since his arrest. How much should I tell Christian ahead of this? I pick up the collar, cuffs and gag I have chosen for him. When I enter his room he is pacing. He stops looks at me, and drops his eyes. _"Christian please look at me." _He raises his eyes to meet mine._ "I am going to put these on you. In an about an hour Gideon is going to bring you to the playroom, you will be on a leash and you are to crawl. When you get there, kneel in your usual spot put your legs completely under you, and your wrists behind your back. Keep your chest up and your head down. Your wrist and ankles with be hooked together so you will not be able to stand up. What happens in the playroom today is what it cost to keep you out of jail. Remember this lesson well."_ His is naked except for his gag, collar, cuffs and leash when I leave. The next time he sees me I will be similarly dressed.

Hardcore leads me in by my leash. My hand are behind my back, my eyes are down. I don't even get to look at Christian. I am attached to the cross face down to start. Even the bottom of my feet subject to the beating. When he changes my position, I catch my first sight of Christians face. It registers terror, tear streaked, with red swollen eyes, he is shaking with sobs. I do not know if he is afraid for me, or that he's next.

When Hardcore finishes he drops the strap in front of Christian. _"She did this for you. She loves you. Don't let it be for nothing. See you in my court room."_ At that moment, hearing that fucking bastard say it, I know in every fiber of my being it is true. I love Christian Grey. And I always will.

I don't see Christian that night. Josh and Izzy care for my battered body. I can not leave my bed for the next three days. Izzy tends to me and I am in a painkiller haze. On the fourth morning I wake to the sounds of Christian weeping. I open my eyes slowly, I am afraid to see his face. When I meet his gaze, he asks simply_ "why"_

_"I promised I would take care of you."_ The drugs pull me under again.

The next time I wake, Elliott is sitting beside me, and I don't recognize the room. _"Nice, to see your eyes sunshine."_ I try to talk but there is a tube in my throat. He puts his finger to his lips to keep me quiet. _"Linc will be be back later."_ Linc, what is Linc doing here. _"Your right kidney is damaged, several lacerations. It caused a systemic infection the rest of your organs were shutting down. We almost lost you. I know you can't talk, but I really need to understand what happened. Christian, sent me to check you cause he was scared. You have been beaten within an inch of your life literally. Linc was in South America so it wasn't him. Did Christian do this to you?" _OH MY FUCKING GOD! Elliott thinks Christian did this. I am frantic.

_"Elena calm down. Squeeze my hand once for yes twice for no. Can you do that?"_ Yes I can do that. I squeeze his hand.

_"Do you know how this happened"_ he is talking slow like I am stupid. I squeeze, his hand once.

_"Did Christian do this?"_ I squeeze twice. Elliott looks relieved.

_"Does Christian know what happened?"_ I squeeze, his hand once.

_"Did Christian cause this?"_ I just glare. Wrong question. Elliott tries again _"Does Christian think he caused this?"_ I squeeze his hand.

I spend three more days in the hospital. I still haven't talked to Christian. I have only seen him twice since his arrest. Other than that he's been with a Lincs mentor or Lou. Grace will be home tomorrow. We go to court on Thursday. It is amazing how money can move the justice wheel. Have enough money and you can slow things down or speed them up.

It's only been six weeks since his arrest. The worst parts of this will be over today. Grace and I hold hands directly behind the defendants table. Christian sits beside Lou staring straight forward. He visibly tries to disappear as Hardcore takes the bench. Lou is a brilliant lawyer who looks like Mr Magoo. After his son was killed driving drunk he started giving us his time. If you caught him in a mood, he'd say _"Even, if I save every one of these kids, it will never make the lesson I learned worth it."_

He is trying to salvage his soul. Still a workaholic, he spends his time getting kids lives worth living after a mistake. Not just getting them their old FUBAR life back. He may have missed that his son was in trouble. But, he can see it a mile away now. Walk him down a high school and he can tell you which ones are in for trouble. He can smell FUBAR.

I am zoned out, my body still aching, remembering. Then Hardcore is talking. _"Christian Grey, I sentence you to two years at a maximum security prison of the state's choosing."_ I decided not to have Christian prepared for the exact way this works. I hear his sharp intake of breath. _"The sentence will be held in abeyance, as long as Christian Grey successfully participates in the Linc's for success program. I am to receive quarterly reports. If I receive a negative report or you have contact with this court again you will serve your full sentence. A redetermination will occur on or about your eighteenth birthday. "_

_"Mr. Grey you are a very lucky man. You have very good friends who have sacrificed to make sure you get this opportunity. Do not waste it."_ I see Christian's face wince with the memory of the cost.

Elliott is going to take Christian to pick his stuff up at the center and get him settled back at home. I am going to have lunch with Grace. She goes back to Europe tomorrow. Every summer Grace runs a summer lecture series on the techniques she has developed. I really don't understand the medical stuff. I just know it's important.

Grace stayed with me last night, really she just stayed in the guest room. She was terrified of today, if I were her, I would have been. Two women we know have sons in prison. They thought they had plea agreements. Sure they warn you the judge is under no obligation to follow the plea agreement, but they also reassure you the judge has approved the agreement. Today, we have reason to celebrate, her son is a free man, the cost a pound of my flesh.

Grace is still terribly distracted. I manage to keep her wine glass full. After three, I start pushing for answers.

She finally, breaks down wringing her hands. _"Elena, I took a job in Seattle, and resigned my post here before we left. We decided to tell the kids when we got home. My job here has been filed. Christian can't leave. What the hell am I going do?"_

I take her hand_ "Grace, Elliott's business is here. Christian could stay with him."_

_"He was in charge for two weeks before this happened. Full time, I don't think that would be a good idea."_ She is clearly furious at Elliott.

_"Well, there is the center he's been there for the last six weeks."_ I suggest.

_"From his emails he's miserable there. He just doesn't fit."_ She rests her elbows on the table and buries her face, in her hands.

_"He could stay with me Grace. If I have to travel he can stay at the center. That way he'll be supervised. Linc travels and stays at the penthouse. There is plenty of room. Grace we have gotten him through it so far, we're not going to lose him now."_ I take a deep breath and wait for her response.

_"Are you sure you want to take him on. Honestly, Elena, he is very troubled. You've had to rescue him once already. Are you really willing to do this?"_ I can see relief flooding her.

_"Grace, we've been friends too long, not to help each other. Of course I am sure."_ My heart sings Christian, living in my home.


	9. Chapter 7 - Fountain Dancing

It's the first time I have woken before the alarm in three weeks. I miss my morning run. I pull on my sweats, sport bra and Nikes. I head for the garden, the mud room door slams behind me, making me cringe. It is the first morning in six weeks I have felt like I can breathe. Christian safe.

I head down the path to the gazebo. A brisk walk will have to do. I hear the soft tread of bare footfalls behind me. My breath catches, my heart races as if I were running. He finds his place beside me. He doesn't speak, he simply moves with me. I don't speak either I have no idea what to say. No one, not even Linc, has mattered to my soul the way Christian does. And right now my damaged soul is shattered.

As we approach the gazebo the second time, Izzy is carrying our breakfast tray, headed in the same direction. Her voice is stern. A tone I have never heard her use _"Christian, Josh and Gideon expect you in the kitchen." _She glares at me. She knows I am still under orders to take it slow. She blames Christian for my condition, it seems everyone around me does. I blame only one person, Hardcore.

My schedule is still cleared. Linc ordered it, well the Dr. did, but Linc has put his foot down. _"When, is the young man moving in?" _Izzy's voice is full of anger.

_"Izzy, he didn't do this to me. It isn't the first time my body has been used to save a young man's life. It probably won't be the last. I will recover."_ I sound weary. The walk took more than I expected.

_"No, Elena, you will not recover, permanent damage was done. You may have forgiven him. I don't know if I can."_ Izzy sighs.

I hold both of Izzy's hands. _"Izzy, this is important to me. You have to forgive Christian. Be mad at Hardcore, or me if you must. But, Christian, didn't even know what was going to happen, he was forced to watch. Linc has asked me to do this before, and I have. You have cared for me every time. I chose to save Christian. For the first time this was my choice."_ I sigh deeply. I have gone over this repeatedly, the only difference was Linc's absence. I don't know if the beating was actually worse or if it was just the luck of the draw, destine to happen eventually. Yes this was a catastrophic accident, but as far as I am concerned, just that.

I have decided to spend the upcoming labor day weekend in Detroit. Nothing like a labor town for a labor day party. I dial Leo. I argue with him for several minutes, finally ordering him to approach Hardcore about allowing Christian to travel. I want both Seattle monthly, for family visits. And Michigan with Elliott or myself to work on the project. Finally, I have had enough _"Leo, talk to him, privately, if he objects remind him the police are still trying to find who beat me. That if he is uncooperative we will produce the gate tapes that show him as the only visitor." _Leo is still trying to change my mind when I simply hang up on him. Now, it's time to find Christian and start to get the world back, on its axis, and spinning in the right detection.

I find him sitting in my subs bedroom, on the bed, knees pulled up, resting his head. _"Christian, would you like to see your rooms?" _His shoulders jerk, he hadn't heard me enter. _"Elena, I am in my room." _His voice is soft scared. _"No, Christian you are in my subs room. You are a member of this household now. Your suite of rooms is on the second floor." _Now there are tears streaming down his face. _"Please Elena, this is my room. I...I..."_ He can't continue, he can't find the words.

_"Christian, this is only part of the space you will call your own. If you are isolated, or while we are playing you will be in here. But you need space to be. Space to do homework, study, or just be alone."_ I sound shaky even to me.

_"He almost killed you. You almost died to save me. Two years of my life, hell, my whole life isn't worth that." _He seems torn between anger and awe. _"Why didn't you safe word?" _Now he looks like a confused lost puppy.

_"First Christian, it was eight to ten years of your life. Second, safe words were not an option."_ I am wringing my hands and staring at my feet.

He pulls something out from under his legs and hands it to me. His log. _"Elena, I don't deserve to have this. You deserve someone who listens, does as they are told and doesn't get you hurt." _His voice cracks, the falling tears rain down.

_"And what fun would that be?"_ I laugh trying desperately to break the tension. Out of habit, I open to the punishment section of his book.

There are about ten entries related to the accident. I didn't expect anything else to be in his punishment log. But every weekday is the entry failed to run with Elena. On the day of the beating is, caused harm to Elena. In the line reserved for the punishment is lost Elena. The pain factor _"red." _

I sit next to him on the bed. I run my fingers through his hair. _"Christian, are you ending what is between us? Are you turning in your log?"_ I ask knowing, he wants us to continue, but he is lost at the moment.

_"Elena, I ..." _He is gulping air. He can't find the words and his eyes, are panicked. I simply wait for him to continue. _"I thought you... " _again he is trying to draw, enough air to regain his control. _"Do you want me to keep it?"_

_"Christian, yes, I want you to keep it. I want to continue, but this is always your choice."_ There I said it I want to keep Christian, is he willing to stay?

_"I belong to you Elena. I don't think there is any choice in that."_ I hand him his log. I know he needs to feel my hands on him. He needs to burn. Pain raging in the body, to provide a channel to manage all the pain in his soul. A need I well understand.

_"Christian, open your log, we need to address your transgressions."_ I take a deep breath. _"First, for everything related to the accident. You will write watching Hardcore beat Elena. You must write it for each of the transgressions. I never want you to forget what that accident cost. Do you understand?"_

_"Elena. I will never forget, my nightmares won't let me. I was screaming red, the gag garbled and muffled it. He couldn't hear me, he didn't stop. He just kept hitting you and you kept screaming. But you weren't yelling red. It went on forever. He hit you everywhere. Why Elena? why did you let him do that? Why do you think I am worth that?" _He is shaking and crying

_"I promised we would take care of you. No matter what. We all played our parts. Leo, did the legal thing, Josh kept it out of the papers, Linc's gave you a place, Izzy cared for me, and I paid for your freedom." _I grab his chin and look at his eyes _"And I would do it again to save you. Even knowing the outcome. Christian, some one has to care for you. Someone who's soul is every bit as damaged as yours or you will never accept it. Right now that's me" _

_"Now, as for missing runs with me, if you ran that day you may write forgiven."_ I know he ran many miles every day at the center. My trainer is also the full time director of fitness at the center. He gave me reports himself. _"Now, for the lie in your log. I am going to spank you in the playroom after dinner. Do you understand?"_

_"No Elena, I don't. What lie in my log?" _He seems truly confused. I knew he would be.

_"You wrote lost Elena. I have never been lost to you Christian. Now, do you understand?" _I keep my voice soft.

_"Yes, Elena."_

I check from my closet. He is kneeling there, completely naked, fully erect, hands resting calmly on his thighs, and eyes down. I am going to take him apart. Then maybe we can start putting Christian Grey back together again.

The cross is still where it was the last time both Christian and I were in here. He has been kneeling waiting for me in its shadow for almost an hour. The cuffs that bound me still hang from it. I retrieve them, and walk towards Christian. _"Christian, please stand up and look at me."_

His legs are stiff and he gets up awkwardly. Once standing he turns his soft grey eyes up, meeting my gaze._ " I am going to use these same cuffs, that same strap, and this cross. I am going to use this strap nine times on your ass. One for every week we were apparent, and one for every week you thought you had lost me. Then I am going to turn you over and I am going to play with my nails on your chest for ten minutes. Remember, they are plastic. I am not actually touching you. If you do not safe out, I will let you cum. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena" _his voice is soft surrender. The fear in his eyes evident. I place the cuffs on his wrists and ankles.

_"Christian, kiss me."_ I meet his lips half way. I let him work my lips, nibbling, pulling and nipping. At first he is too rough, then too gentle. When he gets it right I kiss him back, we kiss for a long time. I let Christian lead. When he finally pulls back we are both breathless.

I attach him to the St Andrews cross, face down, I leave just enough slack to allow him some physical movement. The center of the cross is in the center of his chest leaving both his face and his cock easily accessible. I stand to the side almost against him. I start with the strap in my hand. Drawing it over his skin, trailing kisses, behind it. He is moaning and trying to roll his hips, pulling at his restraints.

I bring the strap down three times in quick succession. He howls in pain, I see him pull at his bonds. Again I run the strap gently over his now sensitive skin, trailing my nails and then my mouth. He is moaning and pulling again. I run my hand along his thighs, up between his legs stroking him, several times. I bring down the strap again three times in quick succession.

I step in front of him, grab his chin, and kiss him. Tugging, biting, and crushing his lips. Not allowing him to kiss back.

His cheeks are tear streaked, the tears crystallizing his soft grey eyes. I gently wipe the tears from his face. Sucking the warm saltiness off my fingers. I kneel and capture the pre com dripping from his rock hard cock with my tongue.

I stand, kiss him again before returning to stroking his ass with the strap. I drag my nails roughly over his raw skin, then pinch him. He cries out. I bring the final three blows raining down. Eliciting further howls, then sobs, deep wrenching sobs. I release him and allow him to stand for a moment. Then reattach him facing me.

I pull the timer from the cabinet, It's sand is emerald green. Time, I am obsessive about time. Each moment here then gone, fleeting, easily wasted if you don't pay attention.

The sand timer, a work of art, a precision instrument. The chambers, the size of the granules, the width of the throat, all must balance precisely or time is off.

I turn the timer, his eyes are filled with terror. He knows I am going to touch him. Push him, hard, unnerve him. I hope he can use everything he has seen and experienced so far too keep him from panicking. If he safes out it it's purely emotional as I will not be physically hurting him.

I start at his ankles just above the cuff. Drawing circles along his skin with my nails. I run my nails over his shins, drawing a single nail up the center cascading, trails back down. I move further and further up his body. His tension is rising. I can feel the little tremors of fear.

His fear escalates with each inch I rise higher along his body. My nails running over the lowest areas of his abdomen. His breath is hitching, coming in short gasps. The little tremors have turned to full scale shaking. His tears start as I pass his belly button. They are falling silently.

I run a nail over one of the small white scars. He screams. I continue dancing my nails along the unmarked areas. His stress building, his sobbing running into screams. He has one minute left. There are seven small white scars on his chest. I take a path from one to the other tracing a pattern over them all. Playing for just a few seconds with each. It has gone from screams to one long anguished howl. But he does not safe out. He is still shaking and sobbing when in release him. I push a button on the wall and a section of the trellis slides backwards providing access to my bathroom.

_"Christian, sit on the far edge of my tub. Place your feet in the tub. I am going to sit on the other end. We are both going to masturbate. When you stop or cum we will be finished. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ he sounds anxious and breathless.

I turn on the fountain hose. Christian starts stroking his cock. I start by working my nails over my throat, my hand languishes on my chin, rubbing a single nail over my lips, running my tongue over the pad gently sucking. I gently chew my lips. Ruining my nails down my throat playing over the stream of water.

Tweaking my nipples, pulling twisting, worrying them into stiff crinkled nerve endings. The water flowing gently, caressing my body, warming me, pushing me higher. Christian, watches, stroking his cock, pinching the head, fondling his balls. I see him straining, pushing into his own hand, stroking harder, pulling his balls down and away with his other hand as he is strokes.

His breathing is becoming raspy. I am running my fingers over my abdomen, running the edge of my nail over my belly button. I run a hand over my my pubic mound, following the water flow behind. The water rolls between my labia. Swirling around my swollen pulsing clit, I am at the point I can come apart at will. When Christian shoots I will too. I run my finger between my labia, spreading myself so Christian can see all of me. Then he is cumming, great shots of thick white cream. A jet splashes onto my abdomen. If I hadn't been close it would have pushed me over the edge anyway. I cum shuddering and gasping. I collapse on the floor.

It's blur of activity getting Christian settled. Finding a school to take him on is one of the most difficult challenges. Having already been expelled from two high end schools his reputation proceeds him. Fighting is one of the big taboos in this town, any other scandal easily glossed over. Finally, I call in a favor. I hate using what leverage I have garnered.

Lou has the order from Hardcore in hand. Apparently he wasn't happy, but I don't care. Christian and Elliott leave for Seattle Thursday. Grace is anxious to see her sons. Christian is still pale and withdrawn since the accident, but is recovering nicely. His rage seems to push him less.

To my still Fragile wife,

Is a long flight and a very active weekend Dr. approved? Done here Thursday, at least for a minute. Would you like company in Michigan? I could make sure you behave.

Too long apart,

Linc

To my controlling husband,

Plans Dr. approved. Well on my way back to my active self. But, I tend to misbehave, your supervision could be helpful. See you in Michigan.

Longing to be in your arms,

Elena

_"Wheels Down in Detroit"_ Linc is already here, but it is a habit I can't break. Nikko, actually put me on the plane by myself. It is odd moving through the airport alone, I can't remember the last time it was allowed. As I come down the escalator to baggage claim I see Linc. My heart practically stops, he is so handsome, and I belong to him. It's been nine long weeks since DC. He saw me in the hospital, but I never saw him.

Linc pulls me against him, crushing me to him. Capturing my mouth tasting me for a long time. I am breathless. When he releases me, he whispers _"The bastards done. His term as judge is up in fifteen months, he tries to run again I will take him down or apart, maybe both. Elena, I am sorry!"_ I just nestle into his arms, resting my ear over his heart, I listen to its strong steady beat. Home, finally my home, his arms.

The day is hot, but the crisp coolness that yells fall, seeps into the night. We stand on the balcony of our RenCen apartment, looking over the river. The lights of the bridge, the two opposing skylines, the rush of the wind. Linc runs his hand up my thighs, pushing my skirt up, leaning into me, the rail holds me in place. His hands are relentless, capturing my sex in his right hand, palming my lips, shoving two long fingers into me. His other hand rips the front of my dress, exposing me to the cold air. My nipples contract with the cold pulling my breasts up.

He twists and pulls at my nipples, pushing his cock against me. Leaning me forcefully over the rail. Pulling my nipples till I am on my toes looking down fifty five floors, to the ground below. I am terrified of heights, the screams of fear strangled in my throat only by very practiced control and breathing.

Then he is blanketing my back, biting my neck, followed by kissing and sucking the sting away. All the bites are along my spine where my hair will cover. He bites me hard enough to break the skin, licking and sucking the blood as it trickles. I am coming clenching at his fingers. My begging him to fuck me lost into the night. I can feel him spurting on my back as he pumps himself along my ass. One, hard smack to each cheek. Then Linc is pulling me up, his arms cradling me to him, whispering reassurances in my ear.

Linc is never comfortable in other people's space, he is as FUBAR as the rest of our little family. The biggest difference, to the rest of us he is Game Overall Director. (G.O.D.) As a result Lincoln Lumber owns spaces around the globe, a total of sixty five properties in forty countries. Not to be confused with corporate offices, these spaces are used by traveling Lincoln executives, primarily Linc. Technically I am responsible for them all. I have designed all the renovations or builds, and overseen their completion. But, they all have staff, and once finished demand little of my time. I could always stay here but without Linc, our homes feel empty.

It is a lazy Saturday, unusual in our life. I am on the balcony, sipping white tea, when Linc joins me. It's fun watching the crowd gather in Hart plaza. We will be in the main pavilion for the evening, performances. I would love to sneak down and wander with the crowd. I love Hart Plaza. The fountain, the Joe Louis fist, the outrageous party atmosphere. Linc would call it a security nightmare, with only one member of the security team here he is right.

I purposely try to aggravate Linc. I am noisy, clumsy and chatty all things that would usually push Linc's buttons, but he is patient and loving. I need my Linc not this strange man inhabiting his body. I go to Linc's closet, I take the things I need and go to my room.

I braid my hair, do my makeup and dust my naked body with glitter. I get down on all fours. I position the stem of anal beads between my ass cheeks. Pointed downward they run along labia. They will rub against me with every movement. I lay the smallest of our leather slappers along my spine in the small of my back. I hang a bit gag at the back of my neck with my braid holding it in place. Then I hold the chain to a pair of butterfly clamps with my mouth. I crawl towards Linc's office.

I can't look up to see his reaction, I would lose the gag. I crawl to his feet, gently lay the clamps across his knee. Then nuzzle my mouth along his thigh, he is still in his shorts and tee from working out. His skin tastes salty, he smells of sweat and masculinity. By the time I reach his crotch, he is totally boned, a nice surprise. Linc has better cock control then I have ever seen, hard, flaccid or cumming on command. Usually I have to really work to earn his erection. I mouth him as best I can through the material.

I am so hot and wet. The beads and I are probably lubricated enough to use. Linc takes the gag from my neck he lays it over the left arm of the chair. He takes the slapper swears and throws it. Then he takes the beads, inspects and sets them on the right arm. They are a very small training set only three beads, the smallest a half inch in diameter, the largest three quarters, total length less than four inches.

_"Elena, look at me."_ I lift my eyes terrified at what I will see in Linc's._ "Baby, I can't look at marks on your body right now. I have never been as scared as that plane ride home. They told me you would probably not survive. Then to see you hooked up to all those machines. One of them breathing for you. Elena, I vomited at the sight of your beaten body. It's going to take me some time."_ I don't dare break his gaze, but to see Linc vulnerable, is almost more than I can take.

Then, he pulls me up along his body, kissing me. Playfully at first, then more and more demanding. Finally, pulling my lower lip between his teeth and biting. I feel the blood pooling in my mouth, Linc taking it from me, pulling my very essence into him. Tasting me does something to Linc, his hand comes down firmly on my ass. I moan deeply trying to encourage Linc to push further. I need my husband, the man who sets my world right. He starts to pull back, I suck his tongue back into my mouth, capturing it then biting forcefully. Linc slaps my face forcing me to release him.

I am quickly head down, butt in the air over his lap. His hand comes down over and over. But, it is gentle barely stinging, not even enough to create more than a faint blush. Then he is running his hand over me molding my body. Finally, he runs a single finger over my sex, plunging into me. He pulls lubrication along my slit, playing, he lingers, massaging my small pucker. Then just the tip of his finger enters me. I take a deep breath, he continues to manipulate me, loosening me. His hand leaves me, then he pushes the beads into my dripping pussy to lubricate them. Finally, he pushes them into my ass, one at a time. Moving them between insertions.

When he finishes he has me kneel between his legs. He plays with my nipples, tugging rolling them. He clamps my right nipple, keeping the second clamp in his hand. He continues to worry my left breast. Tugging gently on the clamp, as he works, my opposing breast. The contrast between the sharp, stinging heat, and the warm, loving massage has me jumping. _"Elena, pull my shorts down and release my cock."_ He lifts his hips, when I tug at the waistband. His erection is standing tall. Finally he clamps the second nipple. _"Ride me backwards baby."_

I sit down over Linc. His arms come around me, running over my abdomen, down my thighs, then his right hand finds my core, rubbing little circles over my clit. I am climbing my breathing is raspy, gasping. His left hand pulls at the chain hanging across my chest, sending fire radiating, causing me to clench and pulse around Linc. _"I am going to cum. Please I need to cum."_ I am breathless, my voice sounds thready, and thin. _"Hang on baby." _Linc continues to push up against my rocking body. I am practically crying begging for release. His right hand finally stops worrying my clit, and moves to my right breast, playing with the clamp. He has a clamp in each hand. I know what he is going to do, the anticipation pushing me higher. Then I feel the deep final thrust bringing him, up against my cervix. He pulls the clamps off, crushing my breasts against my chest massaging the fire moving through me. I scream cumming apart. The fire in my breast, the warm flooding from Linc ejaculation, the radiating pleasure. I am awash in a sea of overwhelming sensation.

I dress for the evening by the river. It's the jazz festival, I am so psyched. A purely personal trip all my clothes are in pink garment bags. Instead of numbering them Janie has labeled them for the events. I pull the one labeled jazz festival. As I pull out the clothing, I laugh, Janie has gone over the top fun.

There is a very short silver sequined skirt, if I bend at all I will be totally exposed. A corset, silver satin, it laces up the back. A black sequined tuxedo jacket. Flat silver sandals and a fedora. I can't wait to see Linc. I try without success to tighten my corset. I give up, I love you Janie. This is the first corset in a long times without a hidden zipper. I get dressed except for my top and head to Linc's room. He takes my breath away. Janie sent Linc a zoot suit, it is black, his shirt blood red, his tie silver satin. Chains hang at the side, his fedora has a silver sequined hat band.

By the time Linc is done tightening my corset I can barely breath. My breasts are pushed up mounding in the scoop neckline. He gives my skirt a little tug, trying to cover the lower edge of my cheeks. When I remain slightly exposed he decides to make it worse, removing my thong. We walk hand in hand to the main pavilion. We have reserved seating, wealth has its privileges.

I smile as we pass the main fountain. It is a beautiful display of water. A huge torus shape, supported by two opposed steel legs. Water showers down, filling the cauldron, cascading water over the edge, the pounding sound of falling, splattering water almost thundering. Built while I was a teen, one of my favorite memories is dancing in the fountain on my sixteenth birthday. I looked old when I was young, I was dating a twenty five year old. I drank in Greek town, sweet thick red wine. Then we wandered to the river front. Several young black men had boomboxes in the plaza. I started dancing, the pulsing rhythm of the water and music was even more intoxicating. The idea of these young men watching me, seeing them run their hands over their forming erections. It was powerful, I felt strong and alive.

My white crepe dress becoming transparent as the water splattered and soaked me. Finally dancing wildly in the cascading water I might as well have been naked on display. I danced and danced, it was wild. My boyfriend fucked me right there in the plaza, pushed up, over the cauldron, forcing my face into the water, smacking my ass, making me beg for mercy. I still remember the cat calls and yells as he pounded into me. It drove me higher, and higher. It's the first orgasm I can remember having.

The music at the main stage is amazing. Linc has his arm around me, my head resting on his shoulder. The sunsets as Wynton Marsalis takes the stage. Linc pulls me into his lap. His right arm encircling me, his fingers find their way under my skirt. I feel his erection growing under my squirming butt. He whispers up against my ear. _"Take me out, and put me in you."_ I work his zipper carefully, he is already fully erect. When it finally opens, allowing me access, he practically springs out. It doesn't take much to capture him pushing down so he is completely engulfed. It is a long slow fuck, each of us taking turns, first Linc pushing up into me then me rocking back and forth. As Winton takes it freestyle for his last number, we rise with the melodious smooth tones. We both release on the long last note, held, tremulous, from Wynton trumpet. I collapse back against Linc. We are among the last to leave the pavilion. Linc carrying me cradled against his chest. I am spent, and happier than I can express.


	10. Chapter 8 - I need a shower

Christian is waiting as I emerge from the mud room. We run in silence. No one I have run with before has been able to maintain the silence. I find his presence restful. As we approach the gazebo, he starts for the kitchen. "_Christian, you'll eat breakfast in the gazebo from now on."_ When we enter the whole family is assembled. This is a family meeting. Christian, is going to find his place among us.

I smile as Christians eyes get wide with confusion. _"Christian, you start school tomorrow. Your schedule and your activities are going to be regimented. The only things you are responsible for are doing as you are told and accumulating knowledge. We will manage every thing else. First, I'd like you to meet Troy, he is your personal assistant. He will manage your schedule, correspondence, transportation, and security. Nikko is talking over the lead of your security. When you get your schedule tomorrow we will decide who can help with each subject. Do you understand?"_ This is fun, I know how to get through this.

I was so in control of my world at his age, that all the FUBAR things couldn't touch my exterior. So, regimented the demons were forever trapped. Bound eternally screaming in my soul. Time everything revolves around time. Everything black and white.

_"Yes, Elena."_ His face visibly relaxes. We all eat chatting about what the academy is like. Both Josh and Troy are alumni. One of the things that I like is the required uniforms. There is an ordered feeling, one more thing not to think about, simply do. The only option is his tie, and then only with a ten dollar donation to charity. Grace and I sold the program to the board five years ago as a way to fund toys for tots. Of course, I have donated the entire school years worth of money in his name. I hate the red on red paisley uniform tie. Everyone but Izzy and Troy leave.

Izzy goes over my schedule first, I have several calls to make, a salon and trainer appointment and plans from the engineering firm in Michigan to review. Before Troy gets to start running through Christians day. Christian interrupts "_May, I ask a question?"_

"_Christian, unless were in the playroom you are free to talk. I want to know everything about you. I cherish you, I want to take in every part of you."_ Many doms do not like their subs to speak or look up, ever. Other than at times were its about watching his reaction, I want everything. Every thought, every expression, every reaction, every emotion, mine, they belong to me. They may not be withheld in silence or hidden in downcast eyes.

_"Is this how you always start every day? Do you usually share it with anyone else." _His question sincere.

_"Yes, this is how I start my day when ever possible. It will be the four of us when I am in town. Just you and Troy if I am out of town. And on very rare occasions Linc and Chance will join us."_ I see Christian stiffen at the mention of Linc. I chose to just ignore it.

Troy goes over Christian's schedule. We have our salon and training appointments together. He also has meetings with a tailor and Janie. The tailor will get his measurements. She will assign him a stylist. Christian Grey the young upstart genius is born today.

After they leave I lean over and kiss him. It's a gentle loving, reassurance. _"Christian, I will need your log today. I need to add a few sections. We will go over the changes at dinner." _I kiss him again and we head for the gym.

Christian is subject to all the rules a Linc's kid has. Lou has agreed to be his Linc's mentor. One of the new sections in Christian book will be turned over to Lou weekly as his educational requirement. He will also have a ten hour a week community service assignment. I have arranged for him to work in the horticultural department of the zoo.

I spend my afternoon in the library working on the updates to Christians log. The soft navy leather dividers, with the silver calligraphy are so different from anything I have ever done before. I trace the word_** "Education"**_ it was one of the most painful times of my life. Survived only by complete self discipline. Tracking the details.

I finish tightening the tiny screws. I run my hand over the rough hide. I smile, time to shower, dress and then dinner. Christian new rules, I am wet just thinking about it. I have Izzy set our meal up in the rose garden.

It is a very private place, the small stone patio no more than six feet in diameter, it's border a mosaic of sea glass. The top of the wrought iron table a similar mosaic. The wrought iron chairs have ivory canvas cushions hand painted with roses.

Young men understand two things: pain and pleasure. Managing Pain and pleasure, and you can manage any young man. Utilized well they can become dynamic powerful men in control of their entire world.

I meet Christian in the kitchen garden. He is dressed exactly as I requested. Crisp white shirt, grey on grey paisley tie, black slacks, white gold cuff links and watch. Impeccable. He looks slightly uncomfortable. I have chosen a white bandage dress and my bright red peep toe pumps. Nothing else.

_"You okay Christian?" _I am curious as to why he is uncomfortable right now_._

_"Elena, I have gotten used to removing my shirt and shoes as soon as I enter the front gate. Yet you have me covered for this private dinner. I am confused." _His voice does sound truly confused.

"_I want you dressed like this for our discussions about your education. What you are currently wearing is your school uniform without the jacket. " _I take his hand, walk and continue talking. "_Going to the academy is your job. I want you to take this all very seriously. You are never to have a personal conversation. You are to actively discuss any school topic, politics, or business. Avoid religion and guns."_

_"Elena is this necessary. I hate school, people are idiots."_ He sounds angry already_._

_"It is necessary, yes people are idiots. If you pay attention you will be able to leverage what you learn. Our choice for your education was not an accident. Your class work will be challenging. There are enough opportunities to hold your interest. I have seen your psyche evaluation. Your brilliant, but unable to focus, due addiction history, not a good candidate for medication. The regimented schedule, your runs, and our play time will all help." _I stop, pull him into my arms and kiss him.

Again, my place setting has enough food for both of us. His log sits on his plate. I hand him the cup of lobster bisque. _"Christian, I know nothing has ever come easy. But, coping by fighting and angry outbursts isn't going to be acceptable. Your log has two new sections and a new obedience page. The style section you can review on your own. Please open to the Education section." _Discussions about life will be the most fun. His greatest strength is his silence, but he has to learn how to use it, instead of letting it smoulder into rage. He reads the section aloud.

Goals:

Acquire as much knowledge as possible.

Acquire as much education as possible.

Gather as much leverage as possible.

Give away as little leverage as possible.

Tracking Each Subject:

Cover Sheet:

Subject:

Instructor:

Best note taker:

Best listener:

Best Study habits:

Best Grade:

Daily Record:

Subject Covered:

Assignments Due:

Assignments Received:

Assignments Returned Grades:

Lecture Notes:

Discussion Notes:

"_Christian, do you understand the difference between education and knowledge?"_ I have my all business voice on. This is an important discussion that will be on going.

_"No Elena"_ he is still looking at the page.

_"It sounds like a simple question and most people view them as one and the same. However, the smartest most successful people see them as separate entities. Education is a tool, knowledge is a product of education, observation and experience. I expect you to pay attention to everything. Being successful isn't about being able to do everything yourself. But, the ability to read people and situations, then utilize that."_

"_The four people you identify in each class will provide you with the best study group. This is your first exercise in acquiring knowledge. I expect you to excel in every class. If you are the best grade list the second."_

_"During class discussions I expect you to appear and be intently interested. However; only speak when the discussion lulls. Make an observation based on what others have said. And pose a question. Then continue to observe. Pay attention to what the instructor finds interesting. Do you understand all that?"_

_"Wow, never even came close to thinking about it that way. Interesting approach. I think I can handle that. But why no personal conversation? Not that I have personal conversations."_ He actually sounds excited.

_"Personal things can be leveraged. I know you don't like your chest touched I leverage that. You fight, an enemy can leverage your temper. If you know those kinds of things about others you can leverage them." _ He is smiling, almost a grin._"What's so funny."_

"_You sound ruthless. I think I am going to like being ruthless." _He leans back and puts his hands behind his head stretching. I can't help but smile, lean over and kiss him. It's the first I have seen the cocky young man since the accident.

"_Christian, please turn to the second page of the obedience section. Note that two changes have been made to the first page. You are to run in the garden daily whether I am here or not. And Gideon will be responsible for your aftercare."_

CG will be on time for school

CG will be on time for every class

Each class period CG will have his instructor initial his Linc's attendance sheet provided by Leo.

CG will eat the entire lunch provided for him by Izzy.

CG will participate in three extra curricular activities.

CG will participate in the debate and young entrepreneur clubs. The third activity will be approved by EL.

CG will do ten hours of community service in the zoo horticulture department weekly.

CG will tutor a student in the subject of his choice twice a week during his free hour.

CG will do homework/study from 4:30 pm until 6:00 pm.

CG will be at the dinner table at 6:05 pm

CG will do homework/study from 7:00 pm until 9:25 pm.

CG will play Mozart while doing homework/studying

CG will turn in every assignment complete and on time.

CG will report to EL's office for assignment review at 9:30 pm. If EL is out of town report to Josh.

CG will report to the playroom at 10:00 pm. If EL is out CG may relax at home.

CG will be in bed at 11:00 pm Sunday thru Thursday.

On Friday CG will report to the subs bedroom after dinner and utilize the subs bedroom until after dinner on Sunday.

"_Christian, do you understand what is expected of you?" _I continue with my all business tone.

_"Yes Elena, but you said regimented, this is extreme. It doesn't take five hours of study for me to get A's. Five hours of fucking Mozart. There isn't one minute unplanned. I do have a life."_ His fists are clenching his jaw is tight, his voice angry.

I grab his tie, yank him toward me, and slap his face. _"You gave up having a life when you drove that boat drunk. Till your eighteen you will behave, I will make sure of it. The only choice you have is whether or not we use the playroom. Do you understand?"_ Before he can answer I slap him again and kiss him.

I loosen my hold on his tie, and sit back in my chair. He sits back in his, gaping at me. I simply wait. He removes his tie, then his cuff links, unbuttons his shirt, shrugs it off his shoulders , removing and folding it. He pulls his t-shirt over his head. _"Yes Elena" _his voice barely a whisper. I can see the memory of that day cross his face. He looks so lost, alone.

The jar of the wheels hitting the tarmac wakes me with a start and a scream. Everyone in first class is staring. Josh, pulls me up against him._ "It's okay Elena, were safe." _My face is buried in his shoulder, and I am trembling. I hear the roar of the engines, their thrust reversed to slow us. It takes a moment for me to recover enough to let go.

_Wheels down in Detroit"_ I sigh, Josh knows better than to let me sleep through landing. I want to beat the crap out of him. It will be hours before I am calm again. I take his hand refusing to let go. I let Josh lead me through the airport. This is a busy trip. I am here for a planning commission meeting. Tomorrow were in Chicago, and Thursday were in Flint.

The Linc's program has received additional grant funding. We will be building a new center. Where is the biggest question. I am leaning towards Michigan, Linc is pulling for Illinois. It's one of those rare occasions, that we disagree about Linc's for success. The car ride is quiet. I need to shower and change.

It seems like I am waiting forever. We are keeping the three rooms at the Sagmour through the project. So, it shouldn't take this long for Josh to sweep the rooms. When, he returns Josh doesn't talk to me. He leans in the driver's window, "_Take her to Eric's, do not leave her alone."_

I am out of the car before Josh can stop me. He grabs my shoulder as I head for my room. I want to know what has Josh so shaken._ "No, Elena, you don't need to see it."_ But, I do need to see it. I need to see what ever scared Josh or I won't be able to relax. _"Josh, you know me. I can deal with the things I know, it's the unknown freaks me."_ He has both hands on me now.

_"Elena, your room is destroyed. It's really bad. Linc would kill me if I let you go in there. Please, just go to Eric's. Let me do my job." _I am shaking with a combination of fear and rage. Josh, is my favorite sparing partner, right now that provides me with the advantage. Simultaneously, I bring my hands up slamming them into his arms releasing my shoulders, knee him in the groin, and slam my foot down on his ankle. I drop Josh where he stood and sprint for the room.

The smell of blood and gore hits me before I ever reach the door. I slow, take a breath and pray the smell isn't human. A doe hangs from the ceiling fan, split, guts and entrails spilling onto the floor. Blood thrown every where. Every cloth surface shredded and soaked. Words all over the walls. The most notable, _"bitch, go home or die." _A knife through a picture of me in the local paper, hangs below the words.

The driver reaches me, as I lose it. I let him lead me from the room. Josh is right, I should not have gone in. Josh, is still sitting where I left him. The cops arrive as I kneel beside him. _"Elena, you fucking broke my ankle. Linc's going to kill me. Why, can't you fucking ever listen?" _I have never seen Josh this angry.

The police interview me for what seems like an eternity . In reality it is just over an hour. I don't know what to tell them. Other than this project I haven't been here in eighteen years. I won't point the finger at anyone. Bullied and tormented by everyone around me at the time, how would I choose.

Josh, has refused to go to the hospital. I am still in my sweats from traveling. The planning commission meeting is in fifty five minutes. Josh hands me his phone. I know it's Linc on the other end.

_"There is a plane waiting at Troy Exec. get on it. I want you home now!"_ His tone is harsh and angry. I know it's the situation not me, but it still makes me cringe.

I know before I speak, that what I am about to say is only going to make Linc angrier_ "Josh needs a Dr. and I have a meeting in less than an hour. Tomorrow is Chicago and Thursday Flint. I don't have time for crazies right now. I'll humor you and fly out of here tonight. But, I am not coming home."_

_"Elena, Leo's headed for Chicago. You are to come home. This is not some random crazy coming after Lincoln Lumber. This was personal. Damnit, Elena, for once in your life quit fighting and do as you are told." _He sounds furious.

"_I'll fly after Josh sees a Dr. I broke his ankle, Linc. I might as well meet with the planning commission. I stopped running from my life when I met you. I am not about to start again now."_ I am just as angry, snapping back. It is rare that I stand up to Linc._ "You didn't run when they shot at you in Brazil. Or when they kidnapped and killed Paul in Columbia. I am not running now."_ I hang up on Linc.

There will be hell to pay. Crap, rent a goon, is headed this way. He has a phone to one ear and a determined look on his face. I am sure it's Linc yammering at him. Even with a bad ankle, Josh manages to get between me and the driver.

_"Charlie, she is a hell cat. If you think you are gonna take her against her will. I'd rethink it. Do not let her out of your sight. I'll take the responsibility."_ Josh reaches and takes his phone from me. Charlie isn't listening to Josh.

I keep backing away as Charlie comes closer. Then I trip over a parking block, landing not so gracefully on my ass. I kick his chest, shit, he's solid. Charlie's catches my foot as it recoils. Charlie, grabs me and throws me over his shoulder. I am kicking, hitting and screaming as he carries me to the car. Damnit, just Damnit, he's locked me in.

When Josh finally climbs in beside me, he looks old, tired and worn._ "I am going to the hospital. Your going to city hall. Please, stay with Charlie. We'll head home as soon as we're done. You know Linc fired me, and swears your never coming back here. Elena, this is a mess, and for once Linc isn't over reacting. Please do as your told just this once." _Josh sighs and hugs me to him. Kissing the top of my head. _"It's a good thing I work for you, not Linc."_

To my bodyguard bashing wife,

We will address your errant behavior before the garden masquerade. Until further notice you will travel with two bodyguards. A Lincoln Lumber jet will be at your disposal. Stay out of the public eye please.

Concerned for your safety,

Linc

To my concerned husband,

I will behave. I am sorry. Please assign a security detail. I'd prefer at least one female. Josh in soft cast for six weeks. I am scared too.

Your very contrite wife,

Elena

_"Wheels Down"_ we are a sorry sight as we limp off the plane. Josh has refused pain meds until I have other security. I still haven't showered, and the day is clinging to me like a cloud. I need a shower. I need a shower with him.

We are met at the plane by my new security detail. I laugh to myself. One is female, a very brutish female, over six foot tall, all muscle. Linc's inside joke. She won't be happy, off his team to guard the little missus. He hopes she annoys me, hopes I kick her butt. I don't know why he's punishing her and I don't care. I won't do his dirty work besides, I am scared. I plan on behaving and letting security do its job.

I am alone in the back of the car. Nikko and Josh are up front, with the glass closed. I am sure Josh is briefing Nikko. The goons are following. I call Gideon. I smile, first ring. My whole team first ring always. _"I need a shower. Light the candles and put lavender oil on to heat. Have Christian wait in my bathroom." _I hear Gideon draw a quick breath _"No Gideon, he is not in trouble. I need a calming shower I just want his company. Thanks, for everything." _I sigh as I hang up I just need comfort. This day has been brutal enough.

I strip in my closet and enter my bathroom completely naked. Christian kneels beside the shower, head down, hands on knees, and fully erect. _"Christian look at me" _he raises his grey eyes to meet mine._ "You are not in trouble and I am not going to hurt you." _The start of the school year has been bumpy. He has had his butt whipped more than once. Not to say he hasn't earned rewards, he has. But tonight is different.

I guide him into the shower and point to the small cedar stool. He starts to lean over it, _"No Christian, lean against it. I am going to shower you. Then you will shower me." _I can feel that he is already stressing about his chest._ "Relax, only you will touch your chest, this is about pleasure." _

I stand behind Christian. I pull the safe area of his upper back against my breasts, my erect nipples pushing into him. I reach over and dispense the warm shampoo into my hand. I lather his thick copper hair, running my nails gently over his scalp. I pull the nozzle from the wall, rinsing his hair as the water rains down around us.

I massage his face with the warm lavender oil, working my way down his neck. When I reach his collar bone, I take a soft cotton cloth from the rack, and lather it. I put it in Christians right hand, I place his hand on his chest . And lay my hand on his. I continue to massage his shoulder, and kiss his neck. Our right hands move together over his chest.

He is moaning when I take the cloth from his hand and wash his back. I am mindful not to let my hand touch his skin. I move around the front of him. I begin at his feet, lathering each one, running my fingers gently along his arch, massaging between his toes. Rinsing and stretching his ankles. Following my hand up his calf's with kisses, lingering, sucking, biting, teasing him. He jumps when my tongue catches a ticklish spot at the back of his knee.

He is clenching the edge of the bench, squeezing, his cock is bobbing. He is biting his lip, moaning. I play all around his cock never touching it. I move back behind him, and lather my hand. I begin washing him . Fondling his balls, gently stroking him. He is pushing into my hand trying to increase my maddeningly slow pace. He is begging to cum, I stroke him till he is almost there. I bury my hand at the base and squeeze stopping the moment. He cries out. His hips jump, and he whimpers.

I continue to kiss on his neck, running my hand along his thigh. I graze my nails over his balls. His hips push forward and I capture his cock in my hand. I start that slow pace jacking again. I play my nails over him, pinch the head. Then begin stroking him in earnest again. He is building, begging to cum. I am not ready, tonight his cum belongs to me it will not run down the shower drain. I drop his cock just before he can cum. He cries out again jerking his hips wildly. I move around in front of him and kneel.

I stroke him slowly as I kiss around his cock. Running my tongue along the crest of his hip bone. I nuzzle his balls, breathing hot air over them licking and suckling. When I capture him in my mouth, I simply let him fuck my face. It is only a few strokes before I am milking him with my throat. Licking him, enjoying the painful pleasure he is enduring as l continue to play with him.

I rest my head against his thigh as we both recover. He is running his fingers in my hair just staring down. He has a relaxed smile. I smile back_ "Your turn_

I stand, using his arm to pull me up. I pull him forward, and rest against the stool. At first Christian just looks around as if he is trying to figure something out. He is familiar with the shower, every bedroom in this house has an identical bathroom. The only difference is the marble used.

I smile as he lays the wash cloth over his chest. Steps behind me and pulls me up against him. He has slowly been allowed access to my body. This is the first time he has been given permission to touch all of me. He begins to lather my hair, it is clear he has never washed long hair. I bring my arms up and start washing my hair, working my fingers down its length. Christian follows my motions learning quickly. After he rises my hair I hand him a wide comb Christian, to work the conditioner into my hair and comb till it is tangle free. _"Do you know how to do a braid?"_

_"Yes Elena" _from his voice I can tell a fond memory is attached. Most likely Mia.

I fall silent again just enjoying Christian against my back, supporting me, playing with my hair. The braid falls to my waist. Christian is kissing my now bare neck, I moan, involuntarily, his lips are soft and wanton. His lathered hands come around me, massaging my breasts, rolling his finger over my nipples. Pulling the now taunt beads, kneading my breast, then pulling again. My upper body is shuddering.

He pulls the nozzle from the wall, runs the water over my breasts. Continuing his relentless play with them. He begins to play with the spray and his fingers. He has watched me play, he was very observant. Trailing the running water and his fingers over my body. Playing over my navel, just brushing the edge. Running the water through it. I am writhing against him.

He slowly moves back. Now I am the one grasping the edge of the stool. He kneels at my feet, lathering them. playing. He begins rinsing them with the spray. He runs it up my arch, I cry out rocking my hips. He does it again, following it with his tongue. I am breathless panting begging.

He works his way slowly up my legs. The water, his fingers, his tongue, all dancing over me. He runs the water over my labia, pushing his fingers into me, running his thumb over my clit. I cry out again. His mouth moves up my abdomen as his fingers continue to drive me higher.

He is biting my nipples, leaning into me. His cock is pumping in the crease between my thigh and abdomen. His mouth is on my neck. He is kissing me. I feel his cum flood warmth over my belly. I spiral out of control, cumming. We slide to the floor in a spent heap.


	11. Chapter 9 - Masquerades Abound

It is still dark as we run through the garden. Only the shimmering path lights guiding our way. The last few weeks have been peaceful. Christian and I have fallen into a comfortable routine. He is still struggling with control. He has not yet given himself over. It is a struggle he will face repeatedly. One I still know well.

Just as Hollywood has its award season, society has its fund raising season. My calender is full, so is Christian's. The next two weeks will be a flurry of activity.

The annual Coping Together masquerade is being held at the embarcadero with a Mardi Gras theme. I have coordinated the effort for Grace this year. Next year they will hold the party in Seattle, but they are barely settled in their new home. It was just easier to hire a large interesting venue here.

Grace, Carrick and Mia arrive on Monday, they have borrowed a yacht and are docked in the harbor. Christian is staying with them. He seems more at peace lately.

Janie arrives to dress me at four. I will be wearing a harlequin costume. Janie starts by dusting me with gold glitter. My makeup is deep and rich. Sparking sapphire over one eye, emerald over the other. Both lined with gold, extending into curly ques. Framed by outrageous dazzle eyelashes.

My sapphire and emerald mask a mirror image of my eyes, frames them perfectly. It molds seamlessly over the bridge of my nose and my cheeks. Leaving my gold painted lips perfectly showcased.

The costume itself, is a corset with a ruffled skirt. The diamond pattern continues the sapphire and emerald colors. The lace trim is black, I wear traditional ruffled bottoms. My legs are covered by fishnet stockings and gold high heeled boots.

As I look at myself in the mirror, Janie places a gold enameled collar around my neck and matching cuffs around my wrists. My hair cascades around me in a fountain of golden curls. A jesters hat looks precariously perched, but is secure. I take a deep breath, perfect, absolutely perfect.

As always it is a magical night. The embarcadero has been turned into a new Orleans street fair. There are band stands, food carts, street artists and side show acts. As always Grace and Carrick are the perfect hosts. Dressed as the King and Queen, they preside over the different acts. Strolling along mingling with their guests.

I watch as Mia pushes girl after girl into both Christian and Elliott's arms to dance. I find my self dancing with Carrick, I have danced with him often, it is comfortable. Both of us using it as a respite from the usual small talk. Neither of us speak.

Elliott cuts in. Although we have gone back and forth over the plans, finalizing our vision, I haven't seen Elliott since the incident. He whispers into my ear _"Janie sent me a Jack Skellington costume. May I assume Sally will be accompanying me to the party in Michigan?"_ I giggle and blush. Elliott just has a way of making light of life. He always has. We finish the dance just holding on, quietly moving to the smooth jazz tones. I do not dance with Christian.

Then Carrick hosts the auction. Finally the fire works display. I am tired by the time I am back in the car. The goons managed to be discreet. I am glad to have them to a point. Shadowing me closely at events like this seem a bit much. But, I have promised myself I will behave. There are no leads on who destroyed my room.

I miss Linc desperately. Paisley Moore will send me her photos from tonight. I will put a thank you book together for Grace and Carrick. They are staying through the weekend to attend the Garden Ball. Hopefully I will be able to present it to them then.

To my beautiful wife

Caught red carpet images of you arriving at the embarcadero. You looked amazing as always. Sent Janie, a sapphire and emerald bracelet to thank her. You always make me proud. Home Saturday.

See you in my playroom,

Your enamored husband,

Linc

To my distracted husband,

I breathlessly, await your arrival. You know how I love to play dress up and you love my hair red . Wilma and Fred for the boo, Roger and Jessica for the Ball. Sweet dreams.

Hanging by the chain to your heart,

Elena

I wake early, stretching, this is one of the busiest days of my year. I pull on my sweats and Nikes. I miss Christian. The mud room door slams as I simply push past it already running. I fall into my stride. I love the simplicity of running. It's like the passing of time, or the flow of blood. Smooth, steady and rhythmic. A music all of its own.

The garden is almost ready. The riot of color, splashes of white opalescents, it will all shimmer in the sunlight, and cast an eerie glow under the black lights. It's part of the magic of today. The enchanted wonderland. Where statues of puppies and clowns, turn to gargoyles and ghouls. The giant sucker tree, where the children can choose from giant pinwheels of color, turns to grey barren branches waving ominously in the moon light. Watching night fall and the atmosphere change from the bright and cheery to dark and foreboding. It's a game of light and shadows.

Then I hear heavy footfalls behind me on the path. It is not the soft tread of bare feet. Crap, who the hell is in the garden. Damnit, I am not carrying a panic button. When will I learn to listen. Where are my goons when I need them.

I know this garden better than anyone, only Gideon is even close. I push my pace, looking over my shoulder, the footfalls are out of my sight. That's easily accomplished in this garden, there are no straight paths. Where? Think Elena, where can you hide in plain sight?

I am dressed in all tan, almost the color of my skin. Think, Elena, think. The tall grasses, I could easily disappear. How? how do I not give away my plan? I just keep to my run, just before the rose garden. I sprint, there are six paths leading to the small patio. If I can get through there unseen, I have a chance.

The heavy footfalls are still pacing me, not closing the gap, but not falling behind either. I run with everything I have left. I jump, grasping the arm of the bird feeder. I drop between two clumps of fountain grass. I lay flat, controlling my breath slow steady swallow. My lungs are screaming for me to pull large gasping breaths. Control, control, control, don't move, barely breathe, no sound.

Shit, the footfalls slow to a walk, he's circling the garden. Concentrate, don't move, don't breathe. Stay still, don't panic. Then it starts the sound of pounding water, the fountain garden that mimics the grass has turned on. It is 6:00 am. I lose the footfalls. The only good thing, I am now officially late. In two minutes, Izzy will hit the panic button.

A boot comes down on my back, as my braid is grasped at the back of my head. A hood is quickly pulled over my head. My wrists and ankles are zip tied. Don't fight, wait, find your moment, endure until escape. How many times have we done drills. This is it, Linc's worst nightmare, my fears personified, I try to relax, just hold on.

Then I am being hoisted, thrown over a shoulder. When I come down over the back. I really do relax, I know this body, I know it as well as I know my own. Linc! Home! Oh am I in real trouble! Keep the charade, do all that you have been taught. Do what is asked.

Linc is walking briskly through the garden, one arm across the small of my back, the other hand coming down over and over on my butt. He knows the game is over, and the real fun has begun. Linc is purposefully playing on my worst fears. He knows sensory deprivation is brutal on me.

We enter the house. Keep breathing, the air is limited, the hood is hot and dank. Panic keeps rising, I push it back. We're climbing the stairs, the first landing, stairs again, the second landing, then down the hall. Linc's playroom.

He folds my calves up, kneeling me as he rolls my body off his shoulder. My ankles and wrists are connected by another zip tie. Linc slides the panic button into my right hand. He plans to push me to safe out. It won't be overwhelming pain or pleasure that causes me to panic. It will be simple fear.

I hold as still as possible, not flexing, barely trembling. I feel him begin to cut my clothing away. He snips the front of my sports bra. I can feel it separating, slowly exposing me. I feel the crop run along the edge of my collar bone, down my sternum, the cloth finally releasing the nipple, the sting as the crop snaps across it. I jump pulling my shoulders releasing the other breast. The crop catching the nipple immediately. Then nothing. Still, quiet.

Breath, Elena, breath. It's only been seven minutes, breath. Damn him, Damnit Linc. I am trembling. Nine minutes. It's just nine minutes. Tears are threatening. I am not hurt. I am safe. I can be calm. I can repeat that mantra all I want. My mind understands, my body however has an entirely different reaction. Damnit Linc, eighteen minutes, my body is being wracked by silent sobs. I will not safe out, I won't.

Then his hands, are on me. He is massaging my breasts, pulling my nipples. His hands slide down my belly, pushing my sweat pants down around my knees. He clips the sides of my thong, completely exposing me. He runs his fingers along my labia, caressing me. Running the tip of his index finger over the sweet spot. Plunging into me, I arch and try to rock against his hand. I am pulsing and clenching around his fingers. Then they are gone.

Count, Elena count. Stay calm you can do this. Breath, breath, It's only been twelve minutes. I am shaking, racked with sobs, tears falling. My hand are flexing, I can't do this, at fifteen minutes, I tap the panic button setting off a yellow warning. The crop comes down on each nipple, up against my labia, then rains down several stinging blows on my ass. It pulls me back from the abyss.

Again nothing. The heat, is becoming more oppressive, more dank. I can barely breath. The fear, simple terror of the unknown silence. Five minutes, it's only been five minutes this time. I am shaking, sobbing, crying. Pushing down the panic, holding on. Breath, Elena breath, your safe. Relax. I can't. I can't catch my breath. Then I feel it, Linc sets something on each breast. There is movement soft ticklish, scuttling. One tiny prickle, then two. Hair dragging. Repeat. His pet spiders.

Then I am screaming. I am gone. Over the edge, I cannot maintain. I can't think. Why isn't it stopping I am yelling, red, screaming. It's trapped, trapped and muffled under the hood. I remember the panic button in my hand. I squeeze and hold. Red.

Linc pulls the hood from my head. The flashing red light is harsh on my eyes. Esmeralda and Sade are crawling over my abdomen. I am still screaming. He removes them as quickly as he can. But, I am still freaking out. Gasping for air, shaking.

Linc pulls me against his chest, kissing me. Holding me to him. Rocking me slowly. I am fighting his hold_ "Elena, let me cut the ties. Baby, please."_ I can't bring myself down. I can't calm, the sobs shake my whole body. I am still, screaming. The sound raw, so disembodied it echos through me. He manages to snip the tie that holds my wrist to my ankles. Linc tries to lay me on my side. I howl. He tightens his grip around me.

_"Elena, baby, your okay. I've got you baby. Please Elena."_ Linc is begging me. "_Breath baby, Elena, breath."_ The sound stops, everything is black and I am drowning.

Warmth, I am drifting back. Water laps at my legs, Linc's hand is gently washing my face. I lay across his chest held tightly in his embrace as the tub fills around us. My body is still racked by periodic sobs but they are subsiding.

Then Linc is kissing me. Running his hand playfully along my thighs. Down my legs, massaging the welts around my ankles. I simply float in the water over him. He pulls first one wrist then the other to his mouth, kissing licking and suckling the welts. I need to feel him. I need him filling all of me.

I pull me knees around him hovering, waiting. His hands find my waist. He pulls me down over him. Crushing me against his chest. He holds me there, simply joined to him. Not moving, simply clinging, one to the other. There are tears on Linc's face, I have never seen him cry. I trace the line up one cheek with my tongue. His eyes flutter shut and I kiss the lid. Then capture the last tear as it falls from his other eye tracing the line back down his face.

Maybe this is love.

Linc stands, never releasing his hold or his penetration. I pull my legs around his waist and rest my head against his shoulder. Linc carries me to his bed. Laying me at the end, he moves my legs from his waist to his shoulders, supporting my butt in his hands, my shoulders on the bed. He begins fucking me, long slow strokes. Watching my face, smiling. _"Play for me baby play"_

My hands find my breasts, massaging, kneading, pulling. my nails run along my neck over my abdomen. I am rising, I run my finger between us. Running my nail along his cock, as he thrust. Sucking the juices from my finger. I am panting I continue playing.

I push my already arched back higher. Pushing Linc deeper. He's kneading my ass, his nails are digging in, he is ready. I begin begging. Asking for relief, I need to cum and he needs my words._ "Now" _a fact, a statement, and a command. Growled as Linc thrusts and collapses over me. I explode on command, shuddering and whimpering into Linc's chest.

I love seeing all the kids in costume, trick or treating through the enchanted garden. Running laughing. They come from all sorts of challenges. Thirty charities and churches brought children today. This is my gift, the day I celebrate the children that I will never have. I send catalogs to the organizations. The kids pick their costumes, makeup artist are sent to each gathering site. A bus shuttles them here and back. It is a day they will never forget.

The gazebo has been turned into the wicked witch's candy house. Bread crumbs line the path, Hansel and Gretel, human statues, sit on a bench along the path. The treat must be taken from the oven. It looks hot and scary.

The pergola has been draped in spider webs, and ILM has been kind enough to provide some very spooky ghosts and very large spiders. Grab your treat from the skeletons hand, if you dare. After this morning I am avoiding the area.

We have the path to the pond paved in gold. Around a bend in the path the Medusa sits atop a large rock. At the end of the path a mermaid sits on rock just inside the pond. The mermaid throws treats to those who make it past the Medusa.

Twenty three stations in all. I think we have out done ourselves this year. Linc is hilarious as Fred Flintstone. Huge club, big feet that appear bare, and that yell _"Yabba dabba do."_ I feel light hearted. The large white beads holding up my short white halter dress are fun to play with. My hair pulled in a bun. My feet actually bare. We stand near the exit, handing gift bags to each of the accompanying adults.

The last bus pulls out at 5:15 pm. The race is on. The caterer has arrived, the bar stations are being set up, the lights changed. One set of actors is leaving, another is arriving. I retreat to the sanctity of my closet, Janie is waiting. The best transition of the day, from Wilma Flintstone to Jessica Rabbit.

My hair is down, the way Janie pinned it this morning left the perfect waves. The red sequined dress, cut down to here and up to there, looks exactly like the cartoon dress. There is even extra built in boobs, and I am already ample. The long blue gloves feel elegant. Red crystal louboutin's, yum.

Linc comes in before putting his rabbit head on. He pulls me into my arms. Kissing me deeply, _"you make me very proud, to call you my wife."_ His large rabbit paw reaches into the pocket of his ridiculous red overalls and pulls out a blue box. I open it. It is a heavy chain bearing a flat heart engraved, Roger Rabbit's Bunny. I squeal in delight, and hang it around my bare neck.

The gazebo looks like it is engulfed in flames. Melodic piano music resonates. It looks like a macabre music box. Couples dancing, spinning, the candelabra flickering. I stand on the balcony over looking the party. I needed a brief respite from the crowd. In five minutes I will start the auction. Take a deep breath, and now go. We are holding the auction on the lawn by the pond. Followed by a laser light show to classic Halloween music.

I will be acting as host and emcee. Linc's costume makes emcee duties almost impossible. He stands on the stage and yells _"Help me Jessica"_ The spotlight finds me at the top of the path. I do my best Jessica Rabbit crooning_ "Why don't you do right" _as I stroll down the path.

I take the stage to a round of applause._ "Ladies and gentlemen on behalf of Edgar and Elena Lincoln, Roger and I would like to welcome you to the tenth annual Garden Ball Auction. Please be generous all funds go to Linc's for success internships." _The auction takes a little over an hour and raises $750,000. We have indeed done well.

As the last car pulls away Linc takes off the rabbit head. He pulls me against him and kisses me. I know what's next, he's leaving me. I can feel it, I know him too well._ "Baby I fly out at sunrise. I'll see you soon. I promise."_ He's kissing me again. His hand squeezing my ass through the high slit in my skirt. It will be Thanksgiving in Stockbridge, before I see him again.

I wander back towards the house as Chance pulls away with Linc. Someone is playing the piano in the gazebo, the music sad, dark, heavy. The faux flames have been extinguished, the lights are low. The shadows dance, the young man at the piano is lost, the music moving him. Christian, he has stayed. The Grey's set sail for Seattle in the morning.

I am quiet as I enter the gazebo. He is dress all in black, even his face is darkened. When I asked earlier what he was, the answer was simple._ "Just a shadow."_ What a long journey this young man faces. Will he ever feel solid? Whole again? Has he ever?

The piece ends. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and kiss his head. He turns his face up to me, I kiss his forehead._ "You look amazing tonight."_ He whispers.

_"Play more for me please."_ It's just more than a breathy whisper. I lay across the piano lid, and let the music take me into the night. The whole experience of it. The sound, the vibration, the cool night air. Then it stops. He is standing just staring down at my face. My head thrown back, eyes barely open, fingers tracking over my body, in a world all my own.

_"Elena, I need..."_ He can't finish the sentence. I pull myself up. Sitting at the edge of the piano I pull him into me, my arms around his neck. I kiss him, it is long and lingering. _"What do you need, Christian?" _I kiss him again letting him lead._ "You Elena, just you."_ His smile is contented. His arms rest around me, locking us together.

The fund raiser in Michigan is a costume party. It will be my first trip back. Linc is pushing me to cancel. I will not. Elliott and I are making the trip. It is an in and out day, we plan on being on the ground for five hours, that's it. It's a sixteen hour day, doable.

It's an early morning, I drag myself from the warmth of my bed before 4:00 am. I run alone, I need the peace, the space to quiet the screaming in my head. I crest the ridge, and head down the path through the pergola. She stands at the foot of the path, her ears perked, looking for the footfalls, snout flared testing the air for my scent. Her large brown eyes find me as I stop astounded. We stand there neither of us moving, our eyes locked, our breath held. Then she looks away, turns and walks across the path. She walks gracefully, into the clearing by the pond, then bounds, out of sight. A doe, a female mule deer, the first I have ever seen on our property.

I cannot move it takes several moments to regain myself. The memory overwhelms me. I sit trying to catch my breath. Why today? Is it an omen, should I listen to Linc and cancel? I walk slowly back to the house, simply contemplating today.

Christian, is waiting in the kitchen garden, pacing, a concerned look on his face. It is 5:13 I am late. I had intended to be back at 5:00 and send him on his run. But, then there was the doe. I kiss Christian, _"Sorry, have a good run. I'll explain later."_ The disappointment evident in his face.

I shower, I am trying to make up the time. But time isn't like that. It has its own pace, it's own beat. Steady, unforgiving. Janie and an artist are waiting in my closet. Janie hands me a one piece white body suit. Then starts to explain the plan for painting me. We will be working both here and in flight.

I turn myself over to their handling. I can not shake the memories of the two does. I have a sense of foreboding. Deep breaths, this is important. The $150,000 check from Lincoln Lumber and Grey construction will be the biggest contribution tonight. It's a simple community fund raiser. A spaghetti dinner, silent auction, games and treats for the kids. Simple community, is there really any such thing?

_"Wheels Down in Troy"_ we land twenty two minutes ahead of schedule. Damn time, just Damnit. Why can't the schedule work today. I need the control that time and schedule bring. Deep breath and hold. Relax slow, exhale, breathe again, again.

I stand in front of the mirror, I know the image my body presents is Trompe L'Oeil, but, still the stitch lines appear raised. My skin is a grey white, I am smudged and gritty looking. I look like a patch work doll, that's been torn apart and resewn, one to many times. I feel the way I look.

My red hair is straight, it appears stringy, and grungy. Pale blue eyeshadow, on eyes that appear to large for my face. stitches across one eye, stitch lines extending from each corner of my mouth. Janie pulls the brown patch work dress over my head, and slides soft brown suede ballet flats on my feet. I have never looked or felt so tattered.

I turn to see Elliott standing there, his jaw slack, staring. He is built perfectly to play Jack. Broad shoulders, thick chest, thin waist, narrow hips, and very long legs. His tuxedo, pinstriped, the chest opening is tight and open too wide. The large bat bow-tie, frames his chin. His hands have been painted, so they appear skeletal. He has his Jack Skellington head tucked under his arm.

_"Elena, you look..." _He can't find the words. I don't think this is the Sally he expected. I always play the vamp, this is nothing like that._ "Unexpected"_ I throw out. It breaks the tension. I laugh, it's a nervous laugh.

The first thing to run on schedule, the car arrives at exactly 7:35. We arrive at 7:55 and are escorted in through a back door. The event is being held in the gym of the north end high school. The first fund raiser where I spoke was here, the the Halloween Smash twenty two years ago. I am going to make the same speech tonight.

Ted Peppier, is making an introductory speech. Talking about all the programs the club offers. How this night makes a huge difference. Then he is introducing us_ "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce Jack Skellington and Sally, also known as Elliott Grey and Elena Lincoln."_

This is one of the reasons I like local events. All of the activities are at the beginning. People can leave as they please. We will be out in three hours. I step to the microphone. "_First, on behalf of Lincoln Lumber and Grey Construction, I'd like to present you with a check for $150,000 to update the technology in your mentoring program. Second, the silent auction will help fund the gymnasium activities and organized sports. The items include..."_

Spaghetti, garlic toast and green salad. Standard fair, whipped up by the local fire fighters. A local radio station is sponsoring the event. The DJ is up beat, the music classic rock and oldies, it is actually a relaxing trip down one of my few good memory lanes.

Neil Diamond is playing as Elliott pulls me onto the dance floor. We dance several songs before a man dressed a Zorro taps on his shoulder to cut in. I go willingly into the man's arms. As he pulls me in he whispers_ "Would you like to go to the park with me?"_ I freeze, a scream is lodged in my throat.

The man is being ripped from my arms. I hear the unmistakable sound of flesh and bone, meeting flesh and bone. The sound of bones breaking. The scream of pain. Elliott has the man by the throat, he is yelling "feel all high and mighty now?" He is about to swing again when the mask slips, it is a young man. There is no way he ever attacked me. I scream and dive between them taking the brunt of Elliott's punch in my ribs.

The three of us are sprawled on the floor when the officers reach us. They separate us. Is this day going to get any worse. Three hours later we are all at the hospital. The officers have taken our statements and have decided to let the prosecutor sort it out.

What a nightmare. Zorro, actually David, does special telegram delivery. He was told it was an inside joke. That I might slap him but that I would laugh it off. This poor young man, his nose and cheek bone are broken. I have arranged for him to receive whatever medical care and reconstructive surgery he needs. We will workout a settlement later.

Elliott's hand is broken and so are three of my ribs. The body suit Janie put me in kept everything in place. We will be in the air in four hours. Only nine hours behind schedule. Will this never end. Both the police and my security believe this is related to the previous attack on me. I want this over. But, I will not run.

To the man who chains my heart,

Delayed in Michigan. Again a Gray male quick to settle things with his fist. Very long story. Ask security and Leo. Police may have a lead in my attack. Three broken ribs, limping home again. Thank you for the garden parties.

Your battered and broken wife,

Elena

To my wife who is beautiful even when she's not,

What an amazing choice of costume, so unlike you. Glad I received images from Janie before I got images from Charlie. Have already been briefed, private investigation ramped up. You will be receiving a new panic button wear it always. Please, I could not bare to lose you.

Holding your chain grasped tightly with both hands,

Linc


	12. Chapter 10 - The Reading Assignment

We are all gathered at the bar in the kitchen. Josh is officially giving a security briefing. Really, we are pulling me back together. Josh holds out what appears to be a simple gold locket. One side is engraved with the word_ "breathe." _The other engraved with the word _"Linc's." _It is strung from a thick double anchor chain. It lays right at the top of my breast bone. When pressed till it clicks it sets off a panic alarm. Josh hangs it around my neck and secures it with a small padlock. Breathe side up, I cannot remove it.

I am not allowed to run or lift for six weeks. I am already moody. I cannot breath without pain or security. Ask me, I'd say they are actually one and the same. Izzy, pulls the old stand by out of the oven, vegetable lasagna. We all eat heartily.

We need a distraction. Things haven't been this tense since Paul was kidnapped in Columbia. Linc won't put what belongs to him at risk and I belong to him. The security team has been increased to twenty four, eight members, three shifts. That doesn't count Josh. One on the gate, one on the water tower by the pond, one on cameras, three stroll the perimeter and two on me . It feels like a fucking prison. A gilded cage is one thing, this is something else entirely.

Christmas is just weeks away. It's the only thing we can think of that isn't difficult. We decide to feature Santa this year. _"I can't wait for your version of Mrs Claus, Elena."_ Gideon teases. The conversation degrades into stories of Christmas horrors past. All of us laughing till we cry when Izzy recounts the Christmas she learned to knit. I think I still have the lopsided hat with the pompoms. I need to rest again.

Izzy finds me in the refugee of my closet. I am curled in the corner of a chair. My hair is braided, I wear the t-shirt Linc wore under his Roger rabbit costume. It smells of him. My knees are pulled up against my chest, I am hugging them to me, rocking seeking some sort of solace. I am terrified most of the time, his words echo in my head_ "walk in the park._ The police have cleared my original attacker, he died in a car wreck five years ago. No one, I told no one, not till Elliott. Who else knows? How?

_"Are you going to see Christian? He misses you desperately. He doesn't understand. It's been a week Elena. He's seen Elliott, he knows what happened."_ Izzy voice is concerned. She loves me, it is one of the few things I am sure of in this world.

_"How Izzy? not like this. I am shattered. My world is spinning out of control. How do I keep his world from spinning? if I can't manage my own. How do I be with anyone else?" _I sound desolate, empty. I haven't left my rooms in days.

_"Elena, do you need Linc? Does he have to come home? Do you need me to call him?"_ Her voice is shaky. She has seen me a mess before. But, never this bad. When the world around me spins out of control, my inner control is lost. I only have two reactions, I run away or I hide. I have been hiding.

_"No, Izzy, don't do that. I'll come to dinner I promise."_ I sound tired. She sets my breakfast tray on the table.

_"Elena, they'll find whoever it is. It really is going to be okay."_ Izzy kisses my forehead, and runs her hands over my shoulders. She is old for her twenty eight years.

_"Izzy let's have steaks out in the gazebo. See if you can get sweet corn and strawberries. I'll make the sweet biscuits myself."_ I see her smile, me in the kitchen is always good for my soul.

After lunch I shower and dress. I head for my office. At least I have managed my correspondence. It's been a nightmare. Of course the tabs are saying my marriage is in trouble. Showing pictures of Elliott with me, and the fight. Friends send emails asking if it's true. Flowers and gifts have arrived daily. Stop, I just need peace, I want to run. Not run away, just run.

Christian log is on my desk. My heart stops. Then I see the note.

Elena,

Without you my world is out of control. There are transgressions we need to address. I (miss) need you. It is Friday, I will be in the white room.

Christian

Christian hasn't changed anything about the white bedroom. It is still very stark and modern. He spends many nights sleeping there, abandoning, the more traditional furnishings of his second floor suite. It is the only starkly modern space in the house. And then only because it can easily be redecorated.

I run my hand over the rough exterior of his log. I open to the punishment page.

Failed to read Thomas Hardy assignment (got A on paper anyway)

Did not listen to Mozart while doing art homework (got an A)

Kissed Mandy Jenkins

I slam his log into my desk. Broom Hilda storms into my office hand on her tazer. What the fuck did she think was going on. I am alone in here. _"Out!"_ I point at the door. I am shaking with rage.

I head for my room. Compression gear, I have it I know I do. Fourth drawer, I double layer it and pull on my sweats, tie my Nikes. I hit the buttons to connect to Josh._ "Alert security I am going for a run through the garden." _ I don't wait for response I am out the door.

I can't manage a real run its mostly a fast walk, but I am moving. Every piece of my body needs this. I hear the soft footfall of bare feet. I recognize the gait, it's Josh. He's only had the soft cast off a week. I stop and wait.

_"Elena, you have not been cleared to do this. Please you can't do this. Linc will have both our heads." _He is bent over massaging his ankle. I laugh softly.

_"I can't do this, huh? Looks like you can't do this Josh._ He is scowling at me. _Sit down, give me that ankle. _I massage and stretch Josh's ankle. He hasn't been using it. He needs to strengthen it. _I really am sorry about this you know _

We walk the garden, its a nice compromise. Josh and I haven't really talked in awhile. He fills me in on everything. Which is really nothing since every lead has been a dead end. Activity is already beginning in the gazebo. I head for the kitchen.

It's the seven of us. Josh has dismissed the rent a goons, since both he and Nikko are here. Its a cool evening, the air is crisp. Fall my favorite time of year. I am wearing my favorite Alice and Olivia jeans, wide leg trousers. A white cashmere sweater, very fitted, and a pair of wedge sandals. Christian, chest bare, nipples erect, his jeans hanging just so, his feet are bare. It's the first time I have seen him, since I caught Elliott's punch. I feel just as breathless now.

I run my hand over his shoulder, his skin is cool to the touch. _"Would you like a shirt Christian?_ I ask it quietly. No one needs to hear his answer. _"Only if it pleases you Elena." _His eyes drop waiting. I run my fingers through his hair and take my seat. It's been a good day. As I stand to leave, I lean over Christian and whisper _"my closet."_

My first stop is the library, then my office, finally my closet. Christian kneels to the right of the door, dressed just as he was at dinner._ "Sit in one of the chairs please._" I hand Christian his log and a pen.

_"First I have removed any restrictions on how I will touch you from your log. I am done with that nonsense. I have indulged your preference not to be touched. But, you can't respect my need for you not to touch others. So, you will give up that comfort. Second, your safe words will only be used for physical discomfort. If I am not physically hurting you, you will be punished for using a safe word. Do you understand?_

He has visually paled_. "Yes, Elena."_ His voice soft and fearful. To punctuate my point I run the tips of my fingers up his chest, and squeeze his pec in my entire hand. I hold for ten seconds and release him. He is gasping.

_"Next, you will cross out both references to your grades and add the entry was cocky in my punishment log to the list of your transgressions. Under the punishment for failing to read please write, Be read to by Elena while bound."_ I hand him my first edition, Tess of the D'Urbervilles. He fingers the leather cover.

_"Please tell me what happened with Miss Jenkins?"_ I am seething, he his mine. I refuse to use her given name. Jealous, not really, simply possessive in the extreme. **Christian, is my most cherished possession. I will not share him.**

"_We were in the elevator. It got stuck. It happens all the time. She got really upset, she has claustrophobia. I was trying to calm her down. She was biting her lip. I don't know I just kissed her. Then the elevator moved and it was over"_

_"Do you know the consequence for kissing Miss Jenkins?"_

His face looks up at me, _"yes Elena"_ he looks contrite and scared. He is remembering, more than the simple confinement of the chastity device. The humiliation of being arrested in it. Of having fully adult men handling him while they removed it. Them making rude and demeaning comments. He blushes deeply while I let the punishment sink in. His reaction drenches me, making me needy and wanton.

_"The art homework I understand. So please submit a playlist to accompany each of your courses. I will edit and approve. Do you understand?"_

He breaths deeply _" yes Elena"_ he smiles. Gideon has talked to me. Christian has an amazing connection with music. I felt it the night of the garden ball, as well. The Mozart is stifling to him.

_"That only leaves your cocky attitude. I am sure by the end of the weekend you will be well punished for that. Now, please remove your clothes. We are home for the weekend you will remain naked." _I smile. He has been here ten weeks, it is the first time both of our weekend schedules are completely clear. He quickly removes his jeans and boxer briefs, folding them neatly. He is fully erect.

_"Follow me."_ I reach out and take his hand. I can tell he is still uncomfortable with being naked. We walk past both Nikko and Broom Hilda in the hall. Both follow. I stop and turn._ "Get out of my house!"_ I stab the code for Josh on the hall panel. _"Pull security out of the fucking house. Only you, Izzy, Gideon, and Troy inside. I have had enough."_

I hear Josh laughing _"Done! Welcome back Elena. " _Both Nikko's and Broom Hilda's radios crackle. I take Christians hand and we continue to the main floor. I have a surprise for Christian. We walk to the room across from the library. I am almost giddy. I punch in the code for the door.

We enter the ballroom. It was designed to be acoustically prefect. It is theater in the round. The stage at the center will accommodate most small bands or a DJ comfortably. The room can be set up for almost any occasion. The smooth dome ceiling perfect for projecting lights and images. The hard wood floor perfect for dancing. All the electronics built into the wall panels and concealed. A control room behind a two way mirror.

A full size black grand piano sits center stage, a single spotlight illuminating the keyboard. I hear Christian draw in a deep breath. I turn, he is relaxed, his jaw is slack, his eyes are wide. _"It's yours. It will be here till you have a place of your own. Please play."_

He sits naked illuminated by the single light, he stretches, his shadow spills across the keys. He begins to play. It is sad, lilting, almost haunting. I know this piece. It's an oboe concerto by Alessandro Marcello, but not quite. I remove my shoes, and dance. Christian plays and I dance, we are both content.

I am happy and relaxed. I walk up behind Christian, I run my fingers through his hair, down his spine. He gasps, but submits to me touching him._ "It's time to go to the playroom. Take my book with you."_

This is going to be a long weekend, one I will enjoy thoroughly. I change in my closet. I pull a simple white silk slip on. I take a fresh pair of white cotton gloves from the top drawer. I leave my hair down cascading softly around me. I go to the playroom. Christian kneels next to the door. He has placed the heavy book on the seat of the leather wing back chair.

I prefer the aesthetics of ropes but I will be repositioning him several times so using cuffs and belts will be easier. I place cuffs, at each of his joints. They are soft leather, not meant to support, simple restraints. I place thick belts around his body at his upper chest, below his pecs, waist, upper arms and upper thighs. Finally a collar around his neck.

_"Christian, please sit on the foot stool, with your back against the pole._ The foot stool matches the wing back chair, it is a two foot by three foot rectangle. Currently a post with a cross bar sticks up from the back. The bars have four rows of holes, eyelets on rings can be snapped into place in almost any position, pointing in any direction. I grab a bucket of carabiners.

I adjust the bar so it runs behind his shoulders. I have him simply rest his arms along the bar, and hold on while I work. I attach his arms across the bar, and then his torso, down the back to the post. Each belt or cuff clipped to an eyelet. I use a piece of rope to connect each ankles to eyelets hidden at the back of ottoman's legs.

I position the chair so I am directly in front of Christian. I pull my knees up, placing my bare feet directly between his open knees. I open the book across my silk covered thighs, protecting the leather from my skin. I pull on the white cotton gloves.

Like Christian, all of my Thomas Hardy papers were written from observing the discussions. Watching the instructor, figuring out what they wanted to know. How they were effected by the book. Then writing to their point of view. It is an exercise in observation and controlled thought. It is a priceless asset, one Christian is learning.

I have never made it past page four. I get to the line _"...you were made knights of the Royal Oak..." _It takes me home. It takes me apart in a single heart beat. Without my scholarship, I would have Graduated from North Royal Oak high. I would have been a Royal Oak Knight. All that came after that fateful choice of a Birmingham shrink, different. Would I be more like Eric, more ordinary, or god forbid Tessa, a whiney bitch. I reach the line. My breath catches, I look at Christian, he is watching my face.

I draw a breath, then a second. I run the arch of my foot up his leg, from his ankle to mid thigh. It elicits a moan. A deep raspy sound. His abdomen ripples between the belts. His heels lift, his calves raise, his thighs flex and his cock bobs. I take a deep breath and continue. For the next hour Christian is a captive audience as I read aloud from Tess of the D'Urbervilles.

I lay the gold book mark on our page. Remove my slip and gloves. Fold my slip, place the book on top, then lay the gloves on the pile as well. I turn my attention to Christian. He is not in a difficult position. It is actually one of my favorites. However, prolonged lack of movement is very uncomfortable.

He has maintained his erection the entire reading without any direct contact to his cock. I have provided some stimulation. Occasionally spreading my knees, running my toes along his thigh. one hand turning pages, the other trailing over my body. _"Did you enjoy the first part of your reading assignment?" _

_"Yes Elena"_ his voice strong and full. This is just the beginning. Each time we read this will become more difficult, more painful.

_"Christian, I am going to release you. I want you to kneel head down, ass in the air, the long way on the bench." _I start at his collar, releasing the carabiners, letting my hand mold his body, guiding his movement. He moves into position with no hesitation.

I run my nails over his ass. Tickle his balls and stroke his cock until he is begging too cum. I let go , his hips jump, pumping his cock in thin air. Mournful moans, and pleading escape.

I begin spanking his ass, deep thudding blows. A practiced motion, my hand is tensed, my palm arched and hard. There is none of the magical sting that a cupped lose palm and fingers provide. The blows will leave my hand as sore as his bottom. But it has the desired effect, his moans are deeper, more pained. He is a nice deep red when I finish.

"_Take a break Christian we will start again in fifteen minutes." _I run my finger through those Cooper locks, and kiss him before I head to the kitchen. I grab the small plate of finger food Izzy left for us. Then use my bathroom, there is a natural pink flush to my skin. My hair has a slightly strawberry cast the red almost all washed out.

Christian is kneeling in position next to the door when I enter. _"Christian, please kneel on the foot stool. I want your thighs resting on your calves, your ankles on either side of the post and your knees spread. Keep your back against the post." I_ adjust the bar so once again it runs along his shoulders.

I attach him to the bars again. His arms spread, torso straight, ankles close together. I attach a spreader bar to the cuffs directly above his knees. I adjust the bar so they are spread an additional six inches. His thighs are stressed, his groin being pulled. He is uncomfortable. I am going to prolong this. I sit naked at the edge of the bench, I stroke him, gently. Just enough to bring his level back up, to hear him begging again. I watch as his cock bobs and weaves, as he struggles to simply pump his hips, something his restraint won't allow.

I feed him, pieces of cheese, small bits of meat, fruit. I take a grape and pop it inside of me. His eyes grow wide as a second and then a third disappears. I feed him the rest of our snack, allowing him to suckle my fingers, and nibble at my palm. I lay back so the edge of the chair is supporting my shoulders, and the foot stool is under my ass. I spread my legs so they lay over his thighs, pressing down to increase his tension.

I use one hand to spread my labia. I allow the nail of my other index finger, to trace me, draw my fluid over me. His breathing is harsh, his cock, bobbing, throbbing, begging of its own accord. I slowly insert just the single index finger, using my muscles to push the grape forward. I use the nail to gently remove it. The exterior is slick and warm coated in my juices.

I arch my back further, using my abdomen to roll up. Bringing myself face to face with Christian. The position is a strain for me, my legs spread, ass against the spreader bar, back now curved out, chest pressed forward. I push the grape into his mouth. It will be warm and taste of me, it will pop and cool sweet juice will wash through his mouth. I watch as his face lights up with wonder. I can't resist my urge to kiss him. We repeat the process with the other two grapes. I am panting. I make him suck my fingers clean, licking my palm still tender from spanking him.

I pull my slip and gloves back on. Resume my position in the chair. I leave my knees spread, the book resting on my thighs, the white silk puddling gently under my cheeks framing Christians view of my sex. I begin reading again. This hour seems much longer than the first. My captive audience is clearly much more stressed. The same can be said of me.

I unhook his ankles first, allowing him to pull his legs out from under himself. I can see his expression change as the blood begins to move back into them. The tingling, burning, pins and needles sensations on a grand scale. I start fondling him, running my nails along his cock, waiting till the sensations are less intense to release his arms and torso.

I mold his body with my hands as I release him. Massaging, helping the blood to flow back through his arms. I kiss him, then guide him into position, facing the opposite direction, I want the feel of him in both of my palms. His cock pumping against my already tender palm. My other hand punishing his ass. Being ambidextrous has its perks. I use a much more relaxed hand, the blows are loud, they are stingy, snapping my fingers against him on impact for effect, the color returns quickly. I continue right up until he is begging to cum, right on the edge. But we are going to play once more. I pull both hands away. He cries out pleading, his hips jerking.

This position is difficult, most mens backs can't handle being in arch for long. I have seen Christian working on flexibility in the gym. He can do a back bend, he can walk his hands in almost to his ankles, but his center of gravity pulls him over. This arch should be something he can achieve. I am going to push for thirty minutes, plus however long it takes him to cum in this position. This will be his only chance to cum today.

I let him recover. This is new, he needs to get his head around what I am doing. I remove all of the restraints from his body. I grab four bundles of natural filament rope off the trellis. I massage his body where he was restrained. I tie cuffs around his wrist and ankles, it is a skill that takes practice but once learned can be done fairly quickly.

_"Christian please stand in front of the chair, so your ankles are against the legs."_ I guide him into position. I connect his ankles to the legs. He looks a little confused when he is facing forward. I walk behind the chair._ "Christian, I want you to rest your shoulders on the top edge of the chair, so you can drape your arms down the back." _I put my hands directly behind him and allow him to bend into them. I guide him till his back touches the chair keeping him centered. I let him find his position, then I secure his wrists, spreading his arms only slightly wider.

His arch is amazing. His body perfect, I tweak his nipples, he moans and thrusts. I run my hand down his chest to his cock and stroke him till he is right at the edge. His head rolls back, his shoulders push down, His rib cage heaves, his hips push up, his thighs quiver and his calves flex.

I squeeze the base, wrap my other hand around his balls and pull him onto his toes. He emits a cross between a cry and a moan _"I want you to hold this position as long as you can. I want you to call yellow when you are getting close to being unable to hold the position long enough to cum. I would like you to make a half hour. When you yellow, I will lube my hand and allow you to fuck it until you cum or red out. I will be playing with you gently with my other hand. Do you understand?"_

_"Yes Elena"_ his answer a plead. I sit on the foot stool and read. Christian is amazing. His hips occasionally jump, his cock bobs, he flexes his legs and shoulders. He makes it. I lube both of my hands, I wrap my right hand comfortably around him and allow him to pump into it.

He moves like a wave, rocking his hips up, his abdomen rolling, his chest heaving, the the wave receding and his cock pulling back. The pace and of the intensity building steadily. With my left hand, I fondle his balls, stroke his thighs, I run my index finger along his taint, and around his hole. I push just the tip in and run my thumb along his taint pressing firmly. His head is back, his eyes closed, he is lost in the sensations.

Then I feel it, he has reached the point of no return. It's an odd change, subtle hard to detect. Men recognise it right away. They have stroked their own cocks for as long as they can remember. But teaching a woman to recognise it is difficult. Usually one of the last skills a female Dom truly masters.

I don't want cum on his face. I am not done with him, and I do not lick the cum off my own subs face. He is cumming, the first shot goes over his shoulder, each brings a moaning cry, a jerk of his hips. It leaves a splattered trail access his chest. His thighs flex and shudder. I milk him keeping my hand just below the head.

I am done punishing him tonight, his cock is so over sensitive. I really just want to play. Grab him. Run both thumbs up his shaft, knead the head with my thumbs. Make him howl in painful pleasure. But he deserve a respite from my play. Comfort and care.

I release his wrists allowing him to sink into the seat of the chair. I kneel in front of him, my intent to release him, but I can not resist him. He has slouched, his bent knees are pushed forward, his ass barely on the seat. His head is back, his mouth open, his arms simply hang along his sides.

There is a sheen of recent use to his cock. His balls rest against the leather seat. His now flaccid cock curls restful over them. The spread of his legs making a perfect frame. I rest my head against his thigh just watching him.

I know the moment he has drifted off. His breathing changes. The little tension remaining around his mouth and eyes drops away. He looks soft and peaceful, I watch him rest for a long time. Tonight there is no need for Gideon, I will care for him myself.

I release his ankles. I lean into him, pulling my his arms around my neck. He clings on, pulling himself closer. I pull him slightly forward wrapping my arm across his back just below his shoulders. My other arm slides under his legs near his butt. When I lift, he pulls himself against me.

It is so much easier to carry someone who wants to be carried. A struggling victim or dead weight is challenging. In some ways this is the most trusting of me Christian has had to be all day. Christian and I are similar in weight. A weight that should be difficult for me to manage. It is moments like this, they are why I train relentlessly, why I lift heavy. He is safe in my arms, I will not drop him.

His head rests on my shoulder as I carry him. He is murmuring softly, incoherently. I lay his body on his bed. I send up a silent thank you. His room is softly bathed in candle light, the air filed with the scent of lavender and chamomile. I dip my fingers into the warm oil and begin at his feet.

I rub each toe separately running my fingers between them. Stretching, pulling relaxing them. I use my thumbs to rub and stretch his arch. Holding his ankle pushing forward on the ball of his foot stretching it. I rotate his ankle, massaging my way up his calves. Gently massaging the muscles as I flex them. Relieving the strain. His thighs, so long and supple. His cock is already, fully hard begging for attention, even as he sleeps under my tender care.

I gently roll him so that I can massage his butt. Although gently used today, I want him ready again in the morning. I massage him thoroughly, eliciting moans, as he pumps his hips against the bed. I begin at his finger tips, repeating the process along his arms and shoulders.

I pull the sheet over him , tucking it around him. He moans and rolls. Only one word escapes his lips, it is pleading, and soft. _"Please,"_ he is still in a twilight like state. His word, not a conscious thought, but I cannot leave him. I sit back on the bed, pull the sheet back down. I run my hand over his erection. I stroke him, allowing his body to direct my pace. It is slow and loving, his eyes never open. When he cums it pools in the hollow of his abdomen. His body becomes still and restful. I retreat to the comfort of my own room.


	13. Chapter 11 - Giving Thanks

It's a cold morning even for November. I pull on a t-shirt over my sports bra. It's the last time we will get to run together before l leave. It's a long trip, I will be gone twenty two days. I fly to the Berkshires today, Thanksgiving with the family. I am headed down the stairs two at a, time when I hear his footfalls behind me. We run in silence. Our body's now so used too each other, our footfalls sound as one.

As I round the bend to start our last lap around the pond, I whisper,_ "Race you" _and sprint. Even racing we are side by side, stride for stride all the way to the Gazebo. We fall through the door together landing, in a heap. Laughing, only to catch Izzy and Troy in an intimate embrace. How have I not noticed before now. They let go of each other, both blushing.

We eat together. Troy is headed to his dad's in San Francisco. Christian and Elliott are headed for Seattle. Only Josh and Gideon will be at the house. I have the goon squad with me. I know I shouldn't call them that. They are highly trained highly professional security personnel. But to me they will always be the goons. It's the only way I can shrug off their presence, and live my life.

This trip Izzy will go with me. It is Thanksgiving, she is my closest family. I am her only family. They gave up on her when she was a mess. She gave them up when she got happy. Linc and the old man will even be there. We will have feast with ggma and ggpa, in Stockbridge.

We will all laugh ourselves silly in the kitchen. Something will go wrong and pawpa will say _"We shoulda just gotten dinner from the 'Red Lion Inn'." _Real family, real happy, real thankful. One day a year everything real.

We are meeting Linc and Chance tomorrow.

Chance is a Grace rescue, His parents were killed by a drink driver the night he was born. Just thirty weeks and two pounds. A prick of a Dr. said _"He doesn't stand chance, when he codes let him go." _ A neonatal nurse called back_ "He's our Chance to prove your wrong!"_ It stuck and when he lived it became his real name.

In foster care from birth he moved into our first center the day he turned eight. Back then the old man still ran the company, Linc ran the main office and I ran the center. Chance followed Linc or me around the center. He would just show up at the office. Linc finally just gave up, the boy became his sidekick, and it has just never changed. I think if we could have children, Linc would be with them, like he is with Chance I love to watch them together.

But, tonight I will drink at the line bar with cousins and family I haven't seen in a year. We are wheels up, in less than three hours. But, with the private transport, the private terminal, the airport is easy.

_"Wheels Down in Albany" _We could land at a small airport close but I love the drive across up state New York. It is part of visiting my family. My trips to Harvard with my dad. The long private conversations. I was just sixteen then, it seems a lifetime ago. Now I just get on a Jet, I go where ever. I don't worry about the cost. That was a different time very long ago and far away, but closer than a single breath still today.

I wake late, well, I wake on California time. I grab my garment bag. When I unzip it there is a Bogner garment bag stuffed inside, head to toe Bogner. I head for the mud room. It is the mud room in this house, that was the reason I insisted on having one. I grab my boots and my snowshoes. Ggma always said it was the trick to clean floors. I head out into the air.

When I was a Michigan girl this was cold, as a Cali girl this is just obnoxious. It is fucking twenty below. Thank Janie, I am four layers thick, the cold still hurts the few small spots of exposed skin. I head across the back of the house and up the mountain. I'll check out the trees looking for the one we will cut tomorrow.

The goons are struggling along, snowshoes are unique, they take practice. I giggle to myself. It's a painful endeavor to try an keep up with me, no matter what I am doing. And I enjoy it that way. There is a fire lookout station about a quarter mile up. I plan to climb it. It's been awhile since I have really looked around here.

The view is breath taking. I look at the 1860's manor house now restored to its original beauty. 12,500 sq feet on four floors. The main floor is primarily designed for entertaining. The second floor is the family living space. The third floor bedroom suites, called apartments at the time they were build. The fourth floor an artist's nook. The huge chimney stack at its core, and six smaller ones around the perimeter.

It was built by a lumber industry family, a fact I find funny having married a lumber guy. A widow turned it into a boarding house at the turn of the century. It was filled with the artists and those that followed them to the Berkshires in the 1920's. It came into our family after the great depression.

I restored it, the design my master thesis. The build my wedding present from Linc. It cost us nearly a million dollars, as we ran behind schedule, I fought with the historic preservation society. I dug through news article after news article in the archives. I found proof of original colors from society descriptions. Learned this homes interesting history.

I worked side by side with the restoration crew everyday and drank beside them at the Line bar every night. I thought, I would forever smell of turpentine and paint stripper.

There is the Stockbridge bowl and Tanglewood. It is the summer home of the BSO. I have laid on that lawn on a, warm summer evening caught in the cacophony of sound. There the Stockbridge school, no it's, the Desisto school now. I have met the director once. I think it was the first time Linc ever took me to a private party. He is an odd man, many find him charismatic, I find him creepy. It was that same summer, the year we were married. Time for reminiscing is over.

I strip to my fleece in the mud room hanging my ski pants and coat to dry. It's 9:18 am. My shift in the entertainment kitchen starts at ten. I head to the butler's kitchen, Linc should be here. I round the corner and see him. As, always he takes my breath away.

Linc leans against the counter, his long legs crossed at the ankle. The smooth line of his grey wool trousers, accentuates them. His thick cable knit sweater only a shade lighter, hugs his sleek torso. His dark curls look damp and gently tussled. His green eyes are sparkling. The few radiating wrinkles, and grey steaks only add to his appeal. Framed by the doorway he could be a GQ cover. Rich laughter fills the hall. Edgar Sr., Linc, and Chance.

These three generations of men, simply project power and affluence. I remember the fight three years ago when Linc set up the trust fund for Chance, and paved the way for him to eventually inherit Lincoln Lumber. Eager Sr. made the mistake of assuming a different relationship between Linc and Chance. The two men almost came to physical blows before they settled the issue.

I sweep into the room, buoyed by the sound of their laughter. I wrap my arms around Linc, resting my head on his chest. His hand comes up automatically around me, pulling me tightly under his shoulder, and kissing my forehead._ "You are beautiful all wind kissed baby." _

_"El, I was just telling Chance about the work you did on this house. It's hard to believe it will be fifteen years this summer. I'd like to throw you and Linc a second Wedding here to celebrate."_ Eager says it, as if, it is just a casual thought. There is nothing casual about Edgar Sr. Does he see us as slipping apart?

"_You'll have to ask Ggma, you know she rules this roost. I'd rather throw her a ninety fifth birthday party. But whatever, you know I can't resist a party." _I pull out of Linc's arms. _"Now excuse me I have kitchen duty in half an hour and I need a shower."_ I get a quick peck from Linc and a hug from Chance. Edgar Sr. winks as I head out.

It reminds me of the first time I met the old man. I was head down over Linc's shoulder. He was smashing my ass, lecturing me about splashing and keeping the water in the hot tub. We rounded the corner headed upstairs when I saw him on the couch, and screamed.

Linc stopped, turned around, smoothly said _"Hi, dad!" _Then finished the trek to the bedroom, completely unaffected. His dad winked at me as we headed up the stairs. I on the other hand was truly shaken. When, Linc set me down, he said_ "Get dressed baby. So you can meet my dad." _I lost it.

_"Your father saw me naked with you spanking my ass. What the fuck are you thinking? I am not going back down there."_ I made my best angry face and stopped my foot.

_"Elena, his is not really gonna care. In fact he is probably thrilled. He has never seen me with a girl. He thinks I'm gay."_ Truth is, my husband is a gay man, who happened to find a partner he fits with, who also happens to be a woman._ "And, besides I am about to introduce him to my future wife. I think it will be okay."_ My jaw must have dropped open in shock. I had only been with Linc for six weeks. Marriage had never even crossed my mind.

When I finished dressing, Linc took my hand, looked down at me _"Elena, when you fell across my lap at that party, my life changed. Your under my skin and I don't want to lose you." _With his other hand he slipped a ring on my finger _"Elena, please say you'll be my wife." _I looked down simply staring at the biggest diamond I had ever seen. It's heart shape cut and anchor chain band, have become the true symbol of us.

He was right Edgar was thrilled. Allison, his mother took longer. She's been gone four years now and I still miss that woman everyday. She taught me how to be Elena Lincoln power wife. She started Linc's for success. She built this amazing program. And I get to try to carry on her legacy.

She left us with such grace. She died of pancreatic cancer, six weeks after she was diagnosed. She chose to let the disease run it course, simply finish her life. Only the four of us knew, we hid here. She died comfortably, here, surrounded by love. Linc's very small family and my very large extended family have become one.

I let the shower wash my tears away thinking about her. About how much that woman effected who I am, anything good and real about me I got from her. Everyone else in my life has taught me how to hide.

I head down to the entertainment kitchen. It's huge, it is really a catering facility. It makes sense, in this house. The main gallery can be set up to seat two hundred and fifty. Today there will be sixty three of us. We range in age from ggpa ninety seven to baby Gia just twenty two days.

My shift in the kitchen will be with all the women in my generation. It's how it has always been and always will be. The oldest generation plans the menu, and handles all of the first shift work. The next generation makes all the side dishes. The young women make the salads, relishes, fruits and cheese. The younger girls set tables and put the food out. It is an amazing dance.

It's why I know all the women in my family well. Though none of them really know me.

Tessa is already in the kitchen when I arrive. As usual I get to make the broccoli and cheese casserole. There are three sets of prep/cooking stations. Tessa and I are across from each other. I want to know who's with us. Tessa has been great this trip, so I am a little on edge.

Izzy comes in and I am instantly relieved when she's at the prep table adjacent to mine. As I hug her good morning, she hands me a tea. My recently married cousin Anna is with Tessa. It's Anna's first time in this group. She got married here last spring.

It's going well, after the incident over the fourth I was a little nervous about Tessa. Then she asks _"You wanna go to the park in the morning" _I am half way around the table with my arm in the air when Izzy grabs me. _"Hang on Elena, it's probably innocent."_ Then she asks Tessa_ "Why did you ask that?"_

_"I saw her snowshoe up the mountain this morning. I thought she might wanna cross-country ski tomorrow. You know at that park thing down the road." _Tessa shrugs her shoulders in confusion.

I relax, that statement just sets me off_ "It's called the bowl, and of course I am going, a lot of us do, its tradition." _Now, I just sound aggravated. Suddenly I am ready for this day to be over.

The fourth floor artist suite is reserved for me. It was always my favorite set of rooms. I love it's widow's walk overlooking the mountain. I lived in it during the remodel. I spent the early days of my marriage here. My husband building the Lincoln Lumber offices in Boston, I rebuilt this house and its grounds. He spent his weeks in the city and his weekends with me.

This is my fantasy scene, mister and misses normal. Linc plays this just for me, just once a year. We crawl into bed. I am wearing a short flannel gown, Linc's in a night shirt. He pulls me into his arms, spooning, he fucks me slowly, till we both cum. Vanilla, very middle America.

The barn, looks nineteenth century from the outside, sleek and modern on the inside. One end houses the maple syrup distillery. The other a modern stable. Completely, separated. I am in the stable with Bess and Harry, they will pull the sleigh. I always laugh at their names. Ggpa is obsessed with the Truman's.

Linc strides in dressed for our little adventurers into the woods. We're taking the kid up the mountain to get a tree. The men will put it up this afternoon and we will all decorate it tonight.

Linc teases me as we hitch the team. Slapping my ass with the straps to one of the bits. Slapping at my thighs and breast with the crop. They are dull thuds through the four layers, I am dripping wet none the less. It is a promise of things yet to come.

The tree safely untied from the sleigh, Linc and I lead the team back into the barn locking the doors behind us. Both of us are meticulous, working side by side, we unhitch the horses. Removing each piece of equipment. Toweling sweat spots, caring for the animals. When completely unharnessed we lead them to their stalls. Finish wiping and brushing them down, we water and feed them each a carrot. Their real grooms will take care their actual feed.

We return to the equipment area. I strip as soon as we enter. We wipe down each piece, carefully hanging each in its spot. Then it's time. I have been waiting for this moment all day. Linc points to the empty padded saddle rack. I sit on it obediently. Again this is my scene, but one Linc thoroughly enjoys.

He lowers the bridle ring so it hangs just above my head. I reach up and grab it. Linc pulls up so my torso is stretched and I am barely seated. My legs are long and the saddle rack is short, my knees are pushed up even with my feet flat on the floor. Linc makes this worse, kneeling between my legs he taps my foot. I push up so just the balls of my feet are on the floor.

My hips push forward as my knees go up, completely exposing me. Linc quickly ties my ankles to the saddle rack. Then He grabs a piece of strapping from the repair table. He begins by slapping my breasts, leaving clear red streaks, with brighter edges. I can't decide whether to scream or moan so I bite my lip and breath through my nose.

Oh God he is working my thighs, there's no where to go. Oh, Crap that stings, he catches the wetness on my thighs. Sending waves through my abdomen. He drops between my legs. Bathing each of the marks with his tongue, licking at me. Running his hands over my legs. I am moaning, begging him to touch my sex anything. I am on fire.

His hands find my breasts, kneading. Pinching over the marks he left. Tears are streaming down my face, my mouth is open emitting moaning cries, my breasts are on fire shooting heat directly to my core. I am pulsing, my core is shuddering, my abdomen rippling.

I am going to explode. I can't help but push my hips up at him. He pulls his hands away. This is worse, now I am moaning and begging. He slaps my face hard, _"Were going to quiet you down. Hands on the back of your head." _He pulls me down, shoving his cock into my mouth, he pushes completely into me. He just holds me there. I pulse my throat around him. I count, he will let me go at fifteen this is a show of control.

He starts fucking my mouth. It's Linc's turn to take himself right to the edge. He won't cum yet. I most certainly haven't earned it. His pace is standard Linc, brutal. All I can do is submit. I feel it, he is reaching the point. I pulse and roll my throat, trying to push him. Everything in me is so alive.

He pulls out of me, steadying himself, his hands still over mine, holding my head. I am pulled against his abdomen. His scent trapped between us is intoxicating. I want to pull him back into my mouth, suck him, play with the length of him. Lavish attention on every inch of him. I nuzzle against him. He moans between gritted teeth.

_"Hands back up baby." _I reach up and grab the ring with both hands. Linc unties my ankles from the rack. He pulls me into his chest, kissing me. _"Baby I want you kneeling."_ Linc simply wraps his arms around me, lifting me off the rack. I fold my legs up under me, he sets me back down Then he pulls the ring up so I am fully extended. Linc grabs two more ropes, quickly creating cuffs around my thighs and tying my ankles up. My legs are folded in half, knees wide apart. Spreading me completely open.

Linc is circling me with the crop. Bringing it down, randomly. My breasts, my abs, my back, my ass then up against my labia. I am moaning, twisting, jumping. It stings and I am almost at overload. There isn't one point on my body that isn't alive and begging.

Then it stings at my hip bone. I pull up, lifting my knees off the saddle rack. I am flying. Linc's arms are around me immediately, pulling me back, settling me back on my knees._ "Baby, you can't fly. Your only half restrained. If you fly alone again. I'll restrain your wrists so you don't fall." _

He's biting my neck, pinching my nipples, I am pushing back into him. I just want him filling me, pounding into me, driving me up. Then he starts with the crop again.

I am jerking, pulling away, jumping. My cries, deep and mournful. My knees pull up, I am airborne again. I manage not to swing and bring my knees quickly back down. Linc drops the crop, stepping in front of me, he pulls me into his arms kissing me. _"Time to fly baby."_ He pulls me up plunging into me, kicking the rack out from under me. Linc holds my waist, pummeling me, rocking me forward and back, swinging me on the ring.

I am rising, I won't be able to maintain much longer. My pleading is becoming increasingly frantic. Linc is climbing. I am pulsing, contacting over him. I need release._ "Baby, I got you, drop your hands to the floor." _Linc growls, as my eyes close and head falls back.

I use my abs to roll down. The muscle control causes rushes of fire. I am going to explode I can't wait much longer. My clit rubs against Linc, as I go from curled to arched, deepening Linc's thrusts. I spin out of control as my hands reach the floor. My rippling orgasm pushes Linc over the top.

I am resting against Linc in the butler's kitchen, sipping warm cider. Linc is sucking, licking, nipping and biting at my neck. I feel so relaxed and secure.

Ggma comes in, shaking her head. _"Fifteen years, the two of you still acting like newlyweds." _I laugh. Ggpa and ggma are ninety seven and ninety four, they have been married for seventy eight years. I caught him grabbing her butt and kissing her neck in the pantry just yesterday. _"Ggma, the apple don't fall far from the tree, even on a windy day."_ Her laughter tinkles in the air as she turns and leaves us alone.

As I slide down the last segment of banister I can smell the aroma of fresh baked cookies. The tree is up, it's guide wires secured to the ceiling and floor. My mother is waving me over.

She pulls me into her arms _"Are you happy baby girl?" _

I pull back looking her in the face, _"Yes, mom, happier than I've ever been."_

_"Please, Come home for Christmas." _She sounds weary.

_"My schedule tight, but if you can live with Christmas eve and day. We'll come home, all of us." _Linc has never been in my mother's home. She understands my condition.

_"I'll hang the wreath and light the candles"_ She smiles

On the back of our invitation to thanksgiving is a name. You by two ornaments for them. One for the family tree and one for their home tree. Usually identical, but sometimes not. You tell why you choose the ornaments after the person opens them.

It's time to decorate the tree. Each of us has chosen five of our past ornaments. Each of us will get a new one today. I have baby Gia's name. I got her two Crystal hearts, each is engraved with an acorn. The backs are different:

May you grow as strong as an Oak

May your roots grow deep In love

When I look around this room I often wonder where I came from. I am so different from this big warm loving clan. With such rich traditions. So Norman Rockwell. I laugh at the inside joke.

Linc pulls me up against him. I fit so perfect, nestled, molded to him. I have on black wool stirrup pants, riding boots, a classic red and white wool ski sweater, a white cashmere turtle neck and a chinchilla head band. Linc is in his grey wool trousers, a similar black and white sweater with a black turtle neck. We could be a ski Vermont ad.

I get my box, it is from Tessa. It is beautiful, silver foil embossed with roses tied with a pink ribbon. I slowly open it. When I remove the tissue, it reveals two does nose to nose. One mule the other a white tail.

Linc manages to keep me from dropping it. I almost scream, I am coming apart. Linc whispers in my ear for me to breathe. I can't, how does she know. Then she starts to speak. Linc arms tighten around me. _"Come on breathe with me baby."_

_"Right before I married Eric we went for a run in Tahquamenon Falls park. We stopped on a ridge looking over the river. The views here remind me of that day. We saw that group of deer."_ I relax and almost laugh, only Tessa could call a herd, a group. _"Then you thanked me for making Eric happy. I picked a different deer for each of us." S_he seems to relax when she finishes. I hang the White tail deer on the tree.

We hug everyone inside and run for the comfort of the limo. It's a three hour ride from here to Cambridge on a good night. Today it will take four. We should arrive at the private party around 9:30. I will be well prepared by then.

This is Linc's favorite party, our Harvard friends. The more power one has the more power one wants. Kinks run rampid among the powerful. Perhaps it's just the ability to exercise those kinks, mixed with a sense of entitlement.

You don't have to look to modern society to confirm it. You just need to look to the past. The Romans, the Greeks, the French... the list just goes on. The upper 1% simply do as they please in any society.

As we pull onto the highway Linc hands me a cup of tea. "_It's too cold for a young woman dressed like you to be hitch hiking."_ He smiles at me. I know the game, the scene. Most of our sex life is scenes. We have had more free play in the last year than our entire marriage. It has been an interesting change.

_"My friends left me at a party. I have to get back to Harvard. I have an exam tomorrow." _I play at acting frantic. We are in one of Linc's personal cars. He keeps it here in Boston. It's a Cadillac Fleetwood 75 nine seater. I love Detroit Classics. And this is definitely a classic.

_"Don't worry baby. Well get you home in time."_ I know I am too play slightly woozy, as if the tea was spiked. I do not take drugs or alcohol while we play. I am responsible for my safety. I am to bring any threat to Linc's attention immediately. Linc will drink but never to intoxication. I am very good at play acting though.

I stretch out. Leaning back as if trying to find a comfortable position to rest. My eyes flitting open and closed. Linc captures my wrists. I struggle against him. He zip ties my hands to the seatbelt guide. Holding my legs still with his body. I buck against him until he produces a knife. He uses it to cut open the front of my t-shirt exposing my breasts.

He begins tormenting my breasts. Pinching and pulling the nipples. Slapping them, then he Is kissing me. I resist. He's biting my lips. Pulling at them, pushing. I submit and kiss back. Our tongue dance, swirl in my mouth. The warmth of our bodies, our mingling breath, our mouths. I am still writhing under him but now I am not struggling.

He's kissing his way down my face. Nibbling, sucking, licking, then blowing warm breath. I am moaning. Trying to wiggle under him. The seam of my jeans rubs against me. I jump and cry out. Simply managing to push myself further up against Linc.

His lips are on my neck. The warmth bringing me higher. I am moaning my breath ragged. When he reaches my _**"breathe" **_heart he sits up. He's straddling my hips. He pulls a small key from his pocket. He reaches around my neck and unlocks the chain. He turns it over so the _**"Linc's"**_side is up and re-locks it. He puts the key back in his pocket.

_"Now that we've established who you belong to, can I release your arms and undress you. Or do I need to finish cutting your clothes off." _He smiles. I am nodding and begging _"please"_

Linc cuts my wrists free. Pulling each wrist to his mouth, suckling the welts, massaging the blood back into my hands. His hands are back on my breasts. Kneading the soft mounds. Pinching at the small purple striations left by the thin leather strap yesterday. My moans are becoming increasingly drawn.

Linc captures my left nipple between his teeth, pulling it out, stretching it. He bites down. I squeal, wiggling. Warmth spreading through my abdomen. He repeats the action with the other nipple. He slides my shirt and jacket off, over my shoulders. His mouth travels down my body, as he slides onto the floor.

Linc slides the ballet slipper off my each of my feet. Running his fingers over the soles, tickling me. Making me once again jerk and beg. His hand start up my legs, massaging them, ticking, playing. He runs his hand between my legs. Rubbing the already soaked seam of my jeans.

My hips free I begin to ride his hand. Pressing, rubbing, pumping, kegeling trying to relieve the growing tension. I am begging, about to pass the point of no return when Linc pulls his hand away. I am left crying and begging. My breathing is harsh, I am sobbing from simple need.

Linc unbuttons my pants, pulling them off in one motion. I am completely naked and at his mercy. _"Now, let's get you dress for a very special Christmas I am going to take you to."_

_"But, my exam I need to get home please."_ Adding an edge of frantic fear to my voice. That is the thing with scenes, my body is reacting all the ways it should, but I am still over controlling my thought process. There will be a point that I lose myself to the scene. Not yet, but soon.

_"Don't worry you'll be at your exam. I am very strict about education of all types." _Linc is amazing at adding sinister sexual innuendo into his voice. He grabs a large case from the seat behind him. It will contain whatever I am to wear.

First Linc pulls out a leather collar. It is red, it has white rabbit fur trim along both edges. It is wide enough that the fur will tickle both my chin and collar bones when I move. Linc places it around my neck. Purposely moving the fur against my skin. I shiver from head to toe. It is the single most possessive representation of ownership there is.

Next he pulls out a red leather bra/harness. It is a series of thin leather straps held together by rings. The bottom strap is lined and edged in the white rabbit fur tickling at my rib cage.

He fondles my breasts, playing with the nipples rolling them between his fingers. He's kissing my upper chest, breathing hot air over me. Running one hand down my abdomen teasing me. Causing both the fur and his fingers to tickle me . I am squirming uncontrollably, breathless begging him to stop. He laughs softly, making a raspberry on my stomach. My muscles spasm, my abdomen rolls causing a wave of heat and passion through my core.

Next Linc produces a set of nipple clamps. It's my turn to smile. They are meant to be extremely comfortable when simply being worn as jewelry, but tightened they are exquisite. They are a custom set of bobby pin clamps. Instead of being a deep U's they are an oval with a decorative tightener at each side. The top is a small red jewel bow, the bottom is beads hung on chains to resemble mistle toe. He tightens them till I wince.

I like my costume already. It will be fun torture all evening. Next, Linc pulls out a medium sized set of eggs. He drops them in his scotch on the rocks. They will go in me very cold. I shudder at the thought.

Next he pulls out a pair of forearm cuffs, they have chains every two inches. They run from my wrist to my elbow, lined and trimmed in the rabbit fur. When Linc is done attaching them to my forearms, I simply lay my arms together across the small of my back. I turn my back out him. He hooks my arms together, forearm to forearm wrist to elbow. My favorite long term position.

He pulls more up against his chest, kissing my neck. Biting me, he is purposely pushing me close again. I am noting at my lips trying not to beg. My moans are pleading, and deep. My hips are rocking on the seat. Linc whispers _"Your going to kneel on the floor leaning over the seat for me."_ He guides made into position .

His hands are running over me. One up my back the tips playing, dancing. The other over my flanks, mirror ing the moves. He brushes his fingers over my labia. My whole body convulses, I shudder and try to push back against his hand. He pulls it back, bring it down on my ass, a swift cascade of blows too fast for me to count. I am breathless, silent tears running down my face.

Linc runs his hands over my newly red ass. Kissing and licking, then pinching and biting. I am squirming, every move tickles somewhere or everywhere. My sex is pulsing, grasping at nothing, clenching. He runs his index finger over my labia again, this time, sliding it between them on the pull back. I cry out, begging.

He plunges two fingers into me, working me with his palm. I am rocking against his palm. His other hand comes down, sending heat through me, I am sitting pulsing around his fingers. Just as I teach the point of no j return he pushes first one then the second ice cold egg into me. I scream.

Linc blankets my body, whispering on my ear_ "breath baby, breath through it."_ I can't process, I am lost, spiraling. Linc just keeps whispering to me until I am back. Then he is kissing my neck again driving me back up. Pushing me higher. His hands are on my thighs. Then he's kissing my ass,

I feel a glob of lubricant hit my pink little pucker. Then Linc is massaging me, relaxing me. Every touch pushes me closer. The balls are moving, warm enough now to be pleasant. I am groaning and trying to push back. He pushes a finger into me. Moving against the balls. Oh God please Linc let me cum already. Then he pushes a second finger into me. If he doesn't stop soon I am going to cum.

He pulls his fingers out. I am ready, he will put a plug in. Then watch as I struggle to cum without losing either the balls or the plug. Then I hear it. The distinctive tear of a condom opening. I take a deep breath and let out a moaning sigh. Linc is going to fuck me, this could be very painful.

Then he is up against me. He pushes just the head into me. He taps my hip, Linc's way of telling me to embed myself on him. I move slowly, letting him slowly invade me. Fill me beyond capacity. Then he leans over me again, suckling at my neck. Waiting for my body to relax around him. This is going to be a pleasure fuck.

He begins moving slowly, pulling out so just the head remains. Making me beg for him to thrust again. Each thrust, every withdrawal moves the balls. He builds slowly pushing me up, backing off, pushing me up again.

Then he's thrusting hard pushing us both. I am going to explode. Linc mouth is on my shoulder, licking, nibbling, then he drives into me cumming, biting down breaking the skin, sucking me into him. I shatter into a million pieces collapsing beneath Linc.


End file.
